What’s your worst holiday experience, destination?

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BlueMoonRisin’ said:
I went late September and it wasn't too busy. I stayed at the far end but if i went back the old town is the better end of of the resort.

You're too not far off being a FOC mate; )
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The new town bit is grim. The problem I found with it was that there were 9 blokes for every 2 woman and this caused tension. I went with my mates and felt like it was going to kick off all the time. Saw 4 fights in 3 nights including one between two women pulling each other’s hair on the ground in the middle of the Main Street. It was like an episode of Shameless being played out in the Sun!
 
bluetonium said:
Cuba, Antigua, then Dom Rep first time.

Cuba we were really ill and we're upgraded because the all inclusive hotel food cleanliness was very questionable, but being upgraded when you are fighting each other for the bog is not really a luxury. You know when you are shitting water so much that you have cramps, and then there's nothing left in your arse but the cramps are still there? Yeah, that was that's Cuba for us. Situated in some swampy mangroves that stunk and mosquitoes everywhere. Had to have a cigar at all times to clear them off. But the cigar lounge and drinks were top class, guy there called Ruben who had worked at some big hotels in America and knew his stuff. Went on a day trip and got left in some village where our chewing gum was taken from us, I think in return for just letting us be there. Saved us that, a proper whiskey sour and a cigar.

First Choice didn't give a crap when we got back and felt like we'd spent hundred of pounds on giving ourself the squits in a hot, sticky country. Holiday was also sold to us as a Robinson Crusoe type escape, they failed to mention it was also Canadian spring break, and the Canadians at the time just loved going to Cuba especially because their American cousins couldn't. Kids drinking and spewing all night, fights, used condoms on the beach. Gave Blackpool a run for it's money.

Antigua was great except for two things. My missus got far too squiffy on white rum on the first night and was ill for days, and near the end of our trip we were held up by a guy with a machete who decided to stop our taxi randomly. Taxi driver was off his tits on something, but thankfully they did a deal and we got back to the hotel.

Dom Rep in third place because it was my first big holiday outside of backpacking. It was basically magaluf in the Caribbean, pissed up Brits en masse, drinks in plastic cups like at a kids party because nobody was trusted with glass, strongly not recommended to leave the secure hotel complex, but when we did it was actually the best part of the trip. Plus it was ridiculously hot and you couldn't move without dripping, regularly over 100.

Don't get me wrong, all fantastic places and glad I went, well maybe except Cuba, but that was probably our hotel choice rather than the country.
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Never go less than 5 star in Cuba unless you don't plan on eating. 5 Cuban stars is 3 anywhere else stars.
 
Cape Verde - Sal - boring lunar landscape and blows a constant gale

most of the costs del sol - looks like it was designed by a 5 year old with a lego set and what a load of shit beaches - benidorm is beyond grim and makes Albufeira over here look sophisticated. Puerto Banus is ok for a day out…
 
These post’s and the thread deserves its place in the “ classics thread “some absolute belters well done to everyone for take a bow.
 
£99, 4 days, Benidorm. Hell on Earth!!

Bummimg a bird from St Helens who was dressed as Jane from Tarzan was the only highlight of that god forsaken trip. Said bird was on our plane home and I watched her run and fling herself into her fellas arms at John Lennon still with my man juice keeping her shit warm.

Was also the trip I got to the airport out of my head, realised my suitcase was light as fuck, opened it and remembered I hadn't packed any of my stuff up. Remembered my passport and asthma spray.
 
AlgarveBlu said:
Cape Verde - Sal - boring lunar landscape and blows a constant gale

most of the costs del sol - looks like it was designed by a 5 year old with a lego set and what a load of shit beaches - benidorm is beyond grim and makes Albufeira over here look sophisticated. Puerto Banus is ok for a day out…
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Isn't one of the valleys on Cape Verde (allegedly) where all the hurricanes that cross into the Caribbean are formed? Something to do with the humidity and heat, plus the wind direction.
(Either that or that burger has made me hallucinate)
 
Our honeymoon, February whenever, Hammamet, Tunisia. Hired a motorbike for the pair of us and took a trip down the main highway. Far too dangerous so we turned off and rode across country with the sound of explosions coming from somewhere. Turns out we were on the Tunisian armies firing range being shelled, 2 up on a 50cc chicken chaser...through craters and pot holes. Definatley one for the grandkids.
 
Nick_1985 said:
£99, 4 days, Benidorm. Hell on Earth!!

Bummimg a bird from St Helens who was dressed as Jane from Tarzan was the only highlight of that god forsaken trip. Said bird was on our plane home and I watched her run and fling herself into her fellas arms at John Lennon still with my man juice keeping her shit warm.

Was also the trip I got to the airport out of my head, realised my suitcase was light as fuck, opened it and remembered I hadn't packed any of my stuff up. Remembered my passport and asthma spray.
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About right for St Helens
 
kevin horlocks wand said:
it’s horrible did you get there in a time machine ?

