Not talking family members!!

[Uncle Wally One Ball]

My brother fell out with our parents and me and didn't see my mother for the last few years of her life.

Which I'm guessing he really regrets.

I don't miss him and have no sympathy, as he was the architect of his own misfortune.

Hi Rhodri

 

[Bilboblue]

I have 3 older sisters and haven't talked to one of them for 3 years for several different reasons.
Is this odd or have any of you experienced a fallout with a family member??

Haven't talked to my brother in 20+ years, except to tell him to fuck off. Recently heard he has a brain tumour and will undergo an operation to attempt to remove it. Still have no intention of contacting him, he's a c*nt, he was always a c*nt and will always be a c*nt. Did so many things to try and unsettle the family when younger because his life was a clusterfuck, and everybody else was doing ok.

Haven't spoke to my father in 25 years, I'll never forgive the twat for beating me when I was a kid, sometimes with a fkn cricket bat, I won't go to either of their funerals and have it written in my will neither are wanted at mine, if I go first.

 

[TFC]

I wholeheartedly agree with the sentiment of keeping toxic people out of your life, whether they are family or not.

My Dad was/is a piece of shit, couldn't tell you if he was alive or dead, couldn't give a fuck either way. It's of no benefit to me to have people around me who want to drag me down.

 

[bluemoon32]

Sometimes it can be the parents fault when siblings fall out.
My Mother has always played my Sister,Brother and myself off against each other and it's taken us all until middle age to fully accept that's what she's been doing but it's caused us to have a fractured relationship at times.
My Sister and Brother rarely bother with my Mother anymore but as the eldest i try to keep the peace between them all. My Mother is now 80 years old and in poor health and only my youngest Son and i bother with her anymore & that's sad.
We do everything for her and my Sister and Brother ( who do nothing) constantly ask me "why" and the only answer i can give is " i know she's toxic and i know she's been horrible but she's my Mum".
My Mum's latest thing is mouthing off about changing her will and leaving everything to my Son and i but i've told her her in no uncertain terms that if she does that then i'll stop seeing her too as that would just wreck my relationship with my Sister & Brother but i have the feeling she'll have the last laugh from the grave and drop a grenade into our lives after death.
I don't like my Mother but leaving an 80 years old Woman in ill health to fend for herself isn't something i can do, no matter how awful she's been during her life.
Family can suck but i suppose i'm that family member who feels a sense of duty & i get used because of that but i am what i am & won't change now.
As long as my Mother doesn't change her will, i believe it'll take her death to bring myself, Sister and Brother closer together & that's so fcuking sad.
My four Children have their moments but i'd be mortified if they ever fell out and stopped seeing each other, i don't know why my Mum takes so much glee out of seeing her Children do it but she has and still does.

 

[worsleyweb]

Sometimes it can be the parents fault when siblings fall out.
My Mother has always played my Sister,Brother and myself off against each other and it's taken us all until middle age to fully accept that's what she's been doing but it's caused us to have a fractured relationship at times.
My Sister and Brother rarely bother with my Mother anymore but as the eldest i try to keep the peace between them all. My Mother is now 80 years old and in poor health and only my youngest Son and i bother with her anymore & that's sad.
We do everything for her and my Sister and Brother ( who do nothing) constantly ask me "why" and the only answer i can give is " i know she's toxic and i know she's been horrible but she's my Mum".
My Mum's latest thing is mouthing off about changing her will and leaving everything to my Son and i but i've told her her in no uncertain terms that if she does that then i'll stop seeing her too as that would just wreck my relationship with my Sister & Brother but i have the feeling she'll have the last laugh from the grave and drop a grenade into our lives after death.
I don't like my Mother but leaving an 80 years old Woman in ill health to fend for herself isn't something i can do, no matter how awful she's been during her life.
Family can suck but i suppose i'm that family member who feels a sense of duty & i get used because of that but i am what i am & won't change now.
As long as my Mother doesn't change her will, i believe it'll take her death to bring myself, Sister and Brother closer together & that's so fcuking sad.
My four Children have their moments but i'd be mortified if they ever fell out and stopped seeing each other, i don't know why my Mum takes so much glee out of seeing her Children do it but she has and still does.

Bloody hell can I relate to that. My mum exactly.

 

[bluemoon32]

Bloody hell can I relate to that. My mum exactly.

Hi Bro

 

[DenisLawBackHeel74]

Fallen out with various family members over the years but somehow we made up our differences along the way. The most recent was my brother. We fell out because his wife was a bit of a twat and had tried to have him, and the rest of my family cut ties with a family friend who she didn’t like but who had been considered almost part of our family for last 35 years!!

we sorted it out after about 2 years.

my advice would be to not have people in your life who you don’t want there....family or not.

 

[journolud]

Probably pretty standard in my contact with my brother and two sisters, Christmas and a couple of times a year we get together, see my brother more often, It about does me, one of my sisters used to take the huff for months at a time and I’m not sure the two sisters get on that well.

I hate the thought that my two sons might drift apart when they are older, would probably see it as a failure on my part

 

[gandalfthebrave]

As a kid I watched my mother constantly argue, agitate, play the victim and fall out with her siblings in particular.

I vowed never to fall out with my family when I got older as a result.

Then, I grew older, and realised exactly why everyone fell out with my mother. To say she’s a difficult character would be the understatement of the century.

We’ve been estranged for a few years and now I have kids of my own. As much as it pains me because she’s my mother, I think the lives of my kids, my partner and I are all better for her absence.

So, so sad. But having agonised over it for several years, I’ve felt no urge whatsoever to reach out to her.

I get on absolutely fine with all of my siblings, my father and my extended family (except the step mother, but that’s another story!) I even get on with the in laws, and my mother in law is great. You can’t have it all, I suppose.

 

[city saint]

i

Sometimes it can be the parents fault when siblings fall out.
My Mother has always played my Sister,Brother and myself off against each other and it's taken us all until middle age to fully accept that's what she's been doing but it's caused us to have a fractured relationship at times.
My Sister and Brother rarely bother with my Mother anymore but as the eldest i try to keep the peace between them all. My Mother is now 80 years old and in poor health and only my youngest Son and i bother with her anymore & that's sad.
We do everything for her and my Sister and Brother ( who do nothing) constantly ask me "why" and the only answer i can give is " i know she's toxic and i know she's been horrible but she's my Mum".
My Mum's latest thing is mouthing off about changing her will and leaving everything to my Son and i but i've told her her in no uncertain terms that if she does that then i'll stop seeing her too as that would just wreck my relationship with my Sister & Brother but i have the feeling she'll have the last laugh from the grave and drop a grenade into our lives after death.
I don't like my Mother but leaving an 80 years old Woman in ill health to fend for herself isn't something i can do, no matter how awful she's been during her life.
Family can suck but i suppose i'm that family member who feels a sense of duty & i get used because of that but i am what i am & won't change now.
As long as my Mother doesn't change her will, i believe it'll take her death to bring myself, Sister and Brother closer together & that's so fcuking sad.
My four Children have their moments but i'd be mortified if they ever fell out and stopped seeing each other, i don't know why my Mum takes so much glee out of seeing her Children do it but she has and still does.

f she does change her will just divide it up equally and divvy it up you will improve everyones perception of you then