Funeral etiquette

[1961_vintage]

The funeral is an opportunity for you to celebrate the life of your friend, to provide support to her family and friends through your presence, and of course to be supported yourself as you mourn her loss. Whilst there is a time and a place for it - the funeral is absolutely not the occasion for speculating on the what and the why.

All the best for tomorrow.

 

[peoffrey]

Just don't mention the suicide bit,the family won't thank you if that is going round on the 2nd worst day of their lives

I have no intention of doing so. It's natural to be curious when a younger person passes away as you don't expect it. My mate Wardy was terminally ill as was Danny (Billy Big Spuds on here.) He actually started a thread to discuss his treatment. Brave lad.

Needless to say, we've been asked to donate to Mind in lieu of flowers. I just can't believe this has happened to such a ray of sunshine. Always happy. Always smiling. Everybody liked her.

Hopefully we can just say goodbye tomorrow. Share some memories.

 

[City Raider]

My best mate committed suicide. His 10 year old boy asked me to read out his last message he'd written for his Dad at the service. He was in bits as I read it, still not sure how I got through that day. Try and share happy memories is all I'd say. Good luck.

 

[cibaman]

I imagine there would be some(subtle) reference made during the service

THere doesn't have to be. I attended a catholic funeral where the sister delivered the eulogy. She spoke of his sudden death, tragically dying young etc but no one mentioned that he committed suicide

 

[Blue Hefner]

THere doesn't have to be. I attended a catholic funeral where the sister delivered the eulogy. She spoke of his sudden death, tragically dying young etc but no one mentioned that he committed suicide

I wouldn't expect them to use those words, it is a sin after-all isn't it? I would expect, like you said 'dying young', 'tragically' etc and it would be up to the congregation to read between the lines

 

[Magicpole]

I wouldn't expect them to use those words, it is a sin after-all isn't it? I would expect, like you said 'dying young', 'tragically' etc and it would be up to the congregation to read between the lines

I don't think many agree with that utter garbage that it is a sin anymore. The mental anguish someone suffers before acting to take their own life, is not the decision of a healthy mind. For those who take their morality from any holy book that condemns people who are clearly suffering are wrong and to be clear, make me sick.

When this type of tragedy strikes a family and friends of an individual they loved, then to have someone who believes in talking snakes telling them their loved one would be punished for being ill is immoral and to me disgusting.

If this happened to anyone I loved and some bible bashing nut said that to me about them, there is a 100% chance the result of that conversation would see me helping police with their enquiries.

This is a time for love and sorrow that you couldn't prevent it. To mourn the anguish they endured and to try and support those left behind trying to deal with it. Religion raising its Bronze Age ugly head with this type of nonsense, should be consigned in the bin of religious doctrine that actively burned women for being witches.

Mourn this young woman and ignore any suggestion that she failed God. She existed, people felt her love and that she was a good person, you cannot say that about the invisible man in the sky.

Mental illness kills suicide victims. Are we to say mental illness is a sin? Any religion that still holds this view of suicide victims, is a disgusting cult and it is they who should be shunned.

As I said though, most, including religious people, don't agree with this and it's time the churches publicly disavow this disgraceful position.

 

[Blue Hefner]

I don't think many agree with that utter garbage that it is a sin anymore. The mental anguish someone suffers before acting to take their own life, is not the decision of a healthy mind. For those who take their morality from any holy book that condemns people who are clearly suffering are wrong and to be clear, make me sick.

When this type of tragedy strikes a family and friends of an individual they loved, then to have someone who believes in talking snakes telling them their loved one would be punished for being ill is immoral and to me disgusting.

If this happened to anyone I loved and some bible bashing nut said that to me about them, there is a 100% chance the result of that conversation would see me helping police with their enquiries.

This is a time for love and sorrow that you couldn't prevent it. To mourn the anguish they endured and to try and support those left behind trying to deal with it. Religion raising its Bronze Age ugly head with this type of nonsense, should be consigned in the bin of religious doctrine that actively burned women for being witches.

Mourn this young woman and ignore any suggestion that she failed God. She existed, people felt her love and that she was a good person, you cannot say that about the invisible man in the sky.

Mental illness kills suicide victims. Are we to say mental illness is a sin? Any religion that still holds this view of suicide victims, is a disgusting cult and it is they who should be shunned.

As I said though, most, including religious people, don't agree with this and it's time the churches publicly disavow this disgraceful position.

First of all. In the interests of any accidental misunderstanding. That is NOT my view. But, it is still the view of the Church, isn't it? As a result, I would not expect them to mention it during the service. Like I said, it is probably down to the congregation, who don't know the reason for death, to read between the lines

 

[Magicpole]

First of all. In the interests of any accidental misunderstanding. That is NOT my view. But, it is still the view of the Church, isn't it? As a result, I would not expect them to mention it during the service. Like I said, it is probably down to the congregation, who don't know the reason for death, to read between the lines

I knew that wasn't your view, that you were just raising it, as it is still a view held by some religious groups.

I was focusing on those that do believe it not your good self.

 

[warpig]

Peoffrey, I'm a little confused what asking here. Excuse my ignorance but are you enquiring whether or Not you should go to the funeral and ask if she committed suicide?

 

[BimboBob]

I hope it goes ok today Jim. Thinking of you mate.