Iain Duncan Smith.

purplenose said:
It was quite amusing how it happened, I was in one of those shite nightclubs in Stockport with a mate off the football team I played for, Saturday night stuffed 8-1 or something stupid, so the pair of us went on the piss. Anyway few sherberts down I spot this mixed race bird, tight leopard skin dress, fit as fuck. My mate catches me having a perv, and starts giving it "out of your league" "You wouldnt even dare try" when he then said if i went and asked her out he would get the next two rounds and If I pulled he would buy the rest of the nights beer.

Two pints off him had to be worth getting told to fuck off, legs a shaking off I set toward this godess. I got within a few feet and bottled it, using the escape to the bog method, where I gave myself a talking too "come on you bellend, just go and ask to buy her a drink, get fucked off, and go and have two pints out of the fat bastard".

So deep breath out of the bog I stride straight over to where she was stood and with shaking hands taps her on the shoulder at which point she looked round....my mouth was now failing to function as was my brain and the simple "can I buy you a drink" failed to materialise and what came out was along the lines of (in croaky shitting it voice) "can I just ask you how a bloke like me could get an absolute godess like you" she replied "Am I supposed to answer that" To which I replied "yes please" I am now wanting the floor to open up or at least someone just to come and knock me out, when she says "I will come and join you in a few minutes after my mates stripper gram has been" (Hen night). For reasons best known to myself at the time I then said...."well thats a nice way to decline at least" she laughs and says "you dont think I will? Well go to the bar and get me a white wine" She then promptly throws her arms round me and gives me a massive snog (with tongues).

In the turmoil when this unexpected turn of events occured I recall whilst she was kissing me looking over her shoulder seeing my mate looking horrified but laughing his bollocks off at the same time....

I do appreciate that such tales of glory a rarely music to the ears of others but if its any consolation just 24hours later I was in fear of my life thinking I would not see daylight again such was her liking of my head being in just tits...Strong lass am lucky to be here to tell the tale.
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wow, your life must be great,i see you as a new age hippy sat in your room off your tits enjoying life through whatever mind alerting substances you have at your disposal, am I close ?
 
Looks like I'm in a very small minority, but read an article about 10 years ago about how he was convinced it was necessary to get people off a benefit way of life and into main stream society. I was impressed with his social commitment and the fact that he cared about people. He absolutely hated Blair who he considered was all talk, tricks, but no long term planning or solution.
Trouble is, IDS looks like a dentist so you just associate pain with him.

I suppose it's how you go about it.

Dons tin hat and suit of armour.
 
bluebc said:
sounds great, what exactly are the rules ?
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Well the official 2016 rules are along the following lines

1. Drink 4/5 tins of Stella and smoke 2/3 joints
2. Go to pub drink 4/5 bottles of that vimto coloured cider, a different coloured shot with each and at least 2 lines of coke off the cistern in the gents.
3. Just prior to leaving pub finish off with at least a couple of Jaeger bombs.
4. On arrival home roll a large joint, smoke half of it, put it out because the room is now spinning.
5. Make your way directly (bumping into at least 2 chairs a wall and trying to go through a closed door, before going a length over the cat) to the bog
6. Gripping both sides of the bowl to steady yourself just as you would hold the steering wheel on a bus....Clear now?
 
purplenose said:
Well the official 2016 rules are along the following lines

1. Drink 4/5 tins of Stella and smoke 2/3 joints
2. Go to pub drink 4/5 bottles of that vimto coloured cider, a different coloured shot with each and at least 2 lines of coke off the cistern in the gents.
3. Just prior to leaving pub finish off with at least a couple of Jaeger bombs.
4. On arrival home roll a large joint, smoke half of it, put it out because the room is now spinning.
5. Make your way directly (bumping into at least 2 chairs a wall and trying to go through a closed door, before going a length over the cat) to the bog
6. Gripping both sides of the bowl to steady yourself just as you would hold the steering wheel on a bus....Clear now?
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Is this some type of animal based sexual pageantry?
 
Barcon said:
Is this some type of animal based sexual pageantry?
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No not in the Manchester area or indeed here in deepest South Cheshire, it refers to a cat making minimal contact with your shins whilst you are in full flight resulting in you going down like Ashley Young, However across the border in Wrexham you would be correct.
 
johnny on the spot said:
His televised crocodile tears fooled nobody. The man has blood on his hands.
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Shropshire Star

http://www.shropshirestar.com/search/april+normandin/

Lad can't walk can't talk mental age of a toddler gets threatened with reduced benefits if he doesn't attend a back to work interview.

