Cat deterrents.

paphos-mcfc

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Any one know anything that actually works on our feline friends as I've tried virtually everything. They even shat in the OH's lavender (a deterrent apparently) and I was picking clag out of other pots this morning. They're shitting fucking everywhere. Even bought a spray which was minging and that turned out to be more of a human deterrent. Waste of money.

Several of the 'offending' pussies belong to her highness next door and as she has no garden as such, they're coming here to drop their load and shag (the cats). It's fucking turd terrace at the moment. Now, I am an animal lover and shooting them or putting lanate/moth balls is out of the question. So have to look for another natural solution.

I would love to be polite and civilized and approach the Evil Gargoyle and tell her to fuck them off to her family house in the village, but I wouldn't be able to hold back and would more than likely throttle the sinister sweeping old fucking hag. (Bill?)

So I ask, is there anyone on here that has used something that they can guarantee has an affect on deterring the cats from the garden?

Thanks in advance.

Paphos

P.S I can't afford to; move house, concrete everywhere, or have the whole garden enclosed and cat proof.
 
HorshamBlue said:
Get a lion.

Brilliant!! I forgot to mention though mate that I have a 1 year old son. If I did get one though, I'd release it in her garden, lock her gates and film the carnage.
 
Citrus scents are supposed to be cat deterrents.
You could try befriending the cats to a point where they are thinking your yard is theirs. Cats don't shit in their own garden.
 
Sprinkler with a motion sensor.

contech-scarecrow-sprinkler-in-action.jpg
 
There's metal cat ornaments you can get with shiny eyes that's supposed to stop cats coming into your garden. I'm not sure where you get them from though.
 
paphos-mcfc said:
HorshamBlue said:
Get a lion.

Brilliant!! I forgot to mention though mate that I have a 1 year old son. If I did get one though, I'd release it in her garden, lock her gates and film the carnage.

Next best thing then is a bucket of lion shit, available at most zoos and safari near parks near you
 
[bigimg]http://stream1.gifsoup.com/view4/3783892/catcopter-o.gif[/bigimg]

[bigimg]http://s3-ec.buzzfed.com/static/enhanced/web05/2012/6/4/10/enhanced-buzz-wide-5803-1338819107-8.jpg[/bigimg]
 

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