Favourite euphemism

[idahoblues]

Big boned

 

[mikemcfc]

I prefer a double entendre

Let me know it you’re interested and I’ll give you one

if i said your wife had a beautiful body would she hold it against me?

 

[mikemcfc]

A bit light on his loafers

putts from the rough

 

[mikemcfc]

The art of the euphemism is dying because we are all much more open now and freer with certain words. Someone should start a national euphemism society to keep the art alive, inventing new uses,
The best modern one is "pearl necklace".
How about "I polished her vagazzle".

It's vagizzle, fa shizzle, bizzle. ;)

 

[mikemcfc]

"going to see a man about a dog" iir is an Aussie one for a #2
My fave is, making some management, or making some foreman.

 

[StrangewaysHereWeCome]

Puddle jumper. Rather than walk through one or step around it, a man who light on his feet elects to vault over a puddle in order not to get his shoes wet.
A man who is quite partial to gagging on cock.

 

[Bigg Bigg Blue]

He helps them out when they are busy

 

[Tuearts right boot]

As my ex mother in law would say...
Just going to water my orchid

She al ways made laugh.
Another one she came out with

It would be like throwing a sausage up George Street.

 

[Tuearts right boot]

given birth to a mudchild.....

Nauticals ( miles ) which are the same as Farmers ( Giles )

Launch an air biscuit ( fart )

andrexia nervosa ( having the shits and being scared to fart )

A lardon ( what a big lad gets when entering a branch of Greggs )

Poogle ( the art of looking things up on the phone whilst taking a shit )

Fanny like Attenborough's Passport ( well thumbed )

Ciderfects ( hangover from too much cider )

Yellow fronted brown backs ( Y fronts in desperate need of a wash )

Sacnia scotch aka Truckers Tizer aka wagon wine ( those plastic bottles of piss seen in lay by's )

Sounds like you've been drinking with Roger Mellie

 

[Dave Ewing's Back 'eader]

After the old man next door passed away, his widow (in her 80's) used to ask me to do the odd chore for her, including a bit of gardening.
She once asked me if I could call round and trim her bush!

And yer went over, no doubt with a hair trimmer rather than a pair of garden shears?