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Office Romances
- Thread starter oman0115
- Start date
liamctid
Well-Known Member
When I moved back to Manchester 5 years ago I got a job in Trafford Park, started on the Monday, moved in to my flat on the Wednesday and had a work night out on the Friday.
Dipped my pen in company ink on the Friday with Emma who was soon to move out of sales and into marketing back at my new flat (Christened it). She seemed pretty keen, went on all week about coming back to hers this time on the following Friday night. Went out on the Friday night and she said "can we go back to my mates before we go back to mine" - didn't know it was bloke mates who were some right gorps - she walked to the kitchen and 2 of them threw eggs at her. I thought they were pricks so I launched the batteries out of their sky remote in the living room.
Left the mates, went back to hers, her room was a fucking tip (why ask me to come back all week and not ensure the sheet is on all four sides?) shagged her despite there being remains of egg shell in her hair.
Kept my distance after that.
Dipped my pen in company ink on the Friday with Emma who was soon to move out of sales and into marketing back at my new flat (Christened it). She seemed pretty keen, went on all week about coming back to hers this time on the following Friday night. Went out on the Friday night and she said "can we go back to my mates before we go back to mine" - didn't know it was bloke mates who were some right gorps - she walked to the kitchen and 2 of them threw eggs at her. I thought they were pricks so I launched the batteries out of their sky remote in the living room.
Left the mates, went back to hers, her room was a fucking tip (why ask me to come back all week and not ensure the sheet is on all four sides?) shagged her despite there being remains of egg shell in her hair.
Kept my distance after that.
PannickAtTheDisco
Well-Known Member
When I moved back to Manchester 5 years ago I got a job in Trafford Park, started on the Monday, moved in to my flat on the Wednesday and had a work night out on the Friday.
Dipped my pen in company ink on the Friday with Emma who was soon to move out of sales and into marketing back at my new flat (Christened it). She seemed pretty keen, went on all week about coming back to hers this time on the following Friday night. Went out on the Friday night and she said "can we go back to my mates before we go back to mine" - didn't know it was bloke mates who were some right gorps - she walked to the kitchen and 2 of them threw eggs at her. I thought they were pricks so I launched the batteries out of their sky remote in the living room.
Left the mates, went back to hers, her room was a fucking tip (why ask me to come back all week and not ensure the sheet is on all four sides?) shagged her despite there being remains of egg shell in her hair.
Kept my distance after that.
Her mates were clearly just egging you on.
Magicpole
Well-Known Member
Leave him alone, poor cunts got enough on his plate. He does know the score though.Didn't know you and Magicpole were an item.
Whichonespink
Well-Known Member
- Joined
- 13 May 2012
- Messages
- 652
That comment cracked me upHer mates were clearly just egging you on.
Saxmundham Blue
Well-Known Member
When I moved back to Manchester 5 years ago I got a job in Trafford Park, started on the Monday, moved in to my flat on the Wednesday and had a work night out on the Friday.
Dipped my pen in company ink on the Friday with Emma who was soon to move out of sales and into marketing back at my new flat (Christened it). She seemed pretty keen, went on all week about coming back to hers this time on the following Friday night. Went out on the Friday night and she said "can we go back to my mates before we go back to mine" - didn't know it was bloke mates who were some right gorps - she walked to the kitchen and 2 of them threw eggs at her. I thought they were pricks so I launched the batteries out of their sky remote in the living room.
Left the mates, went back to hers, her room was a fucking tip (why ask me to come back all week and not ensure the sheet is on all four sides?) shagged her despite there being remains of egg shell in her hair.
Kept my distance after that.
"shagged her despite there being remains of egg shell in her hair."
Some tea just came out of my nose when I read that. Hats off to you sir!!
Tuearts right boot
Well-Known Member
The wife and me had split up although we were still living together as the house sale was going through.
A woman from the offices upstairs came down and wanted to hire a van, no problem....she needed someone to help her with 2 wardrobes....no problem, I was still being rewarded for my efforts for a couple of months after that.
