Embarrassing drunken experiences

talkativesprout said:
After a crisis of confidence took a young lady home for the first time after splitting up with a girlfriend of 11 yrs. My wankered repartee must have been top notch as we dispensed with the formalities and were molesting each other before I got the keys in my new bachelor pad. Straight to the bedroom and away we went.
I awoke the next morning with a feeling i hadn't felt since i was 10 yrs old, the unmistakable wet sheet underneath.

I lay there thinking i am seriously going to die of embarrassment when this girl wakes up. So I lay there head hurting mind racing pretending to be asleep. She finally stired, got dressed woke then me up from my fake sleep and said she had to go, thanks for a good night and she had left her phone number on the fire and i should call her if I wished too.
This was not what i had expected...This was loosing quid and finding a tenner elation, In an instant my befuddled mind went through wtf was going on?...had I been mistaken, had i been facing away from her and only soiled my side? i heard the latch click into place on the front door and was out of bed like a greyhound in trap one, whipped back the quilt to reveal the wet patch was all on her side the dirty woman had pissed my bed.
Click to expand...
Did you ring her for round 2?????!.........
 
Passed out drunk on a stag weekend in Magaluf. Woke up in a different room in another part of the hotel.
Turned out to be the only gay lad in the groups bed. He wasn't there, but the real worrying thing was i had an extra £300 in my back pocket when i only took out €60...

(later learned that i took the gay lad's money for safe keeping when he smashed his face against a stair rail and was knocked out. Some lads took him to get treatment. I then got pissed and couldn't find the hotel or even what room number i was. Bumped into the gay lad very late on whilst circling the bars. He directed me to his room , then he went out on the piss. Well i least hope that is what happened!!!)
 
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