24 Years of marriage and my wife has never once been on time

Never late for the doctors or personal trainer eh?
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I'm not exaggerating, she's literally been late for everything we've ever done. Sometimes it's just a minute or two but being on time is out of the question. We almost missed my brother's wedding because of her.

This past summer when we were on vacation I asked her if it would be possible for her to get ready first and be completely ready so that she could wait for me while I got ready and you'd have thought I told her I was having an affair. She was so mad that it ruined a whole day.

She is never late for doctor's appointments and makes her appointments with the personal trainer every week but if I need her to be somewhere at a certain time it's out of the question. When I bring it up she tells me that she "irons my shirts". I don't get it that ironing shirts gives you a free pass to make someone have to constantly wait for you for over 20 years. I'd be completely cool with getting my shirts done professionally if it meant that she'd show up on time even once.
Or you just get there too early.
 
As others have noticed, it's only you she's late for...

My missus takes a fucking age to get ready and I never notice any difference in what she looks like. This is kept to myself. I always insist she gets ready first, usually over an hour before I start. 20 mins tops for me and even then I'm waiting at the door, keys in hand, wondering what the fuck she's doing.
 
Suffered from this for years.
My wife takes it to the next level though. All my friends and family know what's she's like and purposely tell her an earlier time.
She is so bad, that she has all her clocks/watches set 20/25 mins fast. Even the clock in her car is set 15 mins ahead. This is fine for her as shes knows what they are set ahead by. Not so good for me when i forget and actually think i'm late for things. She reasons it helps her, but it doesn't seem to make any difference.
It started to affect the kids when they were getting detention for being late in the mornings. So i had to alter my work patterns to allow me to take them.
I remember a trip to Shell Island. The access road is tidal. I stressed and stressed to her that we had to leave the house by a certain time. Yep, she was busy fucking about with something at the last minute. I yelled up the stairs that "unlike the rest of the fucking world, the tide would NOT wait for her". Then somehow it was my fault that she was then in a bad mood for the rest of the trip...
 
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When we were all single, I was used to hitting the boozer for 7pm.
Meet up with the lads, have a few scoops then head for town about 8.30 - 9.00

She wont even start getting ready until 8.30 - 9.00.

Stormed out to the pub the first time she wasn't ready.

Nowadays, she picks me up from the pub!
 

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