Scouse bohemian rhapsody

M M

mancity89

Well-Known Member
Joined
30 Oct 2008
Messages
2,279
Just had this e-mailed to me

Even had to put a dig in on us aswell

Liverpudlian Rhapsody (to the tune of Bohemian Rhapsody)

Is this our Stevie?
Captain of LFC?
Arrested in Southport
All caught on CCTV.
Open "The Sun"
It's there on Page One, you'll see.
I'm just a Scouser
I need some help
Because I'm Huyton-born, Huyton-bred
Once a Blue, now a Red.
Whatever the truth is, it doesn't really matter to me.

[Piano: Dumm di dum dum, dumm di dum dum]

Rafa! It's Stevie here.
I've just t*watted a DJ
And they've taken him away.
Rafa, we were four points clear
But now I fear we'll throw it all away!
Rafa! Ooooooooooh.
Didn't mean to make you sigh
If I'm not back in time to play at Preston Tinker on, tinker on, my
career is all in tatters....

[Piano: Dum di dum di dum, dum di dum di dum]

Too late! It's Walton Jail.
I don't think that I can cope
I can't bend down for the soap.
Goodbye everybody - I've got to go
Gotta leave the Kop behind and face the Bench.
Rafa! Ooooooooooo! (Anyway the sh*it blows) I don't want to go to jail I
sometimes wish I'd never joined Liverpoo-ool!

[Piano, guitar and stuff]

I see a little silhouetto of Hamman
There's more dosh, there's more dosh if I sign for Man City But joining
such a sh*ite team is very very frightening to me

Calling Barry
(It's Rick Parry)
Calling Barry
(It's Rick Parry)
Calling Barry! He's Magnific-o-o-o-o

I'm just a poor boy from a Scouse family He's just a poor boy from a
Scouse family Spare him his job says Co-Coach Sammy Lee

Piano: Tinkle, tinkle tinkle

Easy come easy go! Will you let me go?
It's me, La!
No! We will not let you go! Let him go!
It's me, La!
No! We will not let you go! Let him go!
No no no no no no!
Rafa! Sammy! Rafa! Sammy! Rafa! Sammy! Get me out!
A Big House con has a shower set aside for me! For meee!

For meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

[Big Guitar Riff]

So you think you can say my career's in decline!
So you think you can suggest my kids are not mine!
Oh DJ! Can't do this to me DJ!
Just gotta get out! Just gotta get right outta here!

[More guitar and then the slow bit]

My career is now in tatters
Anyone can see
Nothing really matters! Nothing really matters to me!

Anyway the sh*it blows!

[Cymbal: pish]
 
mancity89 said:
Just had this e-mailed to me

Even had to put a dig in on us aswell

Liverpudlian Rhapsody (to the tune of Bohemian Rhapsody)

Is this our Stevie?
Captain of LFC?
Arrested in Southport
All caught on CCTV.
Open "The Sun"
It's there on Page One, you'll see.
I'm just a Scouser
I need some help
Because I'm Huyton-born, Huyton-bred
Once a Blue, now a Red.
Whatever the truth is, it doesn't really matter to me.

[Piano: Dumm di dum dum, dumm di dum dum]

Rafa! It's Stevie here.
I've just t*watted a DJ
And they've taken him away.
Rafa, we were four points clear
But now I fear we'll throw it all away!
Rafa! Ooooooooooh.
Didn't mean to make you sigh
If I'm not back in time to play at Preston Tinker on, tinker on, my
career is all in tatters....

[Piano: Dum di dum di dum, dum di dum di dum]

Too late! It's Walton Jail.
I don't think that I can cope
I can't bend down for the soap.
Goodbye everybody - I've got to go
Gotta leave the Kop behind and face the Bench.
Rafa! Ooooooooooo! (Anyway the sh*it blows) I don't want to go to jail I
sometimes wish I'd never joined Liverpoo-ool!

