Fuck that, much easier to just trot out the two fairy stories that end in Xmas presents or Easter eggs. Having said that, you could add another sentence to yours
'and that is why you won't be getting any silly chocolate eggs or presents'
Should save you a few quid.
Chocolate eggs are symbols of fertility that relate to the Northern European Ēostre festival linked to the Goddess of the same name.
The word Easter itself is actually related to the Sun or the sunrise or where the sun rises - the East. From our word Easter/East, going back to old English’s word ‘Ēostre’, the old High German word ‘Ostara’, the proto-Germanic word ‘Austrǭ’… and even going back 6,000 years to the proto-Indo-European word ‘Hausōs’ which has the same linguistic lineage.
These words all mean and meant “to shine” or “the dawn” (the Sun rises in the East at dawn), and there were goddesses attached to those names across many ancient religions: Germanic Godesses of the same name above, Roman ‘Aurora’, Greek ‘Eos’, Hindu ‘Ushas’, Babylonian ‘Ishtar’. And these Goddesses are also the Goddesses of fertility.
Festivals with big feasts and gift offerings were held across the world, including on this island, for thousands of years before Christianity was made up. Christmas symbolism we put up each year has almost nothing to do with the Christian church. Whether it’s fertility (again) symbolism of evergreen plants like holly, ivy, mistletoe or spruce/pine/fur trees; lights on a Christmas tree or the Yule log (either the traditional way of burning them or lighting candles on them) symbolising the burning of the trees to celebrate the coming of more daylight every day after the Winter Solstice, to presents under the tree symbolising the magic mushrooms that grow under Scandinavian spruce trees and baubles on trees are the mushrooms (ever wondered why you can get magic mushroom baubles?) the Saami/Siberian shaman (/Father Christmas) hang on trees that are eaten on the Winter Solstice:
All of them are very old traditions that are still worth celebrating, with no link to Christianity, because they’re all linked to science. Whether that be the celestial root of it all: the Sun… or biological importance of fertility and the celebration of children who we’ve passed our genes on to as we create generations and our species continues.
So definitely still give chocolate eggs and Christmas presents.