Dating apps

Psychedelic Casual said:
Feel for you mate. I don’t have kids but I’ve got mates who’ve split from their missus and they have kids together, and I saw it a lot with my mates when I was a kid.

Once you get used to the new situation I’m sure you’ll be alright and you’ll really appreciate the time you spend with your daughter. It’s something to look forward to in the in between times. Plus once you get into a routine in your own place you’ll really start to like it, trust me. The independence is refreshing!

Plus it will be easier to date when you have your own place.
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Thanks mate. Hopefully I will. Certainly the kids which is making this hard (one who is 20 but still lives here, the 15 year old and a 9 year old son...I mean I worship them and are very much hands on). It has been quite toxic to be fair and I'm sure it's just down to the rules of love and war as I don't think anyone would think of us as bad people separately.
Aye...the dating thing will be easier (when I finally get that mojo back). I've been living on the sofa bed for 2 years, hardly a call to romance with potential dates in all fairness...
 
somapop said:
Thanks mate. Hopefully I will. Certainly the kids which is making this hard (one who is 20 but still lives here, the 15 year old and a 9 year old son...I mean I worship them and are very much hands on). It has been quite toxic to be fair and I'm sure it's just down to the rules of love and war as I don't think anyone would think of us as bad people separately.
Aye...the dating thing will be easier (when I finally get that mojo back). I've been living on the sofa bed for 2 years, hardly a call to romance with potential dates in all fairness...
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I’ll be interested to see how things turn out for you in six months or so fella. Hope it goes well! And hope you get that mojo back n’all haha
 
somapop said:
Exactly like me....these past two years I've got fitter than I've ever been and my confidence higher than ever (though I'm historically coming from a low shy point!).
However, over Christmas it's all hit me again. Despite splitting two years ago we've all lived together co parenting (for a variety of reasons really, one is the fact we have an autistic daughter which takes up a lot of energy!) but I'm probably (finally) going to be moving out of the next couple of weeks and I've gone rock bottom again (not that anyone would guess as I still appear cheery and I'm at the gym with daughter every day). Always thought I'd be far happier on my own...but I think the reality may be different and I'm getting very agitated and melonacholic of the loneliness)...the kids more than anything (though I'll be a five-10 minute walk away hopefully and with access to the family home whenever).
Maybe I just have to hold on tight and get through it. I could obviously never have another relationship whilst living here (though my ex is over 18 months into a new relationship) - that was clear from the tinder dates I had, sadly.
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I went through it when 30 and it does get easier. The loneliness can be hard at times as it can for anyone but I found keeping busy with work and hobbies kept me from thinking too much.
 
Thanks folks...it's been coming for some time and as much as I like my own company, the silence of my kids not being around is going to be pretty painful. But this is the wrong thread for all this - apologies.
 
Psychedelic Casual said:
Yes very independent, and yes also selfish mate haha

And I agree about the novelty of a good shag wearing off, being with someone I don’t really want to be with because we had fun shagging for six months drags you down. That’s happened a few times.

Relationships are disposable these days. People don’t want to work to fix things. That’s no good if for someone who can’t be on their own but I think I’m alright when I’m on my own so don’t feel too lost about it. I actually appreciate the times I’m alone.
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I don't get it. You're single, so why have one relationship at a time?

I'm married now, but I when I was single I was like a dog on heat with all with that lovely free pussy everywhere (it also helped that I worked on the door at the time!)! I super miss my single days, although I do like being married.

I have a smile every now and then about my past enjoyable shenanigans (had 4 or 5 on the go at one point, ended up in a disaster!)

But if this relationship broke down I wouldn't commit ever again!!

;)
 
Psychedelic Casual said:
I think there are people who are evolutionarily conditioned to have a mate they procreate with and stay together with their offspring for strength in numbers for safety and the progression of the species.

Then there are people who evolutionarily conditioned to be lone wolves, who don’t tie themselves down to one person and/or one place.

These things will be tens of thousands of years old in the evolutionary lineage. However our society puts expectations on people that makes everyone think that they should find a partner and settle down. People who don’t are often asked “why haven’t you settled down yet?” / “have you not found anyone yet?” and then people start to get complexes, succumb to stress and anxiety about it, and even depression. Or they get desperate. Or they just settle and live miserably just to conform to society’s expectations.

Thankfully I don’t put that expectation on myself and I don’t feel the need to actively search for it. As I’ve said, if it happens it happens.
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Ha!

I should have read on!!

Fair play, kidda!
 
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