Feed-The-Goat
Well-Known Member
Scottyboi said:
i lol'd
**** lol.
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cracking short stories...
- Thread starter mrcunny
- Start date
i lol'd
**** lol.
stevethecab
Well-Known Member
- Joined
- 28 Jun 2009
- Messages
- 497
i got tears streaming down my cheeks reading thisScottyboi said:Best thread on here even if its fake its still class, been reading them my girlfriend haha.
Well how long has this been ? Not since last September did the Love Dog beast a new Pip. The fat bird on the counter at work. Since then things were rekindled with Mrs Dog and therefore affairs of the flange were put to one side. I'd hung up my sausage if you please.....
However, things have been shit of late. The relationship at home with Mrs Dog has badly deteriorated. Only one thing for it wasnt there ? Correct, a new secret profile on Plenty of Fish. The stomping ground for hungry beaver. A week in and I've collected about 8 new numbers and last night opened up a new campaign in the shape of Hannah, 31, from New Farnley, Leeds.....
Lovely girl. Not my usual bush pig. Quiet, thoughtful, delecate, upon first meeting her the chances of a poke appeared remote, but the Love Dog has powers of persuasion.
So under the pretence of going to the Leeds match I head down to meet Hannah who's a mere 2 miles away from where I live. A quiet, leafy suburb of Leeds. There she is outside the Co-op as we arranged. You'll do nicely love, your not going to break the suspension on my car, get in you ****
We head up to a local boozer, find a quiet corner and begin our courtship. Very timid is our Hannah, but she only orders half a lager so she's a cheap date Don't you hate it when they want a large glass of Pinot, £5 a chuck. I'm the typical tight Yorkshire **** So she sips her Fosters like a little mouse and we talk about work, holidays, family blah blah blah.....She's from Sheffield originally, only just moved to the sunny climes of Leeds, but I have warmed to that peculiar accent they have.
About 3 rounds in and Hannah is warming up a little I sense. Hello, what is this, she moves in a little closer, holds my hand and says, "I'm really glad I met up with you today...." Well me too Hannah, especially if I get to tickle your little box later
We await the football scores to roll through on the screens dotted around the boozer. She's suddenly developed a yearning for Leeds to get a result today to put a smile on my face even though she knows fuck all about football...."What league are you in now ???" Shut up now or I'll bum you over the table in front of all these people....And when Leeds pop in a winner on 98 mins or whatever the fuck it was the **** leapt off the seat. Embarrassment ensues....
So we head back to hers. I was a little surprised by her invitation. I thought this afternoon may simply be a little groundwork for better things to come. But she's become increasingly attentive, her cheeky fingers have been stroking the back of my neck and the slow lingering kiss we'd shared just before we left the pub suggested a little hanky panky may be on the cards.
Settling down to a bottle of red (fine choice Sheffield Bird) we talk a little more and I'm beginning to really enjoy her company. The house is immaculate unlike some of the rat pits I've previously encountered. I remember one bird's flat in the centre of Leeds that looked like it had played host to a rugby match. Festering boxes of take-away food strewn across the floor. I should have chucked that **** out of the high rise window.... Still fucked it like.
Now the red wine has completely stripped away Hannah's earlier apprehension. In fact I can't shut the **** up now I shuffle over to her and kissing slowly cup one of her tits. Not a lot to grab hold of here, seen more tit on a fish as my old Granny used to say. I move further down for a stroke of the pie through her tight leggings. Zero resistance and that spine tingling moan in my ear. Gentleman, fire your engines, we are moving in.....
Slipping my fingers into in her pants she gasps as I stroke her damp clam. She wrestles with my belt and zip and expertly pulls out my chap. Her dainty fingers look good around the old sword. Here we go Hannah, I'm now going to introduce you to my secret weapon. Yes here it is, the Turbo Tongue. I whip her leggings off, carry her onto the carpet and go downstairs for a taste of the burger. Lovely it is too, I've waited 5 months for this, Hubba Hubba, the pipe is dripping....
