Grieving pets

[meeesh]

Anyone get another pet after the death of their beloved, deceased pet?

She’s already looking but through tears. I think she’s trying to fill that gap too soon.

Like I said in my previous post we did, around 12 months after and I couldn’t relate to her straight away as I was comparing and you just can’t do that, she wasn’t a replacement at all but took me a while to get that idea out my head, tell your partner to give it a bit of time before deciding is my advice

 

[LangleyBlue1970]

This is cat number 4 for me and it still doesn’t get any easier. She’s 17 and a half, but has spinal issues now and we’re at the cusp of what she can manage.

The house isn’t the same without them.

Cats are a weird one. I miss mine more than I’ll miss this lovely pooch, not because he was mine years ago but because there is a different understanding with cats than dogs. You’re theirs, whereas dogs are yours.

 

[LangleyBlue1970]

Like I said in my previous post we did, around 12 months after and I couldn’t relate to her straight away as I was comparing and you just can’t do that, she wasn’t a replacement at all but took me a while to get that idea out my head, tell your partner to give it a bit of time before deciding is my advice

I will, mate, and I’d posted that at the same time so didn’t see it.

Such a horrible time.

 

[meltonblue]

I’ve got this to come very soon.

I’ve got a border terrier called Walter, who is nearly seventeen (which is older than who the Mirror reported was the oldest border terrier ever, so I’m going to try and make him famous before he goes!). He’s had cushings disease for the last couple of years, which has been manageable by meds but old age and senility is really catching up with him now. The cushings means he can’t control his bladder but the entire of the downstairs of the house’s floor is already ruined from it so we’re long past caring about that.

It’s always been about making sure it’s the right time, which our vets are saying not yet and more importantly he’s telling us too. He’s in no pain and despite being pretty much blind now too, every night I get home from work he comes up, sniffs me, realises it’s me and acts like a puppy for an hour.

Personally I feel like I’ve grieved a bit already as it’s been a slow decline but I know it’s going to hit when the time comes as I’ve been through it before. It’s knowing how much it’ll hit my kids, they’re 20, 18 and 12 and either haven't or can’t remember a life without him. He’s been the most wonderful support dog to all of them too, he’s been there for all of them when they’ve needed him.

Said in a different thread a couple of months ago, I saw an old Room 101 with Julian Clary on it where he put the short life of dogs in there. Admittedly we’ve been stupidly blessed with how old Walter is now but I completely agree with the sentiment.

 

[KS55]

I had my best mate (Rescue Border Collie called Titch) fatally wounded by the dog next door pushing through the fence & attacking her on our garden last April & I am still strugling to get over it, you just get so attached to them, people keep saying to get another dog but I really dont think I could cope at the moment & it takes years to build the sort of bond we had,
The arrogant twats next door thought we could just carry on like nothing happened but I managed to get the Police involved & there dog was removed, Needless to say its as much as I can do not to attack the cretins every time I see them.

Mrs KS grieved over our dead cat. I urged her to get a new cat but she was inconsolable. Eventually, after several years, she acquired a new cat and it made a massive difference to her life. Now that cat is approaching the end. Please god she learns the lesson and replaces our Tao when he goes.
Pets don’t last too long, be realistic.

 

[richardtheref]

After we lost our 2 dogs, Zero and Belle, over 2 years my wife said 'never again ". After a month she said that the house was empty and we now have Cali.

 

[LangleyBlue1970]

Mrs KS grieved over our dead cat. I urged her to get a new cat but she was inconsolable. Eventually, after several years, she acquired a new cat and it made a massive difference to her life. Now that cat is approaching the end. Please god she learns the lesson and replaces our Tao when he goes.
Pets don’t last too long, be realistic.

What do you mean by that? Replace straight away like?

 

[Bigg Bigg Blue]

When you lose a pet it is like losing a family member.
I have always said when we have lost a pet that we will get another as there are plenty out there that need good homes.

 

[bluethrunthru]

My partners dog passed away yesterday. The dog attached to me the minute off and so, whilst she wasn’t mine, it’s a real horrible feeling that the little mutt isn’t here.

Today was a horrible day at work and I’ve just got back to my partner house. The mood is sombre and everyone is really upset. Pooch was 13.

What are your experiences of the death of pets?

Our cat is 18 this year so the end will come I suppose however my previous cat was 23 when she died. She was already deaf and had a massive stroke overnight and died. At that time it was a mercy to be honest - she was existing not living and bones thin.

However as it sank in I got really upset because I got the cat out of a litter when my granddad's cat had kittens - he was a Dunkirk veteran and a WW2 POW and my cat was the last link to him. Moreover she got her name " Fleckie" because I took her to my mum who shampooed her with flea killing shampoo and she said " she's a fleckie thing isn't she?" and the name just stuck. My mam died 10 years later so that link was cut too - my wife who didn't get on with the cat as she was something from my first marriage actually said she missed Fleckie because if she came home to an empty house there was no-one to talk to. Pets are deeply embedded in our lives and are mourned accordingly.

