10) Cristiano Ronaldo, Manchester United
Let's begin with a controversial entry...
Ronaldo has not been bad this season and even a Ronaldo half as good as he was last season is still one of the best players in the league. But, compared to last season, Ronaldo has been way short of half as good and anything but the best player in the league.
If there's a single reason why United are struggling to repeat their dominance of 2007/08, look no further than their Portuguese talisman's decline in form since returning from ankle surgery in September. At the close of January 2008, Ronaldo had scored 20 goals. This January, he has just nine to his name - mostly against modest opposition - and is scoreless in his last eight matches.
9) Matt Oakley, Leicester City
An unlikely selection perhaps but Oakley's descent has been steeper than most.
In fact, to let you in on a little secret before we reach the final eight in our hall of shame, Oakley is the only player on the list who is no longer plying his trade in the Premier League. The midfielder can now be found in the third tier of English football, which - even if some might say is the right arena for his talent - represents a mighty fall from grace for a player who began last season as the captain of a Premier League outfit and scored the first goal of the league season after just five minutes of Derby's reintroduction. Alas, it's been all downhill ever since 15.05pm, August 11, 2007.
8) Cesc Fabregas, Arsenal
The basis for Fabregas' entry is identical to Ronaldo's except that a) he wasn't quite as good as Ronaldo last season, b) he's been even worse than Ronaldo this season.
Injury might also be a factor in Fabregas' decline because the Spaniard was rushed back into club action without a proper rest after Euro 2008. But, even if he has a premature return as mitigation, the bottom line is that his performances have been dire ever since.
Now out of action until at least April, a longer-term threat to his future is the suspicion that he is only effective with a water-carrier providing for him (such as the much-missed Mathieu Flamini) and can be reduced to anonymity when left to fend for himself.
7) Sol Campbell, Portsmouth
Time is fast catching up with Sol. Which is the polite way of saying he is in reverse because he's so incredibly slow these days. Ocean liners with their anchor still set turn with greater speed than the Sol Campbell of 2008/09.
No wonder only the three promoted clubs and Blackburn have conceded more goals than Portsmouth so far this season.
6) Roque Santa Cruz, Blackburn Rovers
In bidding upwards of £15m for Santa Cruz, Manchester City are taking a leap of faith that the striker can recapture last season's form rather than continue in this season's dismal vein.
Having been the surprise individual success story of 2007/08, in which he netted 19 goals to finish as the fourth-highest scorer, Santa Cruz has been less than ordinary this term. A tally of three league goals says it all - and that City are taking an expensive gamble.
5) Robbie Keane, Liverpool
The tedious band of Liverpool supporters with handicapped shoulders who accept no comment on their club without embracing delusion will no doubt argue that Keane has been a glorious success since his £20.3m summer move to Anfield. For the rest of us, however, Keane has been dreadful and a wasteful shadow of last season's prolific forward, seemingly out of form and clueless as to what his role is at Liverpool.
It's not as a partner to Fernando Torres and, judging by his inactivity in two of Liverpool's last four league matches, is not the injured Spaniard's replacement either. After missing approximately six clear-cut opportunities at Preston on Saturday before being substituted for the soon-to-score Torres, the Irishman best be prepared for another lengthy spell on the bench.
4) David Bentley, Tottenham Hotspur
Tottenham should have been the making of Bentley. Instead, moving to the Lane has exposed his inadequacies and limitations.
Extremely effective because of his crossing ability in a Blackburn side that generally included two traditional centre-forwards, Bentley has failed - so far - to fit in to a Spurs side that tends to operate with just one out-and-out forward. The ability to cross doesn't count as much, therefore - which also explains why Aaron Lennon, arguably a worse crosser of a ball than any other first-choice winger in the league, has taken his place on the right.
All of which culminated this week in Harry Redknapp hauling him off at half-time against Burnley - "He was ill," declared Redknapp before a ghastly pause and the ultimate put-down: "Apparently" - and the Daily Mail dismissing him as 'the poor man's David Beckham'. And that's being kind. Even Tottenham fans are beginning to notice that Bentley is even slower than Beckham.
3) Anderson, Manchester United
What happened here? Nani at least has been honest with us from the start and has never for an instant looked capable of justifying his head-spinning £17m fee. But Anderson has been a tease. By outsmarting both Steven Gerrard and Cesc Fabregas in the space of a few weeks last December, the Brazilian gave us the wink and hinted he had the capacity to be one of the league's best. The glimpses shown were frightening in their potential.
Since then, however, nothing. All we've seen are a few pouts from the bench, a ridiculous haircut and an outing against Derby so pathetically lame that Sir Alex Ferguson should be considered a saint for leaving him on the pitch for 65 minutes. At least Nani's naffness was delivered by Ronseal.
2) Richard Dunne, Manchester City
Ouch. One of the best defenders in the league last season, the Irishman has been one of the worst ever since August. After being named Manchester City's player of the year for 2008 (and for two years before that), Dunne has been a liability ever since, making a ridiculous amount of goal-conceding gaffes and scoring two own goals to boot.
Mark Hughes has denied reports that he is contemplating sacking Dunne as City's captain because of his performances. But it's pretty damning when a manager has to make that sort of denial.
1) Micah Richards, Manchester City
Staying with damning denials, it's an insight into the extent of Micah Richards' decline that he has had to insist this month he isn't overweight and out of condition. Shouldn't he at least be alarmed that there are plenty of City supporters worried that is exactly what he has become? In any case, a bit of extra weight would at least give him an excuse for a string of horrendous performances in which his positional acumen would shame a decapitated chicken.
Whatever the actual reason, Richards has been nothing like the player of last season when he threatened to become a fixture in the England team. Now he is struggling to keep his place in a City side haunted by relegation, admits he should not be considered for selection as a centre-half and is ignored by an understandably-sceptical Fabio Capello. Has it already all gone wrong for the 20-year-old?
