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Probably the timer on their suicide vests.

I beg to differ. Simon Jordan isn't an empty vessel. He is full to the brim and overflowing with verbal shite.

Exactly, but this was in the days when journalism had credibility.

To be fair. They were promised a fat bare chested Geordie knocking shit out of a police horse.

They'd have to pay me £1 a month just to wipe my arse on the printed version.

Their bench will be worth more than the pile of shite sat on it.

What would Bert Trautman make of it? Although to be fair, in those days they had a bucket and a magic sponge.

Where's the black eyes?

Football Financial Investigative journalist? More like 'Inch High Private Eye'.

I think it's actually all things shortswashing. The shitty arsed little turd.

The rags are famous for these kind of negotiations though.

Agreed. It doesn't make it any less infuriating though.

It seems strange that Partay initiated contact last year by not playing the ball as Kevin was about to strike for goal. Result- no penalty. It's the inconsistencies of the decision making thats most annoying.

Be careful if you do. I slipped a disc trying that.

Correct. It's called Mane's Law.

He'll never wear pants again? Not unless they're the zebra variety. Wanker.

The leaked building plans do look impressive though, incorporating the ladies team. I think we need to be worried to be honest.

I used to go and watch my lad playing from time to time, and funnily enough he had a big ginger manager from the same mould. The only thing he used to shout was "TIME" for the whole 90 minutes. It was the only instruction he said for the entire game, apart from "warm up son" to one of the subs...

Is that because we were playing with the first ball?