Limericks about Footballers

[SkyBlueTX]

There once was a striker named Wayne,
Who must have used loads of Rogaine.
But it must not have took
Else he hated the look
Since he glued wads of pubes to his crain.

 

[ONTHERUNWITHTHAKSIN]

Their is a player called Martin
His money he his always parting
He was forever betting
But he just kept forgetting
That the FA would be fucking smarting

 

[Mad Eyed Screamer]

There was a manager called Bond
And signing his son he was fond
So he displaced Nicky Reid
doing an unpleasant deed
shipping him to America and beyond!

 

[maccieblue]

There once was a big ponce called Beckham
Who came from the borough of Peckham
So he supported United of course
Then he married a horse
God I wish someone would deck 'em

 

[mosssideblue]

Rooney is a fat ****
He likes to eat a leathery fanny
Piss taking pube head scouse

Just needs a little polishing to make it perfect :)

 

[Paladin]

Our seventies player Mike Channon
Could throw-in as fast as a cannon
One miscalculation
The ball left the nation
And fell in a suburb of Shannon

 

[Mad Eyed Screamer]

There once was a big ponce called Beckham
Who came from the borough of Peckham
So he supported United of course
Then he married a horse
God I wish someone would deck 'em

PMSL

 

[Mad Eyed Screamer]

There once was one a rat boy from Bury
To Spain he travelled on a ferry
Got off in Valencia
His team caught dementia
And the fans are now happy and merry

 

[Paladin]

The gambling man DeMichelis
Is facing a spell in the jail if
His visits to Coral
Are deemed as immoral
By the FA, the judge and their bailiff

 

[dronefromsector7G]

Our dear old Nic Otamendi
Shaved his head in a way he thought trendy
Added to his latest tatt
It made him look a twat
And the way he tackles is all bendy