Classic City jokes

[johnny on the spot]

Everyone remember the classics from the workplace and classroom?

- I hear Jamie Oliver's set to be the new City Manager...

- Really?

- ...apparently he's the only man who can make something decent out of Wanchope and ten cabbages.

How we laughed.

 

[gordondaviesmoustache]

Who can forget the Tommy Docherty classic about three types of stock: Chicken, Beef and light blue - laughing stock.

Having watched him at a few sportsmen's dinners, I can confirm that he is the funniest man I have ever seen in my life.

 

[BertTrautmann'sParachute]

Seen the colour of City's new kit? Green (with envy). Oh,how we laughed....<br /><br />-- Sun May 20, 2012 10:40 pm --<br /><br />

Who can forget the Tommy Docherty classic about three types of stock: Chicken, Beef and light blue - laughing stock.

Having watched him at a few sportsmen's dinners, I can confirm that he is the funniest man I have ever seen in my life.

Intentionally funny? Or funny peculiar?

 

[gordondaviesmoustache]

Seen the colour of City's new kit? Green (with envy). Oh,how we laughed....

-- Sun May 20, 2012 10:40 pm --

Who can forget the Tommy Docherty classic about three types of stock: Chicken, Beef and light blue - laughing stock.

Having watched him at a few sportsmen's dinners, I can confirm that he is the funniest man I have ever seen in my life.

Intentionally funny? Or funny peculiar?

No, just the most painfully unfunny **** of a human being I have ever met.

I was being somewhat sarcastic in my previous post. I thought you would have worked out my MO by now BTP ;-)

 

[rayray666]

Think it was Bernard Manning?

City have just had a new stand built, only problem is, all the seats are facing the pitch!

Hohoho!

 

[weeman19_89]

How I'd love to go back to that ... NOT!

 

[robsta]

My wife's side of the family are all rags (she isn't) and every sodding family do her Granddad or uncle would come over and say "hey have you heard City have got a new video out - 100 greatest corners". It wasn't funny the 1st time so why they thought I'd laugh the 3rd, 4th, ....10th red bastards !

 

[johnny on the spot]

What time is it?

 

[bananamilksheikh]

I rang Maine Road to ask what time kick off was?
they said "what time can you get here?

 

[johnny on the spot]

Five past Immel! Chortle chortle.

I love that we can laugh at ourselves like this, even the Scousers don't mind us.

 

[pinkwheeltrim]

Thieves broke into the Maine Road trophy room and were seen leaving with a sky blue carpet!


Why are there no kids at City games..........coz mums always tell them "don't go near that Maine Road!"




This was one my Uncle Mark (Leeds fan) made up himself......

Joe Royal and Baconface are being interviewed for the MEN.

Reporter: So Joe what are City's hopes for the season?
Joe: Well we really hope we get out of division 2.
Reporter: What about you Alex,what do the scum hope to achieve?
BF: "Well we want to win the Premier League,FA cup,Champions League,League cup and win every single game 5.0!"
Reporter: Don't you think that's asking a bit much?
BF: Well Joe started it!


Arf arf arf

 

[tommyhair]

Bernard Manning- They opened up City's trophy room the other day and Lord Lucan come riding out on Shergars back,

 

[tomhawley]

Bernard Manning- They opened up City's trophy room the other day and Lord Lucan come riding out on Shergars back,

Haha like that one

 

[Anteros]

Thieves broke into the Maine Road trophy room and were seen leaving with a sky blue carpet!


Why are there no kids at City games..........coz mums always tell them "don't go near that Maine Road!"




This was one my Uncle Mark (Leeds fan) made up himself......

Joe Royal and Baconface are being interviewed for the MEN.

Reporter: So Joe what are City's hopes for the season?
Joe: Well we really hope we get out of division 2.
Reporter: What about you Alex,what do the scum hope to achieve?
BF: "Well we want to win the Premier League,FA cup,Champions League,League cup and win every single game 5.0!"
Reporter: Don't you think that's asking a bit much?
BF: Well Joe started it!


Arf arf arf

You made me spill my drink!

 

[ifiwasarichfan]

Sometimes you can turn them around.

Last Season I was taunting Liverpool supporters at work with the Trophy Room Gag.

My punchline - "some Mickeys were seen running away with a sky Blue carpet, the FA Cup and a Champions League spot".

 

[ccr]

Big Mal gets a letter in the post 30 years after leaving. Its a bill for £20,000. When he asks why, he's told that he was the last person in the trophy room and he left the light on

 

[eastlands oasis]

Man City ave just signed a new Chinese manager Win One Soon

 

[gaudinho's stolen car]

The flight problems weren't down to an Icelandic earthquake a couple of years ago. Someone decided to beat the carpet in the trophy room at Eastlands.

 

[Laurent Charvet]

What's the difference between Manchester City and a teabag?

A teabag stays in the cup longer.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zyL6wPt-2TM[/youtube]

 

[Dave Ewing's Back 'eader]

Five past Immel! Chortle chortle.

I love that we can laugh at ourselves like this, even the Scousers don't mind us.

The biggest difference between footy fans and Rag bastards. The scarlet vermin, Dippers and MANUre, have never been able to laugh at themselves.