[Piano, guitar and stuff]

I see a little silhouetto of Hamman
There's more dosh, there's more dosh if I sign for Man City But joining
such a sh*ite team is very very frightening to me

Calling Barry
(It's Rick Parry)
Calling Barry
(It's Rick Parry)
Calling Barry! He's Magnific-o-o-o-o

I'm just a poor boy from a Scouse family He's just a poor boy from a
Scouse family Spare him his job says Co-Coach Sammy Lee

Piano: Tinkle, tinkle tinkle

Easy come easy go! Will you let me go?
It's me, La!
No! We will not let you go! Let him go!
It's me, La!
No! We will not let you go! Let him go!
No no no no no no!
Rafa! Sammy! Rafa! Sammy! Rafa! Sammy! Get me out!
A Big House con has a shower set aside for me! For meee!

For meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

[Big Guitar Riff]

So you think you can say my career's in decline!
So you think you can suggest my kids are not mine!
Oh DJ! Can't do this to me DJ!
Just gotta get out! Just gotta get right outta here!

[More guitar and then the slow bit]

My career is now in tatters
Anyone can see
Nothing really matters! Nothing really matters to me!

Anyway the sh*it blows!

[Cymbal: pish]
Click to expand...
who composed it , pete boyle.
 
The Glaswegian version is much better.

MP3 version: <a class="postlink" href="http://www.glasgowsurvival.co.uk/belters/01.wma" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;">http://www.glasgowsurvival.co.uk/belters/01.wma</a>

Is this the real life, is it the methadone?
Stuck in Maryhill, two bob fur the telephone?
Open yer wine an' talk wi' a whine like me.
Um just a weeji, gie us yer Sunny D.
Cos I'll chib yer pal, rip yer Da; slash yer dug, ride yer ma!
Any way the Clyde flows Disnae really matter tae me......tae me.

Haw Maw, just chibbed some c**t,
Buckie bottle tae the heid,
An noo the f**kin' b*****d's deid!
Haw Maw, Um just oan parole,
An noo I'm headin straight back tae Bar-L.

Haw Maw, ooh oohooh ooh,
Never meant tae steal yer purse,
But if I'm no fu' o' smack this time the morra'.
Carry oot, carry oot!
An we'll go oot oan the batter!

Too late, the bailiff's here,
Sends shivers doon ma spine,
Gubbed 10 jellies just in time.
Goodbye all ma muckers, I've got tae go,
Got tae go and rip some wank fae up the scheme.
Haw Maw ooh oooooh ooh
I'm a jakey bam, I sometimes think I've nivir been washed at all.

I see a little silhouetto of a bam,
Adidas! Adidas! Can ye get us a kergo?
Thunderbird, White Lightning, very very frightning tae me!
Twenty Mayfair, Twenty Mayfair, Twenty Mayfair and some skins,
Magnifico oh oh oh oh!

I'm just a fat boy, nae c**t loves me,
He's just a fat boy fae a fat family!
Spare us a quid fur a wee cup o tea?
Get tae f**k, skanky slob, will ye get a joab?
Forfucksake, No! I will no' git a joab! - Get a joab!
Forfucksake, I will no' git a joab! - Get a joab!
Forfucksake, Will you git a joab? - Get a joab!
Will no' git a joab, get a joab!
Will no' git a joab, get a joab!
No, no, no, no, no, no, no.....

Oh gonorrhoea! gonorrhoea! gonorrhoea and the clap!
Then doon the pub, has the barman put aside for me? For me, for meeeee!?

So you 'hink ye kin slash me and P**s in my eye?
So ye 'hink ye kin chib me an' leave me tae die?
Haw bawbag, can't dae this tae me bawbag!
Just wait till I'm oot, just wait till I'm right oot ma nut!

f**k all really matters,
Any c**t kin see,
f**k all really matters, f**k all really matters tae me!
Click to expand...
 
Have you heard the Cantonian Rhapsody as well?

