jimharri
Moderator
"I met a hula mistress somewhere in Waikiki".
Never has been, and never will be, bettered.
Never has been, and never will be, bettered.
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Genius words/lyrics
- Thread starter CockneyWanchor
- Start date
Eddie Harold used a tape recorder
When he had one of his girlfriends over
He didn't want to miss a single scream
His friends all laughed when he played it later
You had to wonder, did he really hate her?
Girls always made him nervous, that's to blame
And makin' love was just a crazy game
The woodwork squeaks and out come the freaks, oh yeah
The woodwork squeaks and out come the freaks, oh yeah
In her apartment was a plastic altar
She'd light a candle when her courage faltered
Sometimes the world got a little hard to bear
It wasn't easy living in the city, she wasn't clever and she wasn't pretty
She chanted in the night but no one cared
The woodwork squeaks and out come the freaks, mmm hmm
The woodwork squeaks and out come the freaks, oh yeah yeah Freddie's wife became a topless dancer
Had bondage parties with a Turkish bouncer
She's been evicted, the police have got her car
She tried to sell an antique shotgun
She said she knows some crazy guy who wants one (ah ah ah)
Her parents said "you're not our daughter, you're a whore. (So are U?)
It's over and you don't live here anymore."
The woodwork squeaks and out come the freaks
The woodwork squeaks and "Strangers In The Night"
The woodwork squeaks and "Papa's Got A Brand New Bag"
We're talkin' â??bout
The woodwork squeaks and "The Shadow Of Your Smile"
Ooh, we're talkin' â??bout
The woodwork squeaks and take the "Last Train To Clarksville"
Mmm, ahh, the woodwork squeaks and out come the freaks, oh
(Return to Valley of) Out Come the Freaks by Was (Not Was)
When he had one of his girlfriends over
He didn't want to miss a single scream
His friends all laughed when he played it later
You had to wonder, did he really hate her?
Girls always made him nervous, that's to blame
And makin' love was just a crazy game
The woodwork squeaks and out come the freaks, oh yeah
The woodwork squeaks and out come the freaks, oh yeah
In her apartment was a plastic altar
She'd light a candle when her courage faltered
Sometimes the world got a little hard to bear
It wasn't easy living in the city, she wasn't clever and she wasn't pretty
She chanted in the night but no one cared
The woodwork squeaks and out come the freaks, mmm hmm
The woodwork squeaks and out come the freaks, oh yeah yeah Freddie's wife became a topless dancer
Had bondage parties with a Turkish bouncer
She's been evicted, the police have got her car
She tried to sell an antique shotgun
She said she knows some crazy guy who wants one (ah ah ah)
Her parents said "you're not our daughter, you're a whore. (So are U?)
It's over and you don't live here anymore."
The woodwork squeaks and out come the freaks
The woodwork squeaks and "Strangers In The Night"
The woodwork squeaks and "Papa's Got A Brand New Bag"
We're talkin' â??bout
The woodwork squeaks and "The Shadow Of Your Smile"
Ooh, we're talkin' â??bout
The woodwork squeaks and take the "Last Train To Clarksville"
Mmm, ahh, the woodwork squeaks and out come the freaks, oh
(Return to Valley of) Out Come the Freaks by Was (Not Was)
bigstanhibbert
Well-Known Member
I never thought it would happen
With me and the girl from Clapham
Out on a windy common
That night I ain't forgotten
When she dealt out the rations
With some or other passions
I said "You are a lady"
"Perhaps", she said "I may be"
We moved into a basement
With thoughts of our engagement
We stayed in by the telly
Although the room was smelly
We spent our time just kissing
The railway arms were missing
But love had got us hooked up
And all our time it took up
I got a job with Stanley
He said I'd come in handy
And started me on Monday
So I had a bath on Sunday
I worked eleven hours
And bought the girl some flowers
She said she'd seen a doctor
And nothing now could stop her
I worked all through the winter
The weather brass and bitter
I put away a tenner
Each week to make her better
And when the time was ready
We had to sell the telly
Late evenings by the fire
With little kicks inside her
This morning at 4:50
I took her rather nifty
Down to an incubator
Where thirty minutes later
She gave birth to a daughter
Within a year a walker
She looked just like her mother
If there could be another
And now she's two years older
Her mother's with a soldier
She left me when my drinking
Became a proper stinging
The devil came and took me
From bar to street to bookie
No more nights by the telly
No more nights nappies smelling
Alone here in the kitchen
I feel there's something missing
I'd beg for some forgiveness
But begging's not my business
And she won't write a letter
Although I always tell her
And so it's my assumption
I'm really up the junction
With me and the girl from Clapham
Out on a windy common
That night I ain't forgotten
When she dealt out the rations
With some or other passions
I said "You are a lady"
"Perhaps", she said "I may be"
We moved into a basement
With thoughts of our engagement
We stayed in by the telly
Although the room was smelly
We spent our time just kissing
The railway arms were missing
But love had got us hooked up
And all our time it took up
I got a job with Stanley
He said I'd come in handy
And started me on Monday
So I had a bath on Sunday
I worked eleven hours
