Husband walked in yesterday with a City doormat as a "birthday gift" He pretends to be blue but he's a filthy RAG. Should I smother him with it?

[manimanc]

Get him pissed and shave one of his eyebrows off.

Or get him pissed and beat fuck out of him.

Your call.

 

[MadchesterCity]

suffocate him in his sleep?

 

[MikeF]

He sounds very childish. Get him a United emblazoned potty.

 

[GaudinoMotors]

Is that Mrs Ratcliffe?

 

[Sky Blue]

Do a Lorena Bobbit on him.

 

[Dave Ewing's Back 'eader]

And btw, it literally is a doormat. Way too small and flimsy for anyone to pretend it's a rug, least of all that closet Rag husband of mine. Gaslighting twat. He was laughing as he handed it over. I am open to suggestions about what's to be done about all this. Or is being a Rag with useless pub team players punishment enough for the lying clack-wanker.

Yer can have toilet rolls printed. I think I saw one some time back with the GPC's face on each sheet.

 

[Dave Ewing's Back 'eader]

Is that Mrs Ratcliffe?

If it is her husband is one scruffy ****!

 

[Eccles Blue]

Tie him to a chair in front of the TV, prop his eyelids open and make him watch last years FA Cup final on a loop for 3 days.

Plus a re-run of the sick swan at their hell hole.


In fact any of our matches against them in the past few years....not that they could be called 'matches' they don't match us in any shape or form. More their lost battles I'd say. :-)

 

[mancboy]

 

[Blue Mist]

Pam, Pamela, what can I say that your mother didn't?
If you were daft enough to marry one don't come moaning to me about the stupid useless sod. I told you to marry that nice boy, what was his name, Derek? He's at the Council now, a proper job that is. He wouldn't be so thoughtless, but did you listen ? Oh no my girl, you had to spite your mother didn't you. Its your own fault serves you right.