She's now urging me to slide in the chap and who am I to refuse a delectable lady such as Hannah. She gets her wish and I strobe it hard as her legs bounce unceremoniously across my back. 5 months of anticipation empties into her love purse. I'm done
We spend a further couple of hours nattering, kissing, watching shit TV and just before I leave we have another frantic poke as I bend her over the sofa and take her full tilt from behind. This time she climaxes noisily and shouts obscenities at me. Always the quiet ones aint it. A thoroughly enjoyable evening has been had by all<br /><br />-- Mon Jan 14, 2013 10:40 pm --<br /><br />So less than a week since my last conquest off Plenty I find myself typing with a satisfied empty feeling in my ball bag. Thursdays are days off for me, no Wives, kids or customers about. Just me with the company of my filthy and often depraved thoughts. Having done the schoolrun I return home, get out my secret woman phone and see who wants to play. The cock is already washed and primed for battle. There were a couple of Mum's in the playground I'd eyed up, nothing exciting, most of the bush pigs round here have saggy tits and bad skin
Unfortunately the candidates I'd most hoped for were either working or feeding back lame excuses, but I do receive an unexpected text from Naomi, 30, from Pudsey. I'd chatted to Naomi last Sunday night and thrashed one out as she sent a series of filthy picture messages. Full gash shots the lot. Not the shy type is Naomi. She explained that she'd taken unplanned leave and would I like to go round and "Fuck her **** hard ?" Her words, not mine, I'm not a vulgar man.
Here she is the little Princess. Unfortunately the XXX pics she sent me over the weekend were deleted. I really couldn't carry the risk of Mrs Dog discovering snaps of another bird's gash now could I ? Shame really....
So an entirely different vibe about today. The shananigans were already set in stone. There was no chase, no shamoozing, no ifs buts or doubts. Naomi had COMMANDED me to go over there for 1.30pm sharp. She wanted cock and wasn't afraid to express that. Ok madam, that shouldn't be a problem, give your clout a clean and I'll come over and bash it....
A small part of me couldn't be arsed today. Got a lot on, errands to run, shit to do, but I knew if I passed up the chance of the guaranteed poke today I'd have been shaking my head in frustration tonight. I would keep my appointment with Pip 38, if only to amuse the good folk off AWOL. A little after 1pm I hop in the car, tap in her post code and with a cheeky smile set off in the direction of Pudsey. Naomi had already informed me that she would be wearing no underwear, fishnets, high heels and a very short dress. Her texts were so full on it even crossed my mind one of the lads was playing a prank....but on I drove
I'm here. I see her childlike face pop out of the window. Not an ugly bird, but certainly no looker. Made a change seeing her mush to be honest, most pics had involved close-ups of her hungry snatch. House looks a little shabby and unkept, but I approach the door and before I can knock she's letting me in and stood before me in frankly FUCK ALL. Fake tan has gone a little haywire. **** looks like she's had a fight with a can of creosote. She gives me a brief and coy "Hello" then I'm pulled into the house, I've my back against the wall and she's grinding her growler into me whilst sucking my face off. Let me take me coat off love, what's on TV ??
Far from stopping there she drops to her knees. Seriously and with no hint of exaggeration, this is around 30 seconds in, she's yanking my zip and jeans down and then slurping deep throat on my cock with all the finesse of a fat kid chomping a Mars Bar. Holy fuck, slow down you ****, she's writhing around like a fucking epiplectic
Truely met my match here, "Naomi, stop, let's sit down...." I shout as I try to pull her up from the floor. With no acknowledgement she awkwardly rises from the floor then I'm dragged by the arm into the lounge. "I've been dying to see you, just fuck me now....." Seems tea and biscuits aren't the order of the day....
I'm now pinned against the sofa, her dress has ridden up revealing a clean shaven snatch. Hello my pretty, come to play ?!
I delve a few fingers in and it's dripping like a leaking tap. Hope there your fluids love and not the Postman's who's left 10 minutes prior ??
