Has anyone seen him actually doing all those laps? Could it be, your honour, that he only did a few laps, one in the mid morning sun, one just after dinner and one as the sun was setting, put them on a tic-toc style loop video and fooled us all? Nobody thought to question it at the time because they were all too busy throwing money at the NHS to bail out the government and writing birthday cards, not for the Captain, but for the village hall near where he lives who now have more Hallmarks fare than they know what to do with.