Is this the Moss Side? Or is it fantasy?
Taught by the lies from Matt Busby's Theatre of Dreams
Open your eyes, look right through the lies and see
He's just a french git
deserving no sympathy
Because he's hit them high
hit them low
Karate kick or body blow
Anyway the sod goes doesn't really matter to me
to me.
Mamma, just kicked a man
put my studs in his chest
Then I slapped him round the head
My career had only just begun
But now I've gone and thrown it all away.
Mama, je suis merde, didn't mean to blow my top
If I piss off to Spain some time tomorrow,
Carry on, carry on, 'cos ze Mancs don't really matter.
Lately I have done wrong
Thats what I tell the press.
But I really couldn't care less
Goodbye everybody, I'm due in court
But by the start of October I'll be back
Mama ooooooo
I don't wanna sign
I sometimes wish I'd never left
France at all.
I see a little leather jacket on a man
Sacre bleu! Sacre bleu! I will kick his ****ing head in!
Adidas and Nike might take all those ads off me
Manchestero (Manchestero)
Manchestero (Manchestero)
Manchestero, I've got to go (so pay me moooooooooore)
I'm just a french boy, nobody loves me
(He's just a french boy from a french family, can't blame the parents
for this monstrosity)
Easy come, easy go - a red card you will show
Referee? NOOO!
You must not send me off! (send him off)
Referee?
He's going to send me off (send him off)
Referee? He's gone and sent me off (sent him off)
I'll have my early bath (early bath)
Another early bath (early bath)
NON! NON! NON! NON! NON! NON! NON!
Man United Man United Man United will not let me go
Dementio has a pay rise put aside for me, for me, for meeeeee
yes I think I can kick them and spit in their eye
Yes I know they hate me and I don't care why
Oh baby, I would like to join AC
I'd like to sign, I'd like to sign for Milano
Nothing really matters, anyone can see
None of all this matters, nothing really matters to me.
Anywhere that pays well...
 
The Bluemoon mix

Iv'e got NO real life, its all just fantasy,
To many transfers...and to few with realities.
Open a thread.....Itsssss Kakaaaaa then Bellamyyyy.
I'm just a blue boy, but I've got a F5 key.
cause I'm logging on, then logging out
two hours kip all forrrrr nowt!!!

Hit me with a transfer, this windows really getting....to meeeee!!



Oh City just sign someone
does'nt have to be that a great,
so I can discuss him with blue mates.
City not just anyone, but someone who can blow us all away.

Bluemoon uweuwhuuuu ...your killing my sex life,........ its made NO difference for the wife :(

Carrington Carrington It really bloody matters!!

Its to late,
migraines all the time.
Im addicted to this screen.
ITKs slipping who they've seen,

Good BUYS Mr Hughes,
not just anyone.
They've got to want to do it home and away!!

Oh Bluemoon uweeehuuuu ...I haven't got NO life,

But I'll be back again this time tomorrow...What a carry on
Carry on...because it really matters?




...I think I will just check the transfer page!!!!!!!!!!!!
 
Petetheblu said:
The Bluemoon mix

Iv'e got NO real life, its all just fantasy,
To many transfers...and to few with realities.
Open a thread.....Itsssss Kakaaaaa then Bellamyyyy.
I'm just a blue boy, but I've got a F5 key.
cause I'm logging on, then logging out
two hours kip all forrrrr nowt!!!

Hit me with a transfer, this windows really getting....to meeeee!!



Oh City just sign someone
does'nt have to be that a great,
so I can discuss him with blue mates.
City not just anyone, but someone who can blow us all away.

Bluemoon uweuwhuuuu ...your killing my sex life,........ its made NO difference for the wife :(

Carrington Carrington It really bloody matters!!

Its to late,
migraines all the time.
Im addicted to this screen.
ITKs slipping who they've seen,

Good BUYS Mr Hughes,
not just anyone.
They've got to want to do it home and away!!

Oh Bluemoon uweeehuuuu ...I haven't got NO life,

But I'll be back again this time tomorrow...What a carry on
Carry on...because it really matters?




...I think I will just check the transfer page!!!!!!!!!!!!
Click to expand...

Haha that's brilliant mate.
 
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