Joke thread

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[Fiftyyearsandcounting]

Back in the 80's, a car transporter pulls up out side the home of Nelson Mandela. The driver unloads 6 brand new Datsun Sunnys. Mandela rushes out of the house and asks the driver what the hells he's doing. The driver says "All I know is that when I arrived for work this morning, the boss said deliver these to Nelson Mandela", maybe they're a gift"
A furious Mandela calls the boss at the transport depot and demands to know what's going on. The boss explains "What a stupid driver, I told him to deliver the cars to Nissan Main Dealer"

 

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[fanatic1]

It's the late 70s - the punk era. In a rough punk club in Bradford a rough punk lad chats up a rough young tart and takes her back to his dog rough bedsit for a spell of hot sex action. After minimal foreplay they both strip off and just before the act he inserts a Sex Pistols tape to enhance the mood whilst simultaneously reaching for a condom

The music starts up.

She cries "Ere is that Johnny Rotten!"

He responds "Naw. I've only used it twice before"