Merry Christmas!

Rough night. Been pissed off with City recently and turned in early depressed. Clock struck twelve and an eerie light filled the room and there in the corner was an unholy apparition which, on closer inspection. turned out to be Alan Ball. Taking me by the hand we flew back into the past where we saw Pleat dancing on the pitch, Arsenal taking the Mickey, City playing at York in front of a tiny group of away fans and a whole host of red devils pointing at me and laughing. Amazingly, at this point, the clock struck twelve again and a tall lugubrious figure with preternaturally wavy hair appeared in the bedroom barely audible but I could just make out the words "important" and "scoring goals". He slowly turned and pointed out of the window where we could see a league table with City in 3rd, a Champions League draw where we didn't get Barcelona, City getting drawn at home second in a two-legged semi final and a training session where Vinnie and Aguero were taking full part. Again the clock struck twelve and a smaller, darker Spanish-looking figure came into the room. The walls seemed to melt away and I found myself at a Champions League final. The game had finished the European Cup had sky blue and white ribbons on it, then it was held aloft by Messi and Aguero was holding the Ballon D'Or. Then came Giggs lifting his Sports Writer's Manager of the Year trophy for gaining promotion to League 1 with the newly merged United clubs, and the vista panned over 650 million peoples of the world wailing and gnashing their teeth whilst hordes of people clad in blue and white scarves shook their sides with laughter. I woke up in a sweat to find myself guffawing in my sleep, jumped out of bed, raised the sash window and shouted to a passing chav wearing a rag shirt; "what year is this", "2015" he replied. "Then fuck you and rag fans everywhere. Oh and Merry Christmas" I added as an afterthought. And from this day forward I'll be the happiest, clappiest, merriest, Blue of them all. And as Dickens probably said before his editor got hold of it, God bless Blues, every one.
 

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