cracking short stories...

Longsight, it was from the site "punternet" and the reviewer was called "manmeat".

I sent a loads of excerpts to some mates of mine so have a load of it readily at hand :

It was Friday - my wallet was full and so was my sac!

This had been a good work out for the two of us – I was sweating like a commuter on a bus full of muslim backpackers.

I mentioned that I’d like to try a BBBJ and Reverse Oral: these are two things I don’t usually try – not since the incident in Nottingham in 1999 involving the buck-toothed girl with the rancid fanny.

She reached back and fingered herself inches from my face – what a delightful sight: better than anything you’ll see in the Tate Modern.

She sucked my plums for a little while, then wrapped her lips around my manhood and sucked like a starving Ethiopian in need of protein.

WHOOOSH! A Tijuana Tremor tightened in my scrotum and my Molotov Cocktail erupted like a Sodapop Fountain spraying a high velocity burst of vibrant green and purple brocades into the room accompanied by the cackling of Golden Bees with a finale of Red Palm floral blooms. As the aerial spectacular subsided, thousands of translucent White Pearls splattered across her pert young breasts. What a display!
P.S. Sorry, I got a bit carried away at the end there. Forgive me, it’s a topical FR.

I would like to take this opportunity to say a special thanks to Jesus who, 2000 years ago, died that our sins may be forgiven. I committed 20 sins in 2005 and I hope to repeat it in 2006. Happy New Year
Click to expand...

I'll post some more later.
 
So less than a week since my last conquest off Plenty I find myself typing with a satisfied empty feeling in my ball bag. Thursdays are days off for me, no Wives, kids or customers about. Just me with the company of my filthy and often depraved thoughts. Having done the schoolrun I return home, get out my secret woman phone and see who wants to play. The cock is already washed and primed for battle. There were a couple of Mum's in the playground I'd eyed up, nothing exciting, most of the bush pigs round here have saggy tits and bad skin

Unfortunately the candidates I'd most hoped for were either working or feeding back lame excuses, but I do receive an unexpected text from Naomi, 30, from Pudsey. I'd chatted to Naomi last Sunday night and thrashed one out as she sent a series of filthy picture messages. Full gash shots the lot. Not the shy type is Naomi. She explained that she'd taken unplanned leave and would I like to go round and "Fuck her **** hard ?" Her words, not mine, I'm not a vulgar man.

2wns010.jpg


Here she is the little Princess. Unfortunately the XXX pics she sent me over the weekend were deleted. I really couldn't carry the risk of Mrs Dog discovering snaps of another bird's gash now could I ? Shame really....

So an entirely different vibe about today. The shananigans were already set in stone. There was no chase, no shamoozing, no ifs buts or doubts. Naomi had COMMANDED me to go over there for 1.30pm sharp. She wanted cock and wasn't afraid to express that. Ok madam, that shouldn't be a problem, give your clout a clean and I'll come over and bash it....

A small part of me couldn't be arsed today. Got a lot on, errands to run, shit to do, but I knew if I passed up the chance of the guaranteed poke today I'd have been shaking my head in frustration tonight. I would keep my appointment with Pip 38, if only to amuse the good folk off AWOL. A little after 1pm I hop in the car, tap in her post code and with a cheeky smile set off in the direction of Pudsey. Naomi had already informed me that she would be wearing no underwear, fishnets, high heels and a very short dress. Her texts were so full on it even crossed my mind one of the lads was playing a prank....but on I drove

I'm here. I see her childlike face pop out of the window. Not an ugly bird, but certainly no looker. Made a change seeing her mush to be honest, most pics had involved close-ups of her hungry snatch. House looks a little shabby and unkept, but I approach the door and before I can knock she's letting me in and stood before me in frankly FUCK ALL. Fake tan has gone a little haywire. **** looks like she's had a fight with a can of creosote. She gives me a brief and coy "Hello" then I'm pulled into the house, I've my back against the wall and she's grinding her growler into me whilst sucking my face off. Let me take me coat off love, what's on TV ??

Far from stopping there she drops to her knees. Seriously and with no hint of exaggeration, this is around 30 seconds in, she's yanking my zip and jeans down and then slurping deep throat on my cock with all the finesse of a fat kid chomping a Mars Bar. Holy fuck, slow down you ****, she's writhing around like a fucking epiplectic

Truely met my match here, "Naomi, stop, let's sit down...." I shout as I try to pull her up from the floor. With no acknowledgement she awkwardly rises from the floor then I'm dragged by the arm into the lounge. "I've been dying to see you, just fuck me now....." Seems tea and biscuits aren't the order of the day....

I'm now pinned against the sofa, her dress has ridden up revealing a clean shaven snatch. Hello my pretty, come to play ?!

I delve a few fingers in and it's dripping like a leaking tap. Hope there your fluids love and not the Postman's who's left 10 minutes prior ??

