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From the El Confidencial report the only thing I see as most likely to be true is that Madrid and Malaga have agreed a fee. All this means is that Isco actually has a choice between us and Madrid, as opposed to the usual media hysteria creating the idea of a choice. Of course, it would be quite...

Oldham V Chelsea. Old 2nd Division. 1977 "Number 1 fer Chelsea - Bunnetti" "Number 2, Arris" Stood with the Chelsea loons on a crumbling open terrace - a lot of which ended up on the pitch. Most popular shout from the "Chaddy" end - "SHOOT". No-one did. I don't remember any goals.

Look, for next season we can fully get behind the Spaniards, Argentines, Bosnians, Montenegrans, Serbs and Ivorians. But for f**k sake make sure there's no bloody Irish.

At what age will young players start at the academy? It seems to me that due to the FA and the appalling state of English coaching, English players will already have been through the moronic 'big and fast' filter long before they get old enough for the academy.

Of course he isn't total shit. He's no Ricky Lambert though.

Everyone expects opposing forwards to have a difficult time against Spain. I was looking for Cavani to produce just 1 or 2 moments in the entire game that might indicate he has something special to offer. Even if that was just managing to make a defender do something hurried. There was nothing...

But I don't need any of this to lift every last bit of data stored in your network. It wouldn't be easy but if the above is your defence you're sitting in the wrong trench.

Wrong again. I'm only interested in the football aspect. I see football purely as entertainment. From that perspective, Mario was a genius and Edin is a big lump. However, I can see that if you saw something in football that represented an extension of yourself and therefore that the result or...

Nah. He'd still be a big lump of a footballer.

Higher Openshaw / Gorton I'm not ashamed - but I'm not proud either. It doesn't matter. When I was 5 I thought it was important I came from 'our street'. When people ask where I'm from - my answer is generally guided by what I think they are looking for. So, if someone from North Korea asks...

John Bond - never warmed to the bloke, but his transformation of Malcolm's misfits by a few astute bargain signings was a quite astonishing turnaround. Of the managers who had to make do with a playing staff of limited quality, I'd say McNeill showed himself to be a good manager. That's no...

Indeed. Must mean FFP rules deficit.

Indeed. In my handed-down 1940s/50s Subbuteo set ( cardboard players ) it is most certainly Table Soccer.

I wonder if Doris had a hard core of Anti-Fans who turned up at performances to shriek "you're a fraud". Following the ITK scene is a bit like being in Blazing Saddles. When your favourite ITK turns out to be wrong, if your reaction might be "You lied to Mongo. Mongo angry now", then it isn't...

Seem to remember the gun and very important silencer was black metal. More than enough to get you shot in the head if you waved it about in the street today.

I was pretty much agnostic until I met my new chums War, Famine and Pestilence. I don't normally share our conversations but in this case I'll make an exception and I can assure you that Graham is toast.

Well, I guess that makes me Miss Piggy then. I'm not convinced so that would make me a doubter. I've seen enough evidence to say he's worth persevering with. And if he does turn it around, I doubt there'd be a more popular player at the club. Perhaps I'm wording it wrong. I can see the...

Why thank you. I've been called worse by people who know me, so result!!

Err - I don't think agreeing or disagreeing with Dismal is the point. 39 pages so far.

I always feel Kiddo might just be the most patronised person in Manchester football. Perhaps that's what happens to nice blokes. "Everyone in the room hold up your European Cup Winners' medal. Err - right. Just Brian , then."