It's back on it's knees again. I've still only said hello and she's noshing my cock so hard I'm fearful it's gunna break off in her mouth. Right that's it. My turn to beast you. You wanna play rough you $2 whore, let's rumble....In a sweeping motion I disengage my lad from her hungry mouth, flip her onto the sofa on her back, fling her legs over my shoulders and bang my pipe straight in right up to the balls. In a frenzy I fuck it hard and without mercy whilst shouting in her face and throttling her. She squeals in delight, her eyes roll back like some cock obsessed zombie. The point of no return is near and in quick motion I slide out, straddle her face and fire my Love Ketchup down her throat. Take that you ****
She lays motionless for a bit. I prod it to make sure it's alive. It smiles back at me, an unnerving, hungry smile....
We do finally get to have a chat. Amazingly she adopts an altogether new and shy persona. She's clearly embarrassed at what has just taken place and blushed at every word I have to say. With the return schoolrun pending my time is limited. She's aware of this and anxious for a re-run before I fuck off. So 10 minutes later she's straddling me and riding my sword like Sea Biscuit. At one point the **** actually has hold of my ears, what the fuck is going on here ????
I doubt very much I'll visit this one again. I do enjoy a willing participant, but I'm also in favour of keeping my body parts attached to my person. I've just fucked a gorilla on cocaine....
However, things have been shit of late. The relationship at home with Mrs Dog has badly deteriorated. Only one thing for it wasnt there ? Correct, a new secret profile on Plenty of Fish. The stomping ground for hungry beaver. A week in and I've collected about 8 new numbers and last night opened up a new campaign in the shape of Hannah, 31, from New Farnley, Leeds.....
Lovely girl. Not my usual bush pig. Quiet, thoughtful, delecate, upon first meeting her the chances of a poke appeared remote, but the Love Dog has powers of persuasion.
So under the pretence of going to the Leeds match I head down to meet Hannah who's a mere 2 miles away from where I live. A quiet, leafy suburb of Leeds. There she is outside the Co-op as we arranged. You'll do nicely love, your not going to break the suspension on my car, get in you ****
We head up to a local boozer, find a quiet corner and begin our courtship. Very timid is our Hannah, but she only orders half a lager so she's a cheap date Don't you hate it when they want a large glass of Pinot, £5 a chuck. I'm the typical tight Yorkshire **** So she sips her Fosters like a little mouse and we talk about work, holidays, family blah blah blah.....She's from Sheffield originally, only just moved to the sunny climes of Leeds, but I have warmed to that peculiar accent they have.
About 3 rounds in and Hannah is warming up a little I sense. Hello, what is this, she moves in a little closer, holds my hand and says, "I'm really glad I met up with you today...." Well me too Hannah, especially if I get to tickle your little box later
We await the football scores to roll through on the screens dotted around the boozer. She's suddenly developed a yearning for Leeds to get a result today to put a smile on my face even though she knows fuck all about football...."What league are you in now ???" Shut up now or I'll bum you over the table in front of all these people....And when Leeds pop in a winner on 98 mins or whatever the fuck it was the **** leapt off the seat. Embarrassment ensues....
So we head back to hers. I was a little surprised by her invitation. I thought this afternoon may simply be a little groundwork for better things to come. But she's become increasingly attentive, her cheeky fingers have been stroking the back of my neck and the slow lingering kiss we'd shared just before we left the pub suggested a little hanky panky may be on the cards.
Settling down to a bottle of red (fine choice Sheffield Bird) we talk a little more and I'm beginning to really enjoy her company. The house is immaculate unlike some of the rat pits I've previously encountered. I remember one bird's flat in the centre of Leeds that looked like it had played host to a rugby match. Festering boxes of take-away food strewn across the floor. I should have chucked that **** out of the high rise window.... Still fucked it like.
Now the red wine has completely stripped away Hannah's earlier apprehension. In fact I can't shut the **** up now I shuffle over to her and kissing slowly cup one of her tits. Not a lot to grab hold of here, seen more tit on a fish as my old Granny used to say. I move further down for a stroke of the pie through her tight leggings. Zero resistance and that spine tingling moan in my ear. Gentleman, fire your engines, we are moving in.....
