How fucking big are your sandwiches?

Lay off the baguette and they might actually fit in a small bag then.

In seriousness though, I find it difficult to have sympathy with people taking bags to a game of football. It lasts less than two hours. It isn't a picnic or an artic expedition.

If you leave the house for, say, three or four hours in other circumstances to do something else, how often do you think 'well, I can only step foot out of this door if I have a supply of ham sandwiches/stewed tea/bag of sweets/ipad/good book/whatever else?

It cant be that difficult to go without.

And for those that claim it takes them hours and hours to get to and from the game and they cant go without, surely there is plenty of time on the journey to eat them in better surrounding than a shite plastic seat at half time. In the warm car, on the train, at a nice stop off etc.

The point is, the reason for not having bags surely trumps your desire for a cheese and pickle nap every time you leave the house.

Also, if everyone took a bag we'd still be queueing to get in the day after the game. Everyone with a bag causes delays for the majority that can manage a couple of hours without Delia's avocado wrap.

Also, and I might be wrong in this, but does the original post suggest that the condition that 'affects us all as we get older' is needing a piss at half time due to weaker bladders? Apologies if it is something more serious and I've misunderstood, but if it is what I have read it as, surely half the crowd could claim that one.
 
Never had a problem with my motorbike bag (A3 size). Probably look hard so they don't mess with me ;) My dad was stopped by a nobber that said he couldn't take a drink in with him - challenge accepted I told him it isn't a bloody music gig and to get his boss - moved along pretty quickly.
 
The OP has a very specific set of requirements that he / she is unwilling to compromise whatsoever as they have been in place for decades. This doesn’t fit in with any organisation that evolves its practices over time and it is bound to result in confrontation. When then happens it is inevitable that the individual will lose.

I don’t want to stand in a big queue to enter SS3 via the M1 entrance as I reckon it has the largest number of people having to go through it. However, I do want to continue to attend matches so I reluctantly put myself through such an ordeal.
 
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