Whats the worst excuse you`ve heard for not attending a game ?

Rags to a mate of mine on the tram "Is this Old Trafford?". Mate "Yes, you need to get off"

Off they got. It wasn't... it was G-Mex. Don't know if they got to the game, but would love to think they missed it
 
I'm using its too hot tonight. 41° in the shade.
Prefer to sit on the beach and listen on the radio rather than drive and put up with another pathetic performance.

(Melbourne City).
 
“Can’t go because I’m getting married”(1997). Wouldn’t mind but I was marrying a Bromley girl and we were only down the road at Charlton away (2-2)

“I’m going to get that jumper from Stolen from Ivor so you can use my ticket” (1987). Manchester City 10 (Ten) Huddersfield Town 1!!!!
 

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