How Would You Present Haaland To City Fans And To Football Fans Across The World?

Bring him onto the pitch with a bottle of champagne and a briefcase full of cash and just whip my cock out and bash one out whilst he does keepy uppies.
 
Just video edit the Sanchez piano video, but with Haaland taking an axe to it while Alexis sits in tears. Add Ten Hag into the background phoning his agent screaming for a private jet.

Nothing too flashy.
 
In a United shirt ,with this tune being played
It could have been you
It could have been you
You unlucky bastards
It could have been you

Erling is ours,Erling is ours ,fuck off back to London
Erling is ours
Slight edit.
It could never have been you.
 
Have Klopp, Ancelotti, Ten Haag, Nagelsmann all standing round and the music to Bullseye plays and a video of the late Jim Bowen saying, 'look at what you could have won'
 
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A brief 10 second video of him staggering out of Rusholme Chippy at 4 in the morning absolutely bladdered with kebab sauce all down his front slurring something that sounds like "fuck the scouse cunts!" whilst giving relentless V signs to the camera.
 
A parody of the Goonies with Phil, Jack, and Raz. Erling shows up at Sloth to save the day.
 
Call me old fashioned but I'd just have him come on the pitch with the rest of the team in the community shield vs Chelsea in Sept.
Then goes off injured for the rest of the season...
 

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