Biggest bellend in football (with no connections to United or Liverpool)

John Motson.
Hung around the BBC, like a bad smell for far too long.
An egotistical, stat-obsessed bore, who sucked all the life out of the games he commentated on.
He was the forerunner of the statistics-based commentary we now get.
His favourite line was putting "I think" before yet another dull stat e.g. "I think Savage was on the books of MUFC" - knowing full well that the Welsh weasel had been released as a failure from the Class of '92.
Barry Davies ("look at his face") was far superior as a BBC commentator. Davies said far less than Motson, but captured the magic and fun of football. Unfortunately, Motson was perhaps seen as the safer option, getting the bigger matches over Barry Davies...
Know someone who organised ‘an evening with’ John Motson in Nottingham. Said he was a horrible **** and turned up absolutely wasted.
 
From such a rich seam of strong contenders it’s difficult to name just one. Kris Boyd leaps to mind up here. An inarticulate, bumbling, pathological bore, whose only merit for Sky Scotland, is his biased ramblings and overhyping of everything Rangers. He also provides so many laughs for us because of how much he fucks things up. His sad face, captured as routine now, has brightened up many an hour. Check out his on air masturbation session when Ramsay signed, which he equated with the second coming, and no I don’t mean his. Tragically for Kris, and to be fair, the rest of his fellow Rangers fans, the Ramsay affair was a gloriously tragic disaster for them, we fucking loved it. So, I would go for Boyd. On the other hand though, thick inarticulate people rarely get a job, let alone with Sky. Up here, you have to support the Gers, Boyd’s only qualification as a pundit up here. His sentences are painful to follow. If you understand what a sentence is.
 

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