I went to play the golf course once. The town, my god
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worsleyweb said:
I will go for 5 days in a caravan in Siloth in Cumbria. Horrendous. Just don’t ever go.
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Lovely place what's the matter with ya ?! My worst experience Torquay in a caravan 78 World Cup next to a family of Jocks. Traumatised at the age of 10. We left early. Who wants to stay in a caravan anyway ? Jeez.
 
Croatia

Wife lost half a finger. A metal chair had not been folded out properly. So when she sat down and went to shuffle towards a table, her weight on the chair made it fold out and unfortunately cut half a finger off.
 
Lots of Benidorm nay'sayers to thread. However for those intellectuals that J'adore culture and ambience in abundance then here without further to do is the Numero Uno No's 1 Spanish resort in it's last ever full on Festival before lockdown. Hopefully we'll all be back real soon.

A nice turn out with some mucho excellante costumes adorning the shiny happy people from Gods own country. So pour yourself a flaggon of San Miguel, sit right back and reminisce a while:

Festival 2019

 
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My second worst ever holiday was my honeymoon in 1975! We'd booked a caravan on Anglesey, Red Wharf Bay, but a month before the wedding my car, a mark 2 Cortina, was nicked. My dad took us down there on the Sunday, but we were limited to close to the site, as public transport was very sketchy. Still, we had other things to keep us amused. ;-))
Then Sunday night I started with the shits! It must have been amusing for other holidaymakers to see the curtains of a newly wedded couple closing on a regular basis, but the reality was that the toilet was fitted in the broom cupboard, and I couldn't shut the door properly as my knees kept pushing it open, so closing the curtains was the only option.
I phoned my dad on Tuesday night to tell him of my plight, and Wednesday asked him to come and pick us up as I was really ill. Thursday saw me at the doctors, where I got some medication to slow it down, and I was fine by weekend. I'd lost half a stone in 4 days! We laughed about it for years, but at the time it was a nightmare.
Fast forward 35 years, to my worst ever holiday. On holiday in the Dordogne, my wife died in my arms.
it doesn't get worse than that.
 
Nick_1985 said:
Haha what a place. Went in 2007, my girlfriend at the time won a holiday there at work and decided to take me and her parents along. There was me thinking it was going to be 10 days of chilling around the villa pool doing fuck all but her Dad hired a car and decided he wanted to see the entirety of Southern Spain in little over a week. Proper Rag fucker did nowt bit bang on about how shit City were. By day 2 I'd found the resort cocaine dealer and was drinking 2 litre milk cartons full of local firewater. By day 5 nobody was talking to me, my girlfriend had dragged us to Mercia Zoo in 100 degree weather and being full of coke and wine collapsed at the birds of prey show and got took to hospital. By day 7 I was off my face at the Abba tribute night getting sucked off on the cricket pitch by some rich 50 year old woman with my relationship in absolute tatters. It was brilliant.

We got back. I packed my stuff and left. Thanks for the free holiday. For what it's worth I thought it was a great place. Nice little private beach down the cliff. Local drugs were great and the town over is like something out of a 60s Western with 50c beers.
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Nick_1985 said:
£99, 4 days, Benidorm. Hell on Earth!!

Bummimg a bird from St Helens who was dressed as Jane from Tarzan was the only highlight of that god forsaken trip. Said bird was on our plane home and I watched her run and fling herself into her fellas arms at John Lennon still with my man juice keeping her shit warm.

Was also the trip I got to the airport out of my head, realised my suitcase was light as fuck, opened it and remembered I hadn't packed any of my stuff up. Remembered my passport and asthma spray.
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Your posts have a Fear & Loathing In Las Vegas vibe going on.

Bluemoon's very own Hunter S Thompson.
 
crazyg said:
My second worst ever holiday was my honeymoon in 1975! We'd booked a caravan on Anglesey, Red Wharf Bay, but a month before the wedding my car, a mark 2 Cortina, was nicked. My dad took us down there on the Sunday, but we were limited to close to the site, as public transport was very sketchy. Still, we had other things to keep us amused. ;-))
Then Sunday night I started with the shits! It must have been amusing for other holidaymakers to see the curtains of a newly wedded couple closing on a regular basis, but the reality was that the toilet was fitted in the broom cupboard, and I couldn't shut the door properly as my knees kept pushing it open, so closing the curtains was the only option.
I phoned my dad on Tuesday night to tell him of my plight, and Wednesday asked him to come and pick us up as I was really ill. Thursday saw me at the doctors, where I got some medication to slow it down, and I was fine by weekend. I'd lost half a stone in 4 days! We laughed about it for years, but at the time it was a nightmare.
Fast forward 35 years, to my worst ever holiday. On holiday in the Dordogne, my wife died in my arms.
it doesn't get worse than that.
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Great story..first part , sorry for your loss blue
 
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