Garth Crooks' Team of the Week

kippaxwarrior said:
Hes definitely on a wind-up now. He wants Schmeichel to be considered as player of the season as he made 2 saves on Saturday. He also claims because we have a Champions League Final we cant have champagne for breakfast, lunch and tea. Like Pep would like the players do that anyway

What.The.Actual.Fuck?
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The cup final on a freebie is probably the only full/live games he's seen, like his pants, cut the fat fucker some slack.
 
The thing about Garth Crooks is that he’s a very lonely man... he lives alone, has no friends, talks to himself in his strangely affected accent and watches match of the day with the sound off so he can pretend to be the incisive and knowledgeable pundit - he deeply wishes he was. He is after all the victim of an era where he was the token BAME presenter on the Beeb - hired as a token regardless of the fact he knows nothing... he’s not a journalist, he’s no tactician -you can see from a mile off that other BBC employees think he’s an absolute arse - which is an understatement. In Garth’s lonely world of all day subbuteo tournaments and days where he swaps Panini stickers with himself his first attempt at team of the week has him in all 11 positions but slowly over the weekend he selects names from his 2020/21 Premier League sticker collection based on their performance in the last weeks subbuteo tournaments. Garth‘s team of the week is a meaningless pile of drivel to the wider public... but to Garth it’s the culmination of an exciting week in his sad lonely world.... he’s replayed the FA Cup Final 4 times already and Leicester have won each time but Garth has scored the winner on each occasion....
 
nmc said:
Oh yes - and proof that if you blow enough smoke up your own arse your head will inflate to the point it almost explodes

View attachment 17093
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In Partridge voice.... ‘Lynne, idea for a late night round the table discussion group. Garth Crooks, Nick Faldo and Christopher Livingstone Eubank discuss topics with the one who can sound most self important, informed and intelligent winning the debate.... might need to schedule a three day slot per episode and put Ofcom on standby.’
ive posted before on Crooks. I once met him on on an assignment. He is a grade one shithouse and well described by many posters on here.
 
kippaxwarrior said:
Hes definitely on a wind-up now. He wants Schmeichel to be considered as player of the season as he made 2 saves on Saturday. He also claims because we have a Champions League Final we cant have champagne for breakfast, lunch and tea. Like Pep would like the players do that anyway

What.The.Actual.Fuck?
Click to expand...
I'm surprised that he did not give Allison the keeper spot as he scored a goal.
The champagne remark was more a comment on the dippers lack of professionalism last season than a dig at us.
He is a git though.
 
kippaxwarrior said:
Hes definitely on a wind-up now. He wants Schmeichel to be considered as player of the season as he made 2 saves on Saturday. He also claims because we have a Champions League Final we cant have champagne for breakfast, lunch and tea. Like Pep would like the players do that anyway

What.The.Actual.Fuck?
Click to expand...
There’s no doubt that those two saves by Rudolph jnr. were absolutely fantastic, but PotY because of them? What a fucking joke!
 
nmc said:
The thing about Garth Crooks is that he’s a very lonely man... he lives alone, has no friends, talks to himself in his strangely affected accent and watches match of the day with the sound off so he can pretend to be the incisive and knowledgeable pundit - he deeply wishes he was. He is after all the victim of an era where he was the token BAME presenter on the Beeb - hired as a token regardless of the fact he knows nothing... he’s not a journalist, he’s no tactician -you can see from a mile off that other BBC employees think he’s an absolute arse - which is an understatement. In Garth’s lonely world of all day subbuteo tournaments and days where he swaps Panini stickers with himself his first attempt at team of the week has him in all 11 positions but slowly over the weekend he selects names from his 2020/21 Premier League sticker collection based on their performance in the last weeks subbuteo tournaments. Garth‘s team of the week is a meaningless pile of drivel to the wider public... but to Garth it’s the culmination of an exciting week in his sad lonely world.... he’s replayed the FA Cup Final 4 times already and Leicester have won each time but Garth has scored the winner on each occasion....
Click to expand...
Has he got a bucket friend called Stephen Tatlock?
 
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