On April 30, the world will end as we know it.
The skies will fall and the mountains will crumble to the sea.
Either that, or Manchester United will win.
There was a sickening feeling of inevitability watching Everton claw themselves back from the abyss last weekend, a confirmation of our worst fears—that the outcome of Monday's Manchester derby will most likely confirm the destination of the Premier League trophy.
But then, United have always done things the hard way.
Maybe that's why we love them?
Nevertheless, the majority of United fans will probably watch Monday's game through their fingers, too terrified of the potential ramifications should we lose, to be able to enjoy the mother of all title showdowns.
So much will rest on the shoulders of Rio Ferdinand and Jonny Evans, who will need to do what they were unable to do in October—keep a lid on a potent City front-line.
Scholes and Carrick will need to control the midfield, with Nani and Valencia threatening from wide positions.
And Wayne Rooney and young Danny Welbeck will need to justify the hype—that they are the new dominant attacking partnership to lead us into the future.
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There has been another feeling of sickening inevitability in witnessing Carlos Tevez's return to form over the past few weeks; a player who is sure to play a meaningful part on Monday.
His presence is an added storyline to a season that has already been jam-packed with enough material to fill part two of Sir Alex's autobiography.
There is the fear that Mr. "Why Always Me?" Balotelli will score the winner and pull up his shirt to reveal another hilarious quote that will undo all of his past stupidity and cement his legendary status in the blue half of Manchester.
There is the fear that Roberto Mancini's horrible attempts at mind games will be proved genius should City win—that his look of "I told you so" in the post-match interview will be too hard to bear.
Life would not be worth living.
Perhaps it would be best then, if this were to be the outcome, if the world were to end Monday at 10 p.m.
There is another possibility though, a possibility that not a single pundit, journalist or fan has seemed to consider in the buildup.
That Monday's match might end up a draw.
We'll take that, thank you.
And you can hold off on the Apocalypse too whilst you're at it.
(At least until next weekend.)