And bought the girl some flowers
She said she'd seen a doctor
And nothing now could stop her
I worked all through the winter
The weather brass and bitter
I put away a tenner
Each week to make her better
And when the time was ready
We had to sell the telly
Late evenings by the fire
With little kicks inside her
This morning at 4:50
I took her rather nifty
Down to an incubator
Where thirty minutes later
She gave birth to a daughter
Within a year a walker
She looked just like her mother
If there could be another
And now she's two years older
Her mother's with a soldier
She left me when my drinking
Became a proper stinging
The devil came and took me
From bar to street to bookie
No more nights by the telly
No more nights nappies smelling
Alone here in the kitchen
I feel there's something missing
I'd beg for some forgiveness
But begging's not my business
And she won't write a letter
Although I always tell her
And so it's my assumption
I'm really up the junction
Last edited:
bigstanhibbert
Well-Known Member
Puts up the closed sign does the man in the corner shop
Serves his last then he says goodbye to him
He knows it is a hard life
But its nice to be your own boss really
Walks off home does the last customer
He is jealous of the man in the corner shop
He is sick of working at the factory
Says it must be nice to be your own boss (really)
Sells cigars to the boss from the factory
He is jealous is the man in the corner shop
He is sick of struggling so hard
Says it might be nice to own a factory
Go to church do the people from the area
All shapes and classes sit and pray together
For here they are all one
For God created all men equal
Serves his last then he says goodbye to him
He knows it is a hard life
But its nice to be your own boss really
Walks off home does the last customer
He is jealous of the man in the corner shop
He is sick of working at the factory
Says it must be nice to be your own boss (really)
Sells cigars to the boss from the factory
He is jealous is the man in the corner shop
He is sick of struggling so hard
Says it might be nice to own a factory
Go to church do the people from the area
All shapes and classes sit and pray together
For here they are all one
For God created all men equal
Last edited:
talkativesprout
Well-Known Member
- Joined
- 30 Mar 2009
- Messages
- 10,141
My Book
Song by The Beautiful South
So quirky
This is my life and this is how it reads
For every chapter, a thousand memories
A murder, a mystery where everybody bleeds
A fantasy, a thriller with romance and disease
Diary entry 9th of May '62
We've had some ugly babies but none were quite like you
Diary entry '62 end of May
It looks as if the nose and chin are definitely here to stay
They're here to stay, they're here to stay
If my lips start smiling and my knees start a-knocking
I'm a failure
You are, you are
And if I seem half-hearted, it's because I'm broken hearted
And I'm a failure
You are, you are, you are (I am)
You are, you are, you are (I am)
This is my life and this is how it reads
A documentary that nobody believes
Albert Steptoe in 'Gone with the Breeze'
Mother played by Peter Beardsley, father by John Cleese
Diary entry '68 end of the year
A cardboard Apollo Six has given the all clear
11th December '68 Captain's log
Proposed trip to Mars is cancelled due to fog
It's due to fog, it's due to fog
If my lips start smiling and my knees start a-knocking
I'm a failure
You are, you are
And if I seem half-hearted, it's because I'm broken hearted
And I'm a failure
You are, you are, you are (I am)
You are, you are, you are (I am)
This is the play, it was I who wrote the script
Terry meets June in 'Tales from the Crypt'
It was going to be a film but the camera person slipped
They later found him scolding a banana
Diary entry tenth of April '89
The world is going mad but me I'm doing fine
I'm doing fine
Back to bed, back to reality
Just fine.
Song by The Beautiful South
So quirky
This is my life and this is how it reads
For every chapter, a thousand memories
A murder, a mystery where everybody bleeds
A fantasy, a thriller with romance and disease
Diary entry 9th of May '62
We've had some ugly babies but none were quite like you
Diary entry '62 end of May
It looks as if the nose and chin are definitely here to stay
They're here to stay, they're here to stay
If my lips start smiling and my knees start a-knocking
I'm a failure
You are, you are
And if I seem half-hearted, it's because I'm broken hearted
And I'm a failure
You are, you are, you are (I am)
You are, you are, you are (I am)
This is my life and this is how it reads
A documentary that nobody believes
Albert Steptoe in 'Gone with the Breeze'
Mother played by Peter Beardsley, father by John Cleese
Diary entry '68 end of the year
A cardboard Apollo Six has given the all clear
11th December '68 Captain's log
Proposed trip to Mars is cancelled due to fog
It's due to fog, it's due to fog
If my lips start smiling and my knees start a-knocking
I'm a failure
You are, you are
And if I seem half-hearted, it's because I'm broken hearted
And I'm a failure
You are, you are, you are (I am)
You are, you are, you are (I am)
This is the play, it was I who wrote the script
Terry meets June in 'Tales from the Crypt'
It was going to be a film but the camera person slipped
They later found him scolding a banana
Diary entry tenth of April '89
The world is going mad but me I'm doing fine
I'm doing fine
Back to bed, back to reality
Just fine.
