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Only because no touches Haaland does fuck all running to be in a position to be offside.

Balloon Arse. Made me chuckle that.

If we win it this season it will rank very high in Peps achievements.

OK explain this then. 79 mins...look at the headline. It's like we don't exist.

Well, I went for a stroll just the other day I called in at the paper shop and what did he say? He said, "Pay your bill 'cause you owe three weeks If you don't pay up, we're gonna break your knees" Are ya right or what? Are ya right or what? Talkin' to me mate the other night He says...

You coming down the chippy? Lyrical masterpiece.

Brooklands were the daddies mate. No-one ventured into the ghettos beyond Framingham Road. I once saw a kid deliberately barge into another kid which nearly caused him to stumble. It was horrible. His crime? Putting white pepper, not black, on his foie gras lunchtime snack. There's a reason the...

You'll never take The Broomwood..

Aaah the 105. Immortalised by The Bosnians. Lend us a fag Maxine, I'm gasping.

Yeah I get that mate. The thing is, you can commit to a SC, then the arse could fall out of you're world in an instant. Losing a job, illness, a family bereavement. A mate of mine always pays his SC up front, hates the never never, likes to plan his tight monthly budget. His only luxury in life...

A lot of people are sailing close to the wind financially, so might need it quicker, its that simple. If you think a multi-million pound company stringing along regular Joe for 45 days is a good look, then fair enough. Personally, I think its a piss take, but no more a piss take than every other...

Picture the scene tonight as Masters sits down in his cinema room to watch the news with his wife Mary. Quaffing a vintage port, Mary idly checking the Harrods website for ideas as to how to spend the latest £1000 gift card from those lovely people at the red cartel, the dog tucking into his...

"How's the 115 going r kid?" "Fake as Jordans tits Donald" "Yeah, the Middle East is full of 'em" "Ermm" "You should buy Gaza" "He's 58 ya daft twat"

Bit pissed and watching reruns of Ricky's fights. Excuse the late night ramble. That Hyde lad gave us some great nights to remember, but nothing comes close to the Vegas trip for the Mayweather fight. Imagine your best away trip and multiply it by 10 then add a few days to it. City everywhere...

Not missed any pens for us this season, but might be down to the fact that we haven't had any. Sly Sports take: Is Haalands poor record on penalties this season a worry for City? PS Guess who's top of the pens awarded stats?

Fuck me, only used to get a slice of orange at Metrovics.

Laughable mate but the thick twats keep pushing that narrative. Joe Hart rarely touched the ball but he'd always pull out a big save when called upon, which won us titles. ...unless it was low to his left ; )

Another hat-trick for Norway today. Only 4 hat-tricks behind Messi and fake Ron's International world record.

Tha That's amazing mate.

For me, we buried him yesterday.