The millions of football fans worldwide who believe that FIFA president Sepp Blatter is against modern technology could not be further from the truth. Though resisting the introduction of goal-line monitors that could have prevented the mistakes that cost England and Mexico so dearly on Sunday, the 74-year old has already shown that old dogs and new tricks are not always mutually exclusive.
The day before the World Cup began, Blatter announced that he was joining the world of twitter and would be regularly tweeting his views on the world game and updating his fans about his day-to-day business.
Nobody expected the man to be a Bridget Jones or even a 21st century Adrian Mole but his tweets so far have been entertaining enough. A man of the people, Blatter had made a lot of noise about how he alone had brought the World Cup to Africa and it was refreshing to read of the ordinary people he was encountering on a daily basis. Slovenia president Danilo Turk, Mayor of London Boris Johnson, New Zealand prime minister John Key and even retired former politician Bill Clinton have been lucky enough to meet the FIFA chief this month.
Sadly, it’s all gone a bit quiet on the Blatter front in the last 24 hours. On Sunday morning he tweeted: “Leaving for Bloemfontein for the next chapter in a match which has created World Cup history - 66, 70, 90 and 2010”. Since then, not a tweet has been heard.
The cynical will no doubt suggest that he has gone into hiding after an England goal was ruled out that afternoon and a clearly offside Argentina goal was allowed to stand against Mexico. STV Sport has a hunch about what might have gone wrong and thinks that such accusations are probably wide of the mark.
Like many who quickly embrace new technology, Blatter had forgotten to read up on the basics. Somewhere between leaving his hotel and arriving at the Germany v England game his phone ran out of battery, leaving him cut off from the Twitterverse. At the precise moment that Frank Lampard’s shot was bouncing two feet behind the German goal-line, the Swiss bureaucrat was wandering the corridors of the Free State stadium asking staff “if anyone has a charger for a Nokia N95?”
Sources have revealed that, although the problem was solved in time for the evening match, another hitch prevented Blatter from answering the thousands of questions being sent his way through social media. As Carlos Tevez nodded in Argentina’s opener from an offside position, Blatter, head in hands, was heard to mutter something about “having forgotten to top up his Pay As You Go” before leaving Switzerland.
The FIFA president, never short to court attention, was apparently beside himself with frustration at missing out on what was being said about him online. The watching world had seen the problems at the World Cup and were already rallying to offer him constructive advice.
“Global Foot 2Day” had kindly asked if Blatter was ok, tweeting: “ @seppblatter How's your day going buddy? Lots of people seem to be upset with you. You think you have any idea why? You are the new BP!!”
Schofe, unaware that Africa is only a different continent, sent the message: “Hello @seppblatter I'm going to shout because you are clearly on another planet... DO YOU SEE WHY THE TECHNOLOGY IS REQUIRED??!!!”
Jeroen 37 sensed that the man may have been under a little pressure and sent a wonderful message of support: “Thank you dear @SeppBlatter for not allowing technology, you were right there is no need for it. Why not add another 2 referees in 2014?”
Sadly other messages, which at one point were being tweeted at a rate of more than 1000 an hour, were largely negative.
When Blatter arrives home and sorts his phone out, he will undoubtedly take action. FIFA have already responded to complaints about the Adidas Jabulani ball or, as it is referred to in FIFA circles , “someone else’s mistake”.
“We are not deaf,” secretary general Jerome Valcke revealed. “Fifa is not unreceptive about what has been said about the ball.”
Not deaf, but for the time being strictly incommunicado, Blatter will no doubt set matters straight when he gets his faulty phone upgraded. Either that or he will ignore the calls for change and only tweet again to let us know he has granted Nelson Mandela an audience. We’ll have to wait and see but the curious can join the 38,000 currently following @seppblatter and tell the twit all about the power of technology.
