Emotional detachment.

[Dr Jacoby]

John Bowlby's and Mary Ainsworth's 'Attachment Theory' concluded that a child needs at least one strong attachment figure in their life to ensure they have a sense of stability and security. Without such a foundation in place, children are more prone to be insecure and vulnerable, thereby inhibiting them from branching out, taking risks and learning from exciting new opportunities.

Whilst the above strictly applies to children, Cindy Hazan and Phillip Shaver discovered similar results when applying the theory to adult relationships.

Though I have a learning difficulty, I believe I have difficulties expressing any aunthetic emotion because I have no strong emotional attachments to anyone. Whilst this might not be the same for you, it could be something to consider. There's also the possibility that emotional numbness is how depression manifests for you. I know it's certainly that way for me.

 

[Tricky Dickys Right Foot Shot]

John Bowlby's and Mary Ainsworth's 'Attachment Theory' concluded that a child needs at least one strong attachment figure in their life to ensure they have a sense of stability and security. Without such a foundation in place, children are more prone to be insecure and vulnerable, thereby inhibiting them from branching out, taking risks and learning from exciting new opportunities.

Whilst the above strictly applies to children, Cindy Hazan and Phillip Shaver discovered similar results when applying the theory to adult relationships.

Though I have a learning difficulty, I believe I have difficulties expressing any aunthetic emotion because I have no strong emotional attachments to anyone. Whilst this might not be the same for you, it could be something to consider. There's also the possibility that emotional numbness is how depression manifests for you. I know it's certainly that way for me.

That's interesting to know. I too don't have anyone I have a strong emotional attachment to.
I do feel as though I'm a lot more deprived emotionally than I was, say 5 years ago though and I still didn't have a strong emotional attachment then either.
Even in conversations with friends and family I find myself walking away afterwards and thinking, they must have been bored shitless listening to me go on.
My mates even joke about how bad it is to get a hold of me via phone as I never pick the thing up, I make an excuse up that I was "busy" but in actual fact I just watch it ring out. My biggest fear as a teenager was my friends becoming distant and us not keeping in touch, when in actual fact it's me who is now distant and a pain for them to get a hold of. Luckily I'm good at putting on a face and not letting them worry about anything.

My family have gotten it the worse though, I don't talk to anyone hardly in my family now, and when I do I just think about how I can make the conversation end asap.... It's not that I hate them either, I live with my mum as I can't get a mortgage and tbh she wouldn't be able to live on her own, and even in the same house I very rarely talk to her and it's not fair on her either.
It's not intentional on my part, when I think of saying this stuff to someone I just shit out and never do it.

 

[Stoned Rose]

See your GP mate. get some proper advice.

 

[Blue Whale]

That's interesting to know. I too don't have anyone I have a strong emotional attachment to.
I do feel as though I'm a lot more deprived emotionally than I was, say 5 years ago though and I still didn't have a strong emotional attachment then either.
Even in conversations with friends and family I find myself walking away afterwards and thinking, they must have been bored shitless listening to me go on.
My mates even joke about how bad it is to get a hold of me via phone as I never pick the thing up, I make an excuse up that I was "busy" but in actual fact I just watch it ring out. My biggest fear as a teenager was my friends becoming distant and us not keeping in touch, when in actual fact it's me who is now distant and a pain for them to get a hold of. Luckily I'm good at putting on a face and not letting them worry about anything.

My family have gotten it the worse though, I don't talk to anyone hardly in my family now, and when I do I just think about how I can make the conversation end asap.... It's not that I hate them either, I live with my mum as I can't get a mortgage and tbh she wouldn't be able to live on her own, and even in the same house I very rarely talk to her and it's not fair on her either.
It's not intentional on my part, when I think of saying this stuff to someone I just shit out and never do it.

If you feel you can't talk to your mates, try finding a 'person to person' therapist. As someone else has mentioned here, it could be that your asocial behaviour is a manifestation of depression or anxiety. We are deeply social animals and our sense of wellbeing generally comes from the health of our interpersonal relationships. By withdrawing from them, you could be missing out. Try and get help. I did and it really helped me understand why I had withdrawn from my friends and family. I'm much 'happier' now and in a close relationship I didn't think possible a few years back.

 

[PannickAtTheDisco]

the fact you've made the thread shows you want to talk, you just seem to have ploughed on with the same people and as a result you've over compensated and are now feeling detached.

I'd go and book in for a face to face chat with a therapist/counsellor, not because I necessarily think you have anything wrong but being able to just chat with someone you don't know in absolute confidence can just help you find the trigger for this change and put you back on track.

Also start to diversify what you get up to and just pick one free day you've got to go "right, of all the things I could possibly think of doing, or have wanted to do in the past but never got the chance, today I'm just going to go out and do this", new experience, new people and it gives your brain new stimulation, which sounds exactly what you need. A bit too "same old, same old" and your brain has gone into shut down.

 

[mayo31]

I agree with all that is being said about counselling.

I was asked at work to go on anger management. I did and the counsellor straight away said no way was I an angry person but fed up with work and people there. We talked about how to deal with it or leave and try something else. I trying to do both now but if I stay in a lot happier.

It has been noticed at work that I am more pleasant to be around. The counsellor helped find the issue.

I have shortened the story for ease.

 

[Saddleworth2]

That's interesting to know. I too don't have anyone I have a strong emotional attachment to.
I do feel as though I'm a lot more deprived emotionally than I was, say 5 years ago though and I still didn't have a strong emotional attachment then either.
Even in conversations with friends and family I find myself walking away afterwards and thinking, they must have been bored shitless listening to me go on.
My mates even joke about how bad it is to get a hold of me via phone as I never pick the thing up, I make an excuse up that I was "busy" but in actual fact I just watch it ring out. My biggest fear as a teenager was my friends becoming distant and us not keeping in touch, when in actual fact it's me who is now distant and a pain for them to get a hold of. Luckily I'm good at putting on a face and not letting them worry about anything.

My family have gotten it the worse though, I don't talk to anyone hardly in my family now, and when I do I just think about how I can make the conversation end asap.... It's not that I hate them either, I live with my mum as I can't get a mortgage and tbh she wouldn't be able to live on her own, and even in the same house I very rarely talk to her and it's not fair on her either.
It's not intentional on my part, when I think of saying this stuff to someone I just shit out and never do it.

Mate, I have some experience of it, and to me it sounds like you are suffering from depression and that all the symptoms you describe emanate from that. Difficult though it may be, your GP will refer you to a specialist councillor. In my experience, it's difficult to fix it yourself and good therapy in combination with appropriate medication may well help. Good luck to you whatever you choose to do.

 

[Blue Whale]

Read this article this morning. She talks about 'disassociation'. Thought you might be interested to read it:

https://www.theguardian.com/comment...ffects-psychotherapy-mental-health-crisis-nhs