Joke thread

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@DazWA9 If you are going to nick a 'joke' from twitter or similar and pretend it is your own, at least have the decency to check half a page back to check that it has not already been posted. We are trying to maintain some standards here, admittedly we are failing but you are not helping one little bit.

I didn’t realise there was any semblance of a standard on this thread. There you go, you learn something new every day.

Tha old school report ‘Sets a low standard and fails to achieve it’.
 
Plane crashes and a bloke ends up washing up on a desert island with a pig and a dog. After a few days hes gets horny and decides to try and mount the pig. As he goes to take down his trousers the dog starts to get aggressive towards him so he thinks fuck it and pulls his pants back up. A few more days pass and he gets even more horny and tries to give the pig another go but the dog gets aggressive again. A fews weeks pass and the bloke looks into the ocean and sees a woman screaming for help, he swims out and brings ger to safety. She says to him ‘how can i repay you, ill do anything, anything at all you name it ill do it’ he replies.. ‘you couldnt take that fucking dog for a walk for 10 minutes could ya’
 
Plane crashes and a bloke ends up washing up on a desert island with a pig and a dog. After a few days hes gets horny and decides to try and mount the pig. As he goes to take down his trousers the dog starts to get aggressive towards him so he thinks fuck it and pulls his pants back up. A few more days pass and he gets even more horny and tries to give the pig another go but the dog gets aggressive again. A fews weeks pass and the bloke looks into the ocean and sees a woman screaming for help, he swims out and brings ger to safety. She says to him ‘how can i repay you, ill do anything, anything at all you name it ill do it’ he replies.. ‘you couldnt take that fucking dog for a walk for 10 minutes could ya’
Sounds familiar, this one.
 

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