Slipping my fingers into in her pants she gasps as I stroke her damp clam. She wrestles with my belt and zip and expertly pulls out my chap. Her dainty fingers look good around the old sword. Here we go Hannah, I'm now going to introduce you to my secret weapon. Yes here it is, the Turbo Tongue. I whip her leggings off, carry her onto the carpet and go downstairs for a taste of the burger. Lovely it is too, I've waited 5 months for this, Hubba Hubba, the pipe is dripping....
She's now urging me to slide in the chap and who am I to refuse a delectable lady such as Hannah. She gets her wish and I strobe it hard as her legs bounce unceremoniously across my back. 5 months of anticipation empties into her love purse. I'm done
We spend a further couple of hours nattering, kissing, watching shit TV and just before I leave we have another frantic poke as I bend her over the sofa and take her full tilt from behind. This time she climaxes noisily and shouts obscenities at me. Always the quiet ones aint it. A thoroughly enjoyable evening has been had by all<br /><br />-- Mon Jan 14, 2013 10:40 pm --<br /><br />So less than a week since my last conquest off Plenty I find myself typing with a satisfied empty feeling in my ball bag. Thursdays are days off for me, no Wives, kids or customers about. Just me with the company of my filthy and often depraved thoughts. Having done the schoolrun I return home, get out my secret woman phone and see who wants to play. The cock is already washed and primed for battle. There were a couple of Mum's in the playground I'd eyed up, nothing exciting, most of the bush pigs round here have saggy tits and bad skin
Unfortunately the candidates I'd most hoped for were either working or feeding back lame excuses, but I do receive an unexpected text from Naomi, 30, from Pudsey. I'd chatted to Naomi last Sunday night and thrashed one out as she sent a series of filthy picture messages. Full gash shots the lot. Not the shy type is Naomi. She explained that she'd taken unplanned leave and would I like to go round and "Fuck her **** hard ?" Her words, not mine, I'm not a vulgar man.
Here she is the little Princess. Unfortunately the XXX pics she sent me over the weekend were deleted. I really couldn't carry the risk of Mrs Dog discovering snaps of another bird's gash now could I ? Shame really....
So an entirely different vibe about today. The shananigans were already set in stone. There was no chase, no shamoozing, no ifs buts or doubts. Naomi had COMMANDED me to go over there for 1.30pm sharp. She wanted cock and wasn't afraid to express that. Ok madam, that shouldn't be a problem, give your clout a clean and I'll come over and bash it....
A small part of me couldn't be arsed today. Got a lot on, errands to run, shit to do, but I knew if I passed up the chance of the guaranteed poke today I'd have been shaking my head in frustration tonight. I would keep my appointment with Pip 38, if only to amuse the good folk off AWOL. A little after 1pm I hop in the car, tap in her post code and with a cheeky smile set off in the direction of Pudsey. Naomi had already informed me that she would be wearing no underwear, fishnets, high heels and a very short dress. Her texts were so full on it even crossed my mind one of the lads was playing a prank....but on I drove
I'm here. I see her childlike face pop out of the window. Not an ugly bird, but certainly no looker. Made a change seeing her mush to be honest, most pics had involved close-ups of her hungry snatch. House looks a little shabby and unkept, but I approach the door and before I can knock she's letting me in and stood before me in frankly FUCK ALL. Fake tan has gone a little haywire. **** looks like she's had a fight with a can of creosote. She gives me a brief and coy "Hello" then I'm pulled into the house, I've my back against the wall and she's grinding her growler into me whilst sucking my face off. Let me take me coat off love, what's on TV ??
Far from stopping there she drops to her knees. Seriously and with no hint of exaggeration, this is around 30 seconds in, she's yanking my zip and jeans down and then slurping deep throat on my cock with all the finesse of a fat kid chomping a Mars Bar. Holy fuck, slow down you ****, she's writhing around like a fucking epiplectic
Truely met my match here, "Naomi, stop, let's sit down...." I shout as I try to pull her up from the floor. With no acknowledgement she awkwardly rises from the floor then I'm dragged by the arm into the lounge. "I've been dying to see you, just fuck me now....." Seems tea and biscuits aren't the order of the day....
