I actually found it to be quite funny overall, especially these two:
2nd: Needing to add to their squad, Man City pursue Juventus star Giorgio Chiellini. Quoted a price of £25 million for the defender, the Citizens immediately lodge an opening bid of £37m.
23rd: West Ham United manager Avram Grant is once again caught exiting a local 'massage parlour' after the day's training. His wife continues to defend him: "If I had to try and teach Robert Green how to catch a ball, I'd need a way to relieve the tension too."