Whats the worst excuse you`ve heard for not attending a game ?

Wife is going into labour, I mean WTF you have the rest of your life to look at the sprog.
 
I nearly had the best one with the Liverpool game on the 14th City posted the tickets with only my postcode showing, luckily the postman had the nous to rip the envelope so he could see the full address... Thank fuck he's not a rag ..! Ticket office is useless...!
 
the first mr k when he said i can't take you to the game as the ship is at sea,swim home for the game you lazy fucker
*waves at him*
 
Got home from QF of FA cup knowing we were meeting United in Semi at Wembley, came in and Mrs said “ I’ve booked us a holiday on your next run of rest days “ I knew that was when the semi was and went berserk
Went on the holiday and it still hurts I wasn’t at that one
 

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