 

[bluethrunthru]

What do you mean by that? Replace straight away like?

I would hope so - when our Millie goes - she is 18 now - me and my daughter have plans to go to a RESCUE centre and I can't emphasise that word enough and we will happily take a sister and brother combo as I'd hate to split them up

 

[Mr Grumpy]

Anyone get another pet after the death of their beloved, deceased pet?

She’s already looking but through tears. I think she’s trying to fill that gap too soon.

We left it two years before we got another (even more bonkers) fluffy idiot in the house.

Felt about right imho.
I didn't want another one because of the responsibility and care they need and my family were deeply upset by the passing of the other.

However time is a healer and the opportunity arose so we got the new fella.

But each to their own tbh.

 

[LangleyBlue1970]

Some really lovely stories. I felt a bit daft really, posting, but it’s clear I’m not in my own.

Tonight, a day later and more tears shed, is hard.

I’ve took the responsibility to clear the bowls up and took the left over food to the Tesco charity bank. The kitchen is now as though there was never a dog. Horrible, but practical.

Thank you for the stories.

 

[meltonblue]

Some really lovely stories. I felt a bit daft really, posting, but it’s clear I’m not in my own.

Tonight, a day later and more tears shed, is hard.

I’ve took the responsibility to clear the bowls up and took the left over food to the Tesco charity bank. The kitchen is now as though there was never a dog. Horrible, but practical.

Thank you for the stories.

It’s the opposite of daft, it’s entirely what life is about. Grief is a consequence of how much we love and were loved by someone. The unconditional love a dog has, coupled with our love for them, is an incredibly strong thing and one of the purest forms anyone can get.

A life full of love is a life best lived, but it means grief is an inevitability. Better to have loved and lost and all that though :)

 

[Blue Boy 63]

So very sorry LanleyBlue . We lost our 22 year old cat Nash just over 14 weeks back and we miss her terribly . Life just isn`t the same without her around anymore . Not a single day goes by without me wondering around the house looking at her favourite places to sleep imagining she was still there with us . Losing them rips you apart inside .

 

[East Level 2]

Anyone get another pet after the death of their beloved, deceased pet?

She’s already looking but through tears. I think she’s trying to fill that gap too soon.

My partner was distraught when her 23 year old cat made his last trip to the vet, but got a rescue cat as a replacement about 10-11 months later. Completely different character in many ways but just as loud when she wants feeding.

 

[The Stockport Iniesta]

I had my best mate (Rescue Border Collie called Titch) fatally wounded by the dog next door pushing through the fence & attacking her on our garden last April & I am still strugling to get over it, you just get so attached to them, people keep saying to get another dog but I really dont think I could cope at the moment & it takes years to build the sort of bond we had,
The arrogant twats next door thought we could just carry on like nothing happened but I managed to get the Police involved & there dog was removed, Needless to say its as much as I can do not to attack the cretins every time I see them.

I've had 3 Boxers, each and everyone of them had a different personality but they were all amazing, I think the best thing I ever did was getting my 2nd Boxer. I saw my Dr about something and mentioned my dog had died to him and I was having trouble getting over it/missing him. And he said get another one, just simple advice but I acted on it and it changed my life for the better for his lifetime.

About your neighbours, it must be heartbreaking to lose your Dog that way and I'm not sure I could hold back, but credit to you for not getting yourself into prison over it.

 

[KS55]

What do you mean by that? Replace straight away like?

Well, quickly.

 

[AliBobbyJ]

We've lived with, cared for, been loved by and said farewell to six cats in all. Most recently, seven years ago, a kitten who we took to be spayed and she didn't wake up from the anaesthetic. But it's the price one pays for all they give you,. They are all missed and while "getting a new one" doesn't make up for the loss of the one we grieve for we think of it this way, that you're giving a home to a cat (or dog) who otherwise would be in a shelter. Or worse. Our current two are 17 and 7 and doing well (paws crossed.)

There's a poem "Rainbow Bridge" on line about reuniting with old friends. Might be a bit over-sentimental but I think it's lovely and something to hope for.

 

[idahoblues]

Our main man Trigger left us this spring, beyond gutted and then some. We decided to give it a break for awhile, lo and behold a situation arose, ended up taking two terrorists that were going to have to be spilt up etc. There are major growing pains but so glad to be back in the game

 

[PinkFinal]

My cat died in 2018 and I haven't got another one - because her sudden death one sunny Saturday morning after a single bite from a neighbour's dog (she used to go in their house scrounging, they loved her too) absolutely killed me. No exaggeration it was almost as awful as losing a close relative the same year. I wept buckets for days.