bigstanhibbert
Well-Known Member
Is it worth it
A new winter coat and shoes for the wife
And a bicycle on the boy's birthday
It's just a rumour that was spread around town
By the women and children
Soon we'll be shipbuilding
Well I ask you
The boy said 'DAD THEY'RE GOING TO TAKE ME TO TASK
BUT I'LL BE BACK BY CHRISTMAS'
It's just a rumour that was spread around town
Somebody said that someone got filled in
For saying that people get killed in
The result of this shipbuilding
With all the will in the world
Diving for dear life
When we could be diving for pearls
It's just a rumour that was spread around town
A telegram or a picture postcard
Within weeks they'll be re-opening the shipyards
And notifying the next of kin
Once again
It's all we're skilled in
We will be shipbuilding
WITH ALL THE WILL IN THE WORLD
DIVING FOR DEAR LIFE
WHEN WE COULD BE DIVING FOR PEARLS
A new winter coat and shoes for the wife
And a bicycle on the boy's birthday
It's just a rumour that was spread around town
By the women and children
Soon we'll be shipbuilding
Well I ask you
The boy said 'DAD THEY'RE GOING TO TAKE ME TO TASK
BUT I'LL BE BACK BY CHRISTMAS'
It's just a rumour that was spread around town
Somebody said that someone got filled in
For saying that people get killed in
The result of this shipbuilding
With all the will in the world
Diving for dear life
When we could be diving for pearls
It's just a rumour that was spread around town
A telegram or a picture postcard
Within weeks they'll be re-opening the shipyards
And notifying the next of kin
Once again
It's all we're skilled in
We will be shipbuilding
WITH ALL THE WILL IN THE WORLD
DIVING FOR DEAR LIFE
WHEN WE COULD BE DIVING FOR PEARLS
bigstanhibbert
Well-Known Member
Nothin' for us in Belfast
The Pound's so old it's a pity
OK, there's the trident in Bangor
Then walk back to the city
We ain't got nothin' but they don't really care
They don't even know you know
Just want our money
And we can take it or leave it
What we need
An Alternative Ulster
Grab it and change it it's yours
Get an Alternative Ulster
Ignore the bores and their laws
Get an Alternative Ulster
Be an anti-security force
Alter your native Ulster
Alter your native land
Take a look where you're livin'
You got the Army on your street
And the RUC dog of repression
Is barking at your feet
Is this the kind of place you wanna live?
Is this where you wanna be?
Is this the only life we're gonna have?
What we need is
An Alternative Ulster
Grab it and change it it's yours
Get an Alternative Ulster
Ignore the bores and their laws
Get an Alternative Ulster
Be an anti-security force
Alter your native Ulster
Alter your native land
They say they're a part of you
But that's not true you know
They say they've got control of you
And that's a lie you know
They say you will never be
Free free free
Get an
Alternative Ulster
Alternative Ulster
Alternative Ulster
The Pound's so old it's a pity
OK, there's the trident in Bangor
Then walk back to the city
We ain't got nothin' but they don't really care
They don't even know you know
Just want our money
And we can take it or leave it
What we need
An Alternative Ulster
Grab it and change it it's yours
Get an Alternative Ulster
Ignore the bores and their laws
Get an Alternative Ulster
Be an anti-security force
Alter your native Ulster
Alter your native land
Take a look where you're livin'
You got the Army on your street
And the RUC dog of repression
Is barking at your feet
Is this the kind of place you wanna live?
Is this where you wanna be?
Is this the only life we're gonna have?
What we need is
An Alternative Ulster
Grab it and change it it's yours
Get an Alternative Ulster
Ignore the bores and their laws
Get an Alternative Ulster
Be an anti-security force
Alter your native Ulster
Alter your native land
They say they're a part of you
But that's not true you know
They say they've got control of you
And that's a lie you know
They say you will never be
Free free free
Get an
Alternative Ulster
Alternative Ulster
Alternative Ulster
PannickAtTheDisco
Well-Known Member
Nothin' for us in Belfast
The Pound's so old it's a pity
OK, there's the trident in Bangor
Then walk back to the city
We ain't got nothin' but they don't really care
They don't even know you know
Just want our money
And we can take it or leave it
What we need
An Alternative Ulster
Grab it and change it it's yours
Get an Alternative Ulster
Ignore the bores and their laws
Get an Alternative Ulster
Be an anti-security force
Alter your native Ulster
Alter your native land
Take a look where you're livin'
You got the Army on your street
And the RUC dog of repression
Is barking at your feet
Is this the kind of place you wanna live?
Is this where you wanna be?
Is this the only life we're gonna have?
What we need is
An Alternative Ulster
Grab it and change it it's yours
Get an Alternative Ulster
Ignore the bores and their laws
Get an Alternative Ulster
Be an anti-security force
Alter your native Ulster
Alter your native land
They say they're a part of you
But that's not true you know
They say they've got control of you
And that's a lie you know
They say you will never be
Free free free
Get an
Alternative Ulster
Alternative Ulster
Alternative Ulster
God save the Queen.
Nebuchadnezzar
Well-Known Member
This world is designed for crashing bores
bigstanhibbert
Well-Known Member
as in...