£140 million in bonuses for DWP staff .....for sanctioning people off benefits!

18 year old lad commits suicide after DWP threaten to half his benefits

http://www.welfareweekly.com/teenag...bcentre-staff-threatened-to-axe-his-benefits/

130000 will get their Christmas Day meal from a food bank this year contrast that with

£5 billion to repair the Houses of Parliament
£376 million to do up the house of the richest woman on the planet
£7.6 million to do up Wentworth Woodhouse (300 room home of Jacob Rees Mogg Tory MP for North East Somerset -who voted consistently to penalise benefit claimants who have a extra bedroom)

Remind me again who caused the financial crisis because it looks to me as though we are penalising the poor / disabled / pensioners for a problem caused by the rich and wealthy bankers
 
How many people are being paid to stop other people from getting the basics in life;?
(I. e. food, clean water, warmth and shelter. )
Apologies to Maslow!
 
Ifwecouldjust....... said:
Shropshire Star

http://www.shropshirestar.com/search/april+normandin/

Lad can't walk can't talk mental age of a toddler gets threatened with reduced benefits if he doesn't attend a back to work interview.

£140 million in bonuses for DWP staff .....for sanctioning people off benefits!

18 year old lad commits suicide after DWP threaten to half his benefits

http://www.welfareweekly.com/teenag...bcentre-staff-threatened-to-axe-his-benefits/

130000 will get their Christmas Day meal from a food bank this year contrast that with

£5 billion to repair the Houses of Parliament
£376 million to do up the house of the richest woman on the planet
£7.6 million to do up Wentworth Woodhouse (300 room home of Jacob Rees Mogg Tory MP for North East Somerset -who voted consistently to penalise benefit claimants who have a extra bedroom)

Remind me again who caused the financial crisis because it looks to me as though we are penalising the poor / disabled / pensioners for a problem caused by the rich and wealthy bankers
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Not disagreeing with the sentiment of the post, just fact checking the piece in bold. The 7.6 million is to save Wentworth Woodhouse which will then become a tourist attraction. It is also not the home of Jacob Rees-Mogg. It is the ancestral home of his mother in law, even she doesnt actually live there. https://www.ft.com/content/d5efd3a0-b32f-11e6-a37c-f4a01f1b0fa1 Mr Rees-Mogg’s mother-in-law, inherited the family fortune but not the home. She is one of the trustees of the Wentworth Woodhouse Preservation Trust, which has raised £7m to acquire the house.

I don't particularlly Duncan-Smith, Rees-Mogg or any Tory really, but i do support the saving of great buildings like this, particularly when it will boost the local economy and provide jobs and opportunities in the longer term.
 
Bewar3them00n said:
He's an absolute scum bag, lied n his CV, instigator of the DWP, which made chronically sick people go back to work, including disabled, and people with terminal cancer, paraplegics, and a man with the mental age of 6, bedroom tax for fuck sake!!! Screwing the poor and weak, to plug the gap left by the bankers screwing everyone over, yet conveniently doing fuck all to bring the real culprits to task.
He's wasted more money than he's supposedly set out to save with his schemes, including a disastrous new IT system which was later dumped and cost £90m, yet he has no qualms in going after the weakest and most vulnerable sections of our society, those with mental health issues, and the disabled, to scrape back few quid, calling them scroungers.
He's an evil, lying scumbag.
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And that my lord is the case for the defence!

The man's a c u n t!
 
Hoghead said:
Looks like I'm in a very small minority, but read an article about 10 years ago about how he was convinced it was necessary to get people off a benefit way of life and into main stream society. I was impressed with his social commitment and the fact that he cared about people. He absolutely hated Blair who he considered was all talk, tricks, but no long term planning or solution.
Trouble is, IDS looks like a dentist so you just associate pain with him.

I suppose it's how you go about it.

Dons tin hat and suit of armour.
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He actually threw his hissy fit after the Universal Credit work allowance was scrapped. It gave more to people who moved into work but Gideon scrapped it under austerity measures. Whether that was the sole reason remains to be seen, but IDS went up a peg or two for me after that.
 
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