Life as a single

[neel]

36 now , feels really tough to find woman with whom I am confident I will be able to be for rest of my life . At crossroads of thinking even I should keep looking for marriage options or stay single. Any singles in our group and how’s life been in your 40s , 50s and above ? Any regrets, any advices ? Do you feel lonely sometimes and how do you cope with it ?

 

[Bournemouth Blue]

It took me a long time to find a woman, then a woman seemed obsessed with me. (I was nearly 30 by then). I was lonely so I went for it, despite reservations because it didn’t feel right. In my haste it was a huge mistake, we stayed 18 years in an unhappy marriage. She did make me laugh but she had a short fuse and was unfaithful. The two years after divorce were horrible, I was in my late forties and had a few dates with widows and divorcees, and they all seemed very demanding, emotionally and financially. I was all-but resigned to spending the rest of my days as a single man, but then I met a lovely lady quite by chance and we hit it off right away. We were in a group and it hadn’t occurred to either of us, but we had both been given hints by others in the group that “she’s the one” and “he’s the one”. We have been an item since Easter 2001 and married since 2003, and I found a job and moved to Bournemouth in 2002. My advice is not to try too hard, but join a group you are interested in, and it might just happen like it did for me. Good luck mate!

 

[BlueHammer85]

I know the feeling , and felt like everyone around me was having kids or getting married etc, honestly it will come, don’t dwell on it and keep trying. You’ll find the right one.

 

[Deepest Blue]

Keep a smile on your face and never show any desperation. A good lass will come your way.

Above all, if you find one that you like communicate and listen!

 

[Boo or Boo-urns]

Neil McCauley: "I’m a needle starting at zero going the other way. Then, all of a sudden…
someone like you comes along.”

Heat (1995)

 

[MadchesterCity]

36 now , feels really tough to find woman with whom I am confident I will be able to be for rest of my life . At crossroads of thinking even I should keep looking for marriage options or stay single. Any singles in our group and how’s life been in your 40s , 50s and above ? Any regrets, any advices ? Do you feel lonely sometimes and how do you cope with it ?

There is a new app call grinder, worth a look

 

[I'm With Stupid]

What worked for me was putting more deliberate effort in. I always found stuff like Tinder to be pretty bad because it's difficult to tell whether there's any chemistry from a short chat, and then you turn up to the date, and she's perfectly nice, but you can just tell from the start that you're not really into each other. What I did, was just make a massively conscious effort to increase my circle of friends by saying yes to more invites. This then allows you to feel people out in a scenario with less pressure and only ask them out if there's a spark.

It helped that I was doing this over Christmas and New Year, because it meant that people were having house parties quite regularly, and within a month I'd met my wife. Saw her at a new friend's birthday party, thought she was hot, got chatting, swapped numbers and asked her out a few days later over text. And then the first date is less awkward because you've actually got shit to talk about.

 

[RACHACE]

Looking for marriage options? Sounds a bit intense that fella.

Relax and make the most of whatever situation that you find yourself in today, tomorrow or in 5-10 years time.

Nowt wrong with being single at whatever age.

 

[Stiff Little Wingers]

I know the feeling , and felt like everyone around me was having kids or getting married etc, honestly it will come, don’t dwell on it and keep trying. You’ll find the right one.

Yes. Be true to yourself and it will happen. It did for me at 35 and its our silver anniversary next year

 

[117 M34]

I've got one you can have