It's back on it's knees again. I've still only said hello and she's noshing my cock so hard I'm fearful it's gunna break off in her mouth. Right that's it. My turn to beast you. You wanna play rough you $2 whore, let's rumble....In a sweeping motion I disengage my lad from her hungry mouth, flip her onto the sofa on her back, fling her legs over my shoulders and bang my pipe straight in right up to the balls. In a frenzy I fuck it hard and without mercy whilst shouting in her face and throttling her. She squeals in delight, her eyes roll back like some cock obsessed zombie. The point of no return is near and in quick motion I slide out, straddle her face and fire my Love Ketchup down her throat. Take that you ****

She lays motionless for a bit. I prod it to make sure it's alive. It smiles back at me, an unnerving, hungry smile....

We do finally get to have a chat. Amazingly she adopts an altogether new and shy persona. She's clearly embarrassed at what has just taken place and blushed at every word I have to say. With the return schoolrun pending my time is limited. She's aware of this and anxious for a re-run before I fuck off. So 10 minutes later she's straddling me and riding my sword like Sea Biscuit. At one point the **** actually has hold of my ears, what the fuck is going on here ????

I doubt very much I'll visit this one again. I do enjoy a willing participant, but I'm also in favour of keeping my body parts attached to my person. I've just fucked a gorilla on cocaine....
 
Well how long has this been ? Not since last September did the Love Dog beast a new Pip. The fat bird on the counter at work. Since then things were rekindled with Mrs Dog and therefore affairs of the flange were put to one side. I'd hung up my sausage if you please.....

However, things have been shit of late. The relationship at home with Mrs Dog has badly deteriorated. Only one thing for it wasnt there ? Correct, a new secret profile on Plenty of Fish. The stomping ground for hungry beaver. A week in and I've collected about 8 new numbers and last night opened up a new campaign in the shape of Hannah, 31, from New Farnley, Leeds.....



Lovely girl. Not my usual bush pig. Quiet, thoughtful, delecate, upon first meeting her the chances of a poke appeared remote, but the Love Dog has powers of persuasion.

So under the pretence of going to the Leeds match I head down to meet Hannah who's a mere 2 miles away from where I live. A quiet, leafy suburb of Leeds. There she is outside the Co-op as we arranged. You'll do nicely love, your not going to break the suspension on my car, get in you ****

We head up to a local boozer, find a quiet corner and begin our courtship. Very timid is our Hannah, but she only orders half a lager so she's a cheap date Don't you hate it when they want a large glass of Pinot, £5 a chuck. I'm the typical tight Yorkshire **** So she sips her Fosters like a little mouse and we talk about work, holidays, family blah blah blah.....She's from Sheffield originally, only just moved to the sunny climes of Leeds, but I have warmed to that peculiar accent they have.

About 3 rounds in and Hannah is warming up a little I sense. Hello, what is this, she moves in a little closer, holds my hand and says, "I'm really glad I met up with you today...." Well me too Hannah, especially if I get to tickle your little box later

We await the football scores to roll through on the screens dotted around the boozer. She's suddenly developed a yearning for Leeds to get a result today to put a smile on my face even though she knows fuck all about football...."What league are you in now ???" Shut up now or I'll bum you over the table in front of all these people....And when Leeds pop in a winner on 98 mins or whatever the fuck it was the **** leapt off the seat. Embarrassment ensues....

So we head back to hers. I was a little surprised by her invitation. I thought this afternoon may simply be a little groundwork for better things to come. But she's become increasingly attentive, her cheeky fingers have been stroking the back of my neck and the slow lingering kiss we'd shared just before we left the pub suggested a little hanky panky may be on the cards.

Settling down to a bottle of red (fine choice Sheffield Bird) we talk a little more and I'm beginning to really enjoy her company. The house is immaculate unlike some of the rat pits I've previously encountered. I remember one bird's flat in the centre of Leeds that looked like it had played host to a rugby match. Festering boxes of take-away food strewn across the floor. I should have chucked that **** out of the high rise window.... Still fucked it like.

Now the red wine has completely stripped away Hannah's earlier apprehension. In fact I can't shut the **** up now I shuffle over to her and kissing slowly cup one of her tits. Not a lot to grab hold of here, seen more tit on a fish as my old Granny used to say. I move further down for a stroke of the pie through her tight leggings. Zero resistance and that spine tingling moan in my ear. Gentleman, fire your engines, we are moving in.....

Slipping my fingers into in her pants she gasps as I stroke her damp clam. She wrestles with my belt and zip and expertly pulls out my chap. Her dainty fingers look good around the old sword. Here we go Hannah, I'm now going to introduce you to my secret weapon. Yes here it is, the Turbo Tongue. I whip her leggings off, carry her onto the carpet and go downstairs for a taste of the burger. Lovely it is too, I've waited 5 months for this, Hubba Hubba, the pipe is dripping....

She's now urging me to slide in the chap and who am I to refuse a delectable lady such as Hannah. She gets her wish and I strobe it hard as her legs bounce unceremoniously across my back. 5 months of anticipation empties into her love purse. I'm done

We spend a further couple of hours nattering, kissing, watching shit TV and just before I leave we have another frantic poke as I bend her over the sofa and take her full tilt from behind. This time she climaxes noisily and shouts obscenities at me. Always the quiet ones aint it. A thoroughly enjoyable evening has been had by all
 
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