CityInWashingtonState
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- 5 Aug 2017
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- 2,624
- Team supported
- Manchester City is my team - until I fucking die.
Why thank you, I will! Same to you!
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Joke thread
- Thread starter mrcunny
- Start date
talkativesprout
Well-Known Member
- Joined
- 30 Mar 2009
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- 10,141
A sadist, a masochist, a murderer, a zoophile, a pyromanic and a necrophile are all sitting on a bench in a mental institution. "Let's have sex with a cat" said the zoophile.
"Let's have sex with a cat and then torture it" says the sadist.
"Let's have sex with a cat, torture it and then kill it" shouted the murderer.
"Let's have sex with a cat, torture it, kill it and then have sex with it again" said the necrophile. "Let's have sex with a cat, torture it, kill it, have sex with it again and then burn it" said the pyromanic.
There was silence and then the masochist said: ''Miaow''.
Apologies if i nicked it from here in the first place
"Let's have sex with a cat and then torture it" says the sadist.
"Let's have sex with a cat, torture it and then kill it" shouted the murderer.
"Let's have sex with a cat, torture it, kill it and then have sex with it again" said the necrophile. "Let's have sex with a cat, torture it, kill it, have sex with it again and then burn it" said the pyromanic.
There was silence and then the masochist said: ''Miaow''.
Apologies if i nicked it from here in the first place
Le Havre Oswald
Well-Known Member
Some bird just came up to me and said
"I'm fucking sick of my boyfriend always calling me a donkey, I've told him to stop but eeeeeaaawwwways does it."
I'll get my coat. Bye
"I'm fucking sick of my boyfriend always calling me a donkey, I've told him to stop but eeeeeaaawwwways does it."
I'll get my coat. Bye
Deepest Blue
Well-Known Member
- Joined
- 20 May 2010
- Messages
- 9,746
2 Wigginers sharing half of Mild in the pub.
1st says "I ate one of them German Fruit Cakes today"
2nd says "Was it Stollen?"
1st says "Nay, I bought it at Aldi's
Wigginer goes in the Vets Surgery
"I've come to get my cat seen to"
Vet says "Is it a Tom?"
WiggIner "Nay, it's outside in a cage".
1st says "I ate one of them German Fruit Cakes today"
2nd says "Was it Stollen?"
1st says "Nay, I bought it at Aldi's
Wigginer goes in the Vets Surgery
"I've come to get my cat seen to"
Vet says "Is it a Tom?"
WiggIner "Nay, it's outside in a cage".
MelbourneBlue
Well-Known Member
My dwarf girlfriend has been a bit down recently because people keep making remarks on her size.
So to cheer her up when she gets home from work, I've got her flowers, chocolates, wine and I'm going to run her a nice hot sink.
So to cheer her up when she gets home from work, I've got her flowers, chocolates, wine and I'm going to run her a nice hot sink.
BlueHammer85
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- Joined
- 13 Oct 2010
- Messages
- 33,731
My dwarf girlfriend has been a bit down recently because people keep making remarks on her size.
So to cheer her up when she gets home from work, I've got her flowers, chocolates, wine and I'm going to run her a nice hot sink.
That made me smile briefly
M
M
mat
Guest
Jonny fucking Evans
dronefromsector7G
Well-Known Member
A mummy has been discovered in an Egyptian tomb, covered in chocolate and hazelnuts.
Experts believe it is a Pharaoh Rocher
Experts believe it is a Pharaoh Rocher
M
M
mat
Guest
That made me groan and chuckle at same time.A mummy has been discovered in an Egyptian tomb, covered in chocolate and hazelnuts.
Experts believe it is a Pharaoh Rocher
BimboBob
Well-Known Member
Nope.Trump turns to the EC and says, "No. Don't worry. The Mexicans will pay for it."
Nope.
Sorry but nope.
What are the Mexicans paying for and why?