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Not as stupid as some daft **** getting leathered and driving at 110mph though.

I'm just posting what I've heard from my beansprout planting chum in zee fatherland. He reckons it hangs on a Boateng switch. So if the deal goes tits up, I'm a dead man? I love the transfer forum, it's so laid back.

A steward at Bayern Munich of course.

Not a chance. Blatter will be in power until he wants to jack it in. He's like Baconface, but not as bent.

I am ITK on this one.You heard it here first. This kid is special. Just what we need. Attacking midfielder from Bayern Munich for those of you who've never heard of him.

I agree with Matt. It's definitely crooked.

Put the bins out beeeaatch!! It's gotta be your turn by now!!

Agreed, the only way he's going is in a hearse.

Brown-nosing twat.

Well now you're gonna have to work longer. No retiring at 60 now. Deal with it you lazy bitches.

Do people in Warrington really eat lobster??? I've only ever seen them eating Greggs or Chips 'n' Cheese.

He has left. He wandered out of his office and is now sat in the Bishops Blaize, necking double whiskies in a vain attempt to control his jazz-hands. He'll be back tomorrow though.

Mine has to be picking up dog-shit. That horrible stench penetrates my nostrils like a knife and the feeling of warm squidgy turd only separated by the thin coating of the little plastic bag is enough to make me want to vomit every single time I have to do it. Uuuuurrrgghhh!!

Hahaahaa so it is them. A real hire 'em fire 'em firm. Think twice if you're leaving a job to go there. If you're not working you've nothing to lose. Good luck.

If it's the company I'm thinking of, my advice is bin the app form, they are shysters.

Re: Need help with homewrok please help!! The people who can help you are at wrok at the moment. Good lukc.

Cheers Zin and Mamba, like I said its never cropped up but i'd hate for something so petty to affect anything I ever do. I had a 1 year working visa in Australia some years ago and put down that i had no criminal record, and it never came up or was never checked. Anyway cheers.

Congrats sir malcolm, well done. I've read this thread with interest because I have an offence from 20 years ago. I was on my mates 18th, and was walking up the street between pubs drinking a pint. 2 young cops stopped me. I got a bit lippy and was nicked and charged with "Theft of pint glass...

All the money raised tonight is going to Australian flood relief funds. Enjoy your night.

I've been over in Perth for a while. Been back a week now. Best wishes to everyone down under.