Bereavement

A sad thread and condolences to the op. Made me think as my mum is 70 odd and not in good health and I have not spoken to her in 4 years. Maybe time to make amends even if I have never got her.

Scary to see my old man getting older. He said to me today if we do the domestic treble I can die happy! Never been a bigger blue than him. Time to think.
Get off your arse and do it. Not really bothered who's "fault" your issue with your mum is. You won't be able to make amends when she's no longer around.
 
Thanks, blues.


My mum gave me a momento with angels on it when I was suffering serious depression in 2016.

I think I will sob every time I see it from now on.
 
On Monday a very close friend told me his wife has cancer in the brain. She's had one op but they were told nobody has lived longer than ten years with her condition. She is in her 30's and they have 2 kids under 10yrs old.

Later that day my Ma told me her husband was having a 2nd op for bleed on the brain. He's 70 odd.

Then i went for a drink and a game of pool with another friend who told me the 'minor' op he was going in for today was actually for cancer of the bowel and liver.

Yesterday another mate buried his wife (53yrs) who he found stone cold dead in bed next to him one morning the week before.

My wife had a relapse last year and is slowly going down hill. Depression and suicidal thoughts are constant visitors to our house.

I bring all this up, not as a game of 'misery' top trumps, but as a reminder that our lives can change in a heart beat. The shit thing is that the older we get the more frequently shit like this occurs.

My Dad died a couple of years ago after a thankfully short illness. I was lucky enough to get a 'chat' with him just before, and the words he said have been a constant source of strength too me ever since. I hope PF finds the same solace in his Mothers.
 
Our own mortality is questioned when those close to us pass away sadly. As someone who has done it through a mixture of stubbornness and self pride make peace with those close to you as it will haunt you for years if you don't.
 
Lost my Mum in August. She was the one constant support in my life, my best friend, my rock...I can't even.

With no parents or grandparents left there's a massive void that I'm really struggling with. I've never felt so exposed and lost before. Its not a good feeling.

I'm back in England tomorrow as we've sold the house, family home since '76 and I need to collect anything personal I want.
 
On Monday a very close friend told me his wife has cancer in the brain. She's had one op but they were told nobody has lived longer than ten years with her condition. She is in her 30's and they have 2 kids under 10yrs old.

Later that day my Ma told me her husband was having a 2nd op for bleed on the brain. He's 70 odd.

Then i went for a drink and a game of pool with another friend who told me the 'minor' op he was going in for today was actually for cancer of the bowel and liver.

Yesterday another mate buried his wife (53yrs) who he found stone cold dead in bed next to him one morning the week before.

My wife had a relapse last year and is slowly going down hill. Depression and suicidal thoughts are constant visitors to our house.

I bring all this up, not as a game of 'misery' top trumps, but as a reminder that our lives can change in a heart beat. The shit thing is that the older we get the more frequently shit like this occurs.

My Dad died a couple of years ago after a thankfully short illness. I was lucky enough to get a 'chat' with him just before, and the words he said have been a constant source of strength too me ever since. I hope PF finds the same solace in his Mothers.

blimey, you should change your username to "Grim Reaper".
 
On Monday a very close friend told me his wife has cancer in the brain. She's had one op but they were told nobody has lived longer than ten years with her condition. She is in her 30's and they have 2 kids under 10yrs old.

Later that day my Ma told me her husband was having a 2nd op for bleed on the brain. He's 70 odd.

Then i went for a drink and a game of pool with another friend who told me the 'minor' op he was going in for today was actually for cancer of the bowel and liver.

Yesterday another mate buried his wife (53yrs) who he found stone cold dead in bed next to him one morning the week before.

My wife had a relapse last year and is slowly going down hill. Depression and suicidal thoughts are constant visitors to our house.

I bring all this up, not as a game of 'misery' top trumps, but as a reminder that our lives can change in a heart beat. The shit thing is that the older we get the more frequently shit like this occurs.

My Dad died a couple of years ago after a thankfully short illness. I was lucky enough to get a 'chat' with him just before, and the words he said have been a constant source of strength too me ever since. I hope PF finds the same solace in his Mothers.

That's a pretty tough week mate. Hope your Mrs gets sorted with whatever help is needed.
 
Sorry to hear about your mum mate, I lost my dad 2 years ago this April in circumstances, his health wasn't great but his death was sudden and unexpected.
I cried at the funeral and my anxiety and depression hit an all time low when I looked back at the times where I wasn't the best/easiest son to him, and I hated myself for believing that he'd make it out of hospital, missing the opportunity to say goodbye. Things played on my mind so bad that it got to the point where I had a seizure at home... I started taking antidepressants back in October and have felt so much better since....
I still have dreams where my dad is still alive and waking up to the realisation that he's gone still makes me sad, but I have come to terms with it.

It gets better as long as you are getting the support and help you need, just ignore putting on a front with people like I did. You won't ever get over the death of a parent, but bit by bit you start to cope.
 
On Monday a very close friend told me his wife has cancer in the brain. She's had one op but they were told nobody has lived longer than ten years with her condition. She is in her 30's and they have 2 kids under 10yrs old.

Later that day my Ma told me her husband was having a 2nd op for bleed on the brain. He's 70 odd.

Then i went for a drink and a game of pool with another friend who told me the 'minor' op he was going in for today was actually for cancer of the bowel and liver.

Yesterday another mate buried his wife (53yrs) who he found stone cold dead in bed next to him one morning the week before.

My wife had a relapse last year and is slowly going down hill. Depression and suicidal thoughts are constant visitors to our house.

I bring all this up, not as a game of 'misery' top trumps, but as a reminder that our lives can change in a heart beat. The shit thing is that the older we get the more frequently shit like this occurs.

My Dad died a couple of years ago after a thankfully short illness. I was lucky enough to get a 'chat' with him just before, and the words he said have been a constant source of strength too me ever since. I hope PF finds the same solace in his Mothers.

You are not kidding about the older we get the more frequent this shit occurs. I found life relatively easy before the age of 40. 40-50 has been a fucking nightmare from a health and family health perspective.

Sorry to hear about your wife. Mental illness is tough.

My dad died suddenly 10 years ago. He didn’t want to see any of us for 6 weeks or so prior to his death as he struggled mentally and with other crap. We went to city together for 32 years. I went to the City game a few days after out of a sense of duty and respect. He had only managed one game that season (Michael Johnson’s 1-0 Derby County game) the game after his death was won in the 92nd min with an Ireland goal against Reading. I was numb. He died a year before the takeover aged 61. Think it has shaped my feelings/life ever since.
 
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