I'm now pinned against the sofa, her dress has ridden up revealing a clean shaven snatch. Hello my pretty, come to play ?!
I delve a few fingers in and it's dripping like a leaking tap. Hope there your fluids love and not the Postman's who's left 10 minutes prior ??
It's back on it's knees again. I've still only said hello and she's noshing my cock so hard I'm fearful it's gunna break off in her mouth. Right that's it. My turn to beast you. You wanna play rough you $2 whore, let's rumble....In a sweeping motion I disengage my lad from her hungry mouth, flip her onto the sofa on her back, fling her legs over my shoulders and bang my pipe straight in right up to the balls. In a frenzy I fuck it hard and without mercy whilst shouting in her face and throttling her. She squeals in delight, her eyes roll back like some cock obsessed zombie. The point of no return is near and in quick motion I slide out, straddle her face and fire my Love Ketchup down her throat. Take that you ****
She lays motionless for a bit. I prod it to make sure it's alive. It smiles back at me, an unnerving, hungry smile....
We do finally get to have a chat. Amazingly she adopts an altogether new and shy persona. She's clearly embarrassed at what has just taken place and blushed at every word I have to say. With the return schoolrun pending my time is limited. She's aware of this and anxious for a re-run before I fuck off. So 10 minutes later she's straddling me and riding my sword like Sea Biscuit. At one point the **** actually has hold of my ears, what the fuck is going on here ????
I doubt very much I'll visit this one again. I do enjoy a willing participant, but I'm also in favour of keeping my body parts attached to my person. I've just fucked a gorilla on cocaine....
Barcon
Well-Known Member
Nobody likes a talker.
Twas the night before Christmas
And all through the house
Not a creature was stirring
Because the fat slut had been ruined by the Love Dog
Ho, Ho, Ho my AWOL friends....and Flanders. Well I must say the Pip series was somewhat neglected this year. Was this because the Love Dog had finally hung up his cock in the garden shed ? Had he found true love with his new woman in Bradford following a protracted divorce with Mrs Dog number 2. Had he lost his handsome looks and irresistable charm ? Not on your fucking life chaps. The Dog has been sniffing around snatch all year with renewed vigour. Another 6 lucky lucky 'ladies' have been added to the Hall of Fame. A Summer Snatchathon if you please......
Where the fuck do I begin ?
Well in the earlier part of the year Mrs Dog No.2 finally pulled the plug on our 12 year relationship. Can't for the life of me think why ? Selfish **** Did the Dog lick his wounds in a corner and cry himself to sleep every night. No, he moved in with a new tidy bird in Bradford and licked her wound instead. Her axe wound. Lucky lady had just inherited Captain Turbo Tongue....A few others did too. And so it begins....
PIP 41 : BEAN POLE BECKY
As most of you know I work as a mortgage adviser for a well known bank. The job is rewarding, I get to change people's lives, bring their hopes and dreams to reality and occasionally gain access to their beavers. Open a new account and leave a deposit if you please. Yes I've had the fingers burnt on a couple of occasions and nearly lost my job as a consequence. But for a sex addict predator like the Love Dog that is a risk worth taking. A bit like FV. You know you could get banged up for it but you can't let go of the buzz. It has it's claws on your soul......and in my case my ball sack.
So then, Becky. Beautiful, bean pole Becky. 40 years of age, a long distance runner and part of some fucking weird local runners club. Met her in the bank to discuss a mortgage funnily enough and so began the onset of a cheeky affair. In fact all of my Pips this Summer are customers with the exception of one. A branch manager called Jo.....But more of that fat **** later.....
A mortgage interview can take anything from an hour to 2 hours. You get to know and learn a lot about your client and of course flirt like fuck if it's tidy. Becky and myself had this instant chemistry. She stared intently with a naughty twinkle in her eye throughout our meeting. It was obvious....Her gusset was damp. She longed for the filthy fingers of her mortgage adviser to glide through her pubic hair and into her hungry hole.
