joke thread....

Discussion in 'Off Topic' started by citymantop, 28 Jan 2014.

  1. East Level 2

    East Level 2

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    This could be worse than starting "Give us a B" at Borussia Park.
     
  2. DazWA9

    DazWA9

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    I was shopping with my wife earlier when she looked at me and said " You are a right lazy bastard you "

    I was so shocked I nearly fell out of the fucking trolley....
     
    kippax4ever and LWashington like this.
  3. jimharri

    jimharri

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    I've just been to Tesco’s and seen a bloke buying 4 crates of San Miguel, 5 paellas and 3 sombreros and I thought to myself..........

    Hispanic buying.
     

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  4. Worst advice I ever got as a kid was “Eat all your food so you grow big and strong”. After years of over-eating I’m now a fat cunt : /
     
  5. flyer

    flyer

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    I haven't worked out how bottles 'hang' on a wall, they sit on a wall don't they? And you're asking what bastard colour they are!!
     
  6. EastStandLower

    EastStandLower

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    I just turned down a job at my local fruit and veg shop.
    They offered to pay me in vegetables, but the celery was unacceptable.
     
    mikemcfc likes this.
  7. PannickAtTheDisco

    PannickAtTheDisco

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    VAR review, you forgot the umlaut!
     
  8. East Level 2

    East Level 2

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    In the words of the song: Fuck VAR, Fuck VAR, Fuck VAR.
    Anyway, the umlaut isn't over the "o" in Borussia.
    But I'm building up tö yet anöther blöödy day wörking fröm höme sö here is a cöllectiön of umlauts.
     
  9. Fred_Quimby

    Fred_Quimby

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    “My husband purchased a world map - gave me a dart and said “throw this and wherever it lands I’m taking you on holiday when this pandemic is over”. Turns out we’re spending two weeks behind the fridge”
     
  10. PannickAtTheDisco

    PannickAtTheDisco

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    Borussia Verein für Leibesübungen 1900 e.V. Mönchengladbach
     

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