Fast forward a few months....all sorted on the house sale but my head was in bits, head office offered to buy me out as they wanted an airport location. Sorted, new staff and a brand new computor system. A few mornings later the manageress from our Derby branch turned up to install it and take me through it.......BY dinner time we were in the Farmers Arms......This carried on for a few weeks as strangly enough I couldn't get my head around the system. The christmas do kicked it off although a couple of the directors had an idea what was going on. She was married but having a rough time of it and although it went against my principles ...well a mans got to do etc etc. She was a tap dancer and looked like Paula Abdul ( younguns...google will be your friend ) To cut a long story short she wanted an affair but I suppose I was after something long term and obviously she wasn't prepared for that.
Not long after that I got a phone call out of the blue, an ex girlfriend from college who was living in the States. Several trips across the pond and a couple of road trips later I realised she was a fruitcake and after me demanding she dropped me off at Miami airport, that was it. Until she turned up at my house unannounced a year or so later to be be met by my now wife (#2) telling her " do you know who I am...." that didn't go down too well and I had some explaining to do.
Wierd creatures, all of them...
My dad once told me that life really does start at 40, he wasn't wrong, bless him.
A woman from the offices upstairs came down and wanted to hire a van, no problem....she needed someone to help her with 2 wardrobes....no problem, I was still being rewarded for my efforts for a couple of months after that.
Fast forward a few months....all sorted on the house sale but my head was in bits, head office offered to buy me out as they wanted an airport location. Sorted, new staff and a brand new computor system. A few mornings later the manageress from our Derby branch turned up to install it and take me through it.......BY dinner time we were in the Farmers Arms......This carried on for a few weeks as strangly enough I couldn't get my head around the system. The christmas do kicked it off although a couple of the directors had an idea what was going on. She was married but having a rough time of it and although it went against my principles ...well a mans got to do etc etc. She was a tap dancer and looked like Paula Abdul ( younguns...google will be your friend ) To cut a long story short she wanted an affair but I suppose I was after something long term and obviously she wasn't prepared for that.
Not long after that I got a phone call out of the blue, an ex girlfriend from college who was living in the States. Several trips across the pond and a couple of road trips later I realised she was a fruitcake and after me demanding she dropped me off at Miami airport, that was it. Until she turned up at my house unannounced a year or so later to be be met by my now wife (#2) telling her " do you know who I am...." that didn't go down too well and I had some explaining to do.
Wierd creatures, all of them...
My dad once told me that life really does start at 40, he wasn't wrong, bless him.
True story.Leave him alone, poor cunts got enough on his plate. He does know the score though.
Bigga
Well-Known Member
When I moved back to Manchester 5 years ago I got a job in Trafford Park, started on the Monday, moved in to my flat on the Wednesday and had a work night out on the Friday.
Dipped my pen in company ink on the Friday with Emma who was soon to move out of sales and into marketing back at my new flat (Christened it). She seemed pretty keen, went on all week about coming back to hers this time on the following Friday night. Went out on the Friday night and she said "can we go back to my mates before we go back to mine" - didn't know it was bloke mates who were some right gorps - she walked to the kitchen and 2 of them threw eggs at her. I thought they were pricks so I launched the batteries out of their sky remote in the living room.
Left the mates, went back to hers, her room was a fucking tip (why ask me to come back all week and not ensure the sheet is on all four sides?) shagged her despite there being remains of egg shell in her hair.
Kept my distance after that.
Hate sex is awesome!!
Uncle Wally One Ball
Well-Known Member
Good work SirWhen I moved back to Manchester 5 years ago I got a job in Trafford Park, started on the Monday, moved in to my flat on the Wednesday and had a work night out on the Friday.
Dipped my pen in company ink on the Friday with Emma who was soon to move out of sales and into marketing back at my new flat (Christened it). She seemed pretty keen, went on all week about coming back to hers this time on the following Friday night. Went out on the Friday night and she said "can we go back to my mates before we go back to mine" - didn't know it was bloke mates who were some right gorps - she walked to the kitchen and 2 of them threw eggs at her. I thought they were pricks so I launched the batteries out of their sky remote in the living room.
Left the mates, went back to hers, her room was a fucking tip (why ask me to come back all week and not ensure the sheet is on all four sides?) shagged her despite there being remains of egg shell in her hair.
Kept my distance after that.