Parents threatening their children

I was regularly chased around the living room table with a wooden Schole shoe. I can feel the draft of it now as it just missed my arse. Nowadays you cant even raise your voice without the threat of being filmed and reported to Twitter, Facebook, Grindr or Mumsnet. Snowflakes, the lot of them. The kids are just as bad.
 
I've got a neighbour who's constantly threatening to 'twat' her kids and beat them up for the most minor thing on a daily basis pretty much. The thing is, I've never seen the kids with injuries and they seem pretty normal, albeit sadly likely to turn out the way their mum is. Nearly every time I'm in the garden I hear it. What should I do? The kids are maybe about 12 and 10 years old.

what’s the neighbour like when you talk with her?
 
what’s the neighbour like when you talk with her?


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What would you suggest he does
 
I was regularly chased around the living room table with a wooden Schole shoe. I can feel the draft of it now as it just missed my arse. Nowadays you cant even raise your voice without the threat of being filmed and reported to Twitter, Facebook, Grindr or Mumsnet. Snowflakes, the lot of them. The kids are just as bad.

Ducking through the doorway with my mum trying to swing for me was an olympic sport :)
 
I've got a neighbour who's constantly threatening to 'twat' her kids and beat them up for the most minor thing on a daily basis pretty much. The thing is, I've never seen the kids with injuries and they seem pretty normal, albeit sadly likely to turn out the way their mum is. Nearly every time I'm in the garden I hear it. What should I do? The kids are maybe about 12 and 10 years old.

How do you know they don't have multiple injuries on their bodies?

I would keep monitoring the situation, and if you have concerns contact the police or social services.

She doesn't need to know you have contacted them.
 
I've got a neighbour who's constantly threatening to 'twat' her kids and beat them up for the most minor thing on a daily basis pretty much. The thing is, I've never seen the kids with injuries and they seem pretty normal, albeit sadly likely to turn out the way their mum is. Nearly every time I'm in the garden I hear it. What should I do? The kids are maybe about 12 and 10 years old.
Is there a Dad or a bloke around the place? She may be struggling to manage or cope. If you make the authorities aware she may actually be glad of the intervention and some help perhaps
 
Ducking through the doorway with my mum trying to swing for me was an olympic sport :)
My mum never seemed to miss me when she launched one of her mules at me, many a time I copped it on the back of the head just when I thought I was safely distanced, never did me no harm.
 
The kind of abuse that affects children the most is constant shouting, emotional abuse and belittling, leaving children confused and frightened. It affects their sense of well-being, confidence, self esteem and stays with them for life. I’m still surprised in this day and age that people think it’s ok so long as they aren’t hit or marked, as some people have alluded to on this thread. Many of us were hit by parents that cared for and loved us. That was then and we were emotionally resilient because we were loved. Yet ask any adult who was constantly put down, screamed at and had their sense of worth shattered as a kid what that was like and they will break your heart with how it has affected them for life. I work with children and adults who have suffered trauma and suffering at both ends of the spectrum. Take it from me, if this is not an isolated incident do something about it... don’t sit back and think it’s somebody else’s responsibility. Safeguarding children is everybody’s responsibility.

That's what I'm wrestling with at the minute.

Emotional abuse can be just as destructive as physical abuse and hearing the way she constantly bullies and screams at them at the top of her voice angers me when the kids have done very little/nothing to deserve it.

I think there are probably two main types of children when it comes to dealing with parents who become physical/strict to the point of abusive:

1. Those who can deal with it and as they grow older, almost wear it with a badge of pride.
2, Those who can't deal with it and go quiet/shy/asocial and let it ruin their lives.

My neighbour's kids, I hope, fall under the first category. I've not seen them with any physical injuries, and they seem social and fairly normal if a little naughty at times (when out of the house), but sadly they look like they'll end up like their mum in terms of their behaviour and so the cycle will invariably continue. For those reasons, I'm leaning towards not reporting her at the minute but if it gets any worse then I will.

I know a few people who fall under the second category and most of them have had their lives ruined/badly affected by it and so many of them are alcoholics as a means of dealing with it. I'd hate for that to happen here and agree with your last sentence but obviously the difficult bit is whether and when to intervene if you've not got the full picture.
 

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