With business all wrapped up, a smile and a warm handshake, she was off. She had my business card of course with mobile number and I sat patiently awaiting the inevitable text. I only had to wait 20 minutes and it loosely said, "Thankyou ever so much for today. You were really helpful. Thanks for the coffee, maybe we can have a drink outside of work sometime ? :-)"
BACK OF THE NET !!
Seizing the moment drinkipoos were in fact arranged for that evening. At this time and prior to moving in with Bradford Bird the Dog was living with Mummy once more. Not cool at nearly 40, but free and necessary. No lady at home to answer to. Just wash the cock and out the door.....This was also prior to my drink drive ban as I disclosed to you all a couple of months ago, so off I set in the direction of New Farnley, a leafy suburb of Leeds.
A pleasant evening was had. Becky was wearing a pair of high heels she'd just bought and could barely walk in them. The perfect opportunity to be a gentleman and tightly hold her as we snaked around a few pretentious wanky bars around Leeds City Centre. Never one to enjoy splashing the cash on gash, the Dog was relieved that Becky didn't mind putting her hand in her pocket
Now being a distance runner and about as fat as my garden rake, Becky was soon rather pissed. I bungled it into my new "Mazda Midlife Crisis Sportscar" and off we set in the direction of home. She lives alone and her little boy was with his Dad. Invite me in you slag, my nuts are tingling ! And so she did....
Red wine was opened. In fact 3 bottles by the end of the evening. It would be irresponsible and dangerous to drive home she said.....Don't lie. You want your crevice filling !
"Bean Pole" lead me upstairs in her beautifully decorated house. The initially timid and shy Becky was now leading from the front and within 5 minutes we were naked in her bed with her noshing on my swollen pipe. HUBBA HUBBA....Take it you Ethiopian cock guzzler, The Love Dog's gunna fill ya with vitamins
Becky didn't come up for air as she took a full wad to the back of her throat. Had to push the **** off as I got that painful post ejaculation sensation coursing through my bellend. A few minutes recovery and I bent slinky over and in one motion stuck my chap into her dribbling ****. Felt every inch move in. Tidy burger love, now for a little more Love Ketchup....
So that was Pip 41 in a nutshell. Becky and I saw one another a few times after. She was Girlfriend material to be fair, but with too much going around around me, the moment was lost. Funnily enough I saw her once more a few days ago. That twinkle still remained in her eye. May strobe it again sometime soon
Over Christmas I'll edit and add to this thread. Got the bird floating about wondering what the fuck I'm typing on here. So 5 more tales to regale in their full filthy glory as and when I can, but for now.<br /><br />-- Mon Jan 14, 2013 10:47 pm --<br /><br />
or a stalker..
And all through the house
Not a creature was stirring
Because the fat slut had been ruined by the Love Dog
Ho, Ho, Ho my AWOL friends....and Flanders. Well I must say the Pip series was somewhat neglected this year. Was this because the Love Dog had finally hung up his cock in the garden shed ? Had he found true love with his new woman in Bradford following a protracted divorce with Mrs Dog number 2. Had he lost his handsome looks and irresistable charm ? Not on your fucking life chaps. The Dog has been sniffing around snatch all year with renewed vigour. Another 6 lucky lucky 'ladies' have been added to the Hall of Fame. A Summer Snatchathon if you please......
Where the fuck do I begin ?
Well in the earlier part of the year Mrs Dog No.2 finally pulled the plug on our 12 year relationship. Can't for the life of me think why ? Selfish **** Did the Dog lick his wounds in a corner and cry himself to sleep every night. No, he moved in with a new tidy bird in Bradford and licked her wound instead. Her axe wound. Lucky lady had just inherited Captain Turbo Tongue....A few others did too. And so it begins....
PIP 41 : BEAN POLE BECKY
As most of you know I work as a mortgage adviser for a well known bank. The job is rewarding, I get to change people's lives, bring their hopes and dreams to reality and occasionally gain access to their beavers. Open a new account and leave a deposit if you please. Yes I've had the fingers burnt on a couple of occasions and nearly lost my job as a consequence. But for a sex addict predator like the Love Dog that is a risk worth taking. A bit like FV. You know you could get banged up for it but you can't let go of the buzz. It has it's claws on your soul......and in my case my ball sack.
