Food that can do one

all of the following food types can do one.....

all kinds of beans - the texture is like nails down a blackboard - although i'll swallow baked beans without biting them
all kinds of peas especially mushy ones - garden peas can be swallowed
peanut butter - it looks and tastes (i imagine) like a turd
most things that live in the sea that aren't meant to be battered and served in newspaper
avocados
all scousers - not sure they strictly can be classed as food but they can fuck off anyway
all fruit teas - any tea that can't described as English breakfast tea or Yorkshire tea - funny I've never seen any tea plantations in Yorkshire mind you
tea served in those big round half a globe coffee cups. i want mine in a mug or a teacup thanks
all milk that doesn't come from a cow.
white wine - to be fair that's only meant for the ladies anyway
in fact all alcohol that isn't beer
all 'fancy' Belgian beer
american chocolate
twinkies
all savoury pies

Would have agreed with this 3 years ago. Until I stopped drinking cow's milk. Now I look back and wonder how I was brainwashed into drinking it in the first place. We don't need to breastfeed from a cow.
 

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