So then, Becky. Beautiful, bean pole Becky. 40 years of age, a long distance runner and part of some fucking weird local runners club. Met her in the bank to discuss a mortgage funnily enough and so began the onset of a cheeky affair. In fact all of my Pips this Summer are customers with the exception of one. A branch manager called Jo.....But more of that fat **** later.....
A mortgage interview can take anything from an hour to 2 hours. You get to know and learn a lot about your client and of course flirt like fuck if it's tidy. Becky and myself had this instant chemistry. She stared intently with a naughty twinkle in her eye throughout our meeting. It was obvious....Her gusset was damp. She longed for the filthy fingers of her mortgage adviser to glide through her pubic hair and into her hungry hole.
With business all wrapped up, a smile and a warm handshake, she was off. She had my business card of course with mobile number and I sat patiently awaiting the inevitable text. I only had to wait 20 minutes and it loosely said, "Thankyou ever so much for today. You were really helpful. Thanks for the coffee, maybe we can have a drink outside of work sometime ? :-)"
BACK OF THE NET !!
Seizing the moment drinkipoos were in fact arranged for that evening. At this time and prior to moving in with Bradford Bird the Dog was living with Mummy once more. Not cool at nearly 40, but free and necessary. No lady at home to answer to. Just wash the cock and out the door.....This was also prior to my drink drive ban as I disclosed to you all a couple of months ago, so off I set in the direction of New Farnley, a leafy suburb of Leeds.
A pleasant evening was had. Becky was wearing a pair of high heels she'd just bought and could barely walk in them. The perfect opportunity to be a gentleman and tightly hold her as we snaked around a few pretentious wanky bars around Leeds City Centre. Never one to enjoy splashing the cash on gash, the Dog was relieved that Becky didn't mind putting her hand in her pocket
Now being a distance runner and about as fat as my garden rake, Becky was soon rather pissed. I bungled it into my new "Mazda Midlife Crisis Sportscar" and off we set in the direction of home. She lives alone and her little boy was with his Dad. Invite me in you slag, my nuts are tingling ! And so she did....
Red wine was opened. In fact 3 bottles by the end of the evening. It would be irresponsible and dangerous to drive home she said.....Don't lie. You want your crevice filling !
"Bean Pole" lead me upstairs in her beautifully decorated house. The initially timid and shy Becky was now leading from the front and within 5 minutes we were naked in her bed with her noshing on my swollen pipe. HUBBA HUBBA....Take it you Ethiopian cock guzzler, The Love Dog's gunna fill ya with vitamins
Becky didn't come up for air as she took a full wad to the back of her throat. Had to push the **** off as I got that painful post ejaculation sensation coursing through my bellend. A few minutes recovery and I bent slinky over and in one motion stuck my chap into her dribbling ****. Felt every inch move in. Tidy burger love, now for a little more Love Ketchup....
So that was Pip 41 in a nutshell. Becky and I saw one another a few times after. She was Girlfriend material to be fair, but with too much going around around me, the moment was lost. Funnily enough I saw her once more a few days ago. That twinkle still remained in her eye. May strobe it again sometime soon
Over Christmas I'll edit and add to this thread. Got the bird floating about wondering what the fuck I'm typing on here. So 5 more tales to regale in their full filthy glory as and when I can, but for now.<br /><br />-- Mon Jan 14, 2013 10:47 pm --<br /><br />
Barcon said:Nobody likes a talker.
or a stalker..
BlueMoonRisin’
Well-Known Member
Very funny tales, had me laughing out loud. Mr Cunny, some great humour in there.
mrcunny said:And then I saw it. Her Ginsters Pie
My what big flaps you have ! The thought raced through my mind. They hung there between her legs like a Sunday Roast carvery. Didn't know whether to go down on her or make a jug of Bisto.....
LOL. I am cracked up here. what wonderful prose. This is the best thread I have read for some time. Can't wait fort the next instalment..........
charliebigspuds
Well-Known Member
cracking thread this, great bump.