i've got a stalker

[citysince88]

call me an anarchist but i'm not really a contacting the police type of person.

Meh

Your funeral.

 

[Mr Kobayashi]

Is it really stalking you if you only ever see her on a tram?

She's probably just riding it back and forth all day. If she starts following you or you see her somewhere else then you should be worried then.

 

[SWPISHOME]

Seems a bit like the Del Boy and Dentist Secretary episode, It's all just a coincidence...

If I was you I'd take her home and flip her like a pancake, Sure why not...

Once you've done the deed, Take a different tram and it's all good.

 

[Magicpole]

I have the same problem now with Emily Blunt. She has been popping up everywhere. If it’s not sitting beside me on the bus, it’s siding up to me in pubs, the other day she turned up at my door, pretending to be selling pegs, to be fair, they were nice pegs, well made wooden ones, but that’s not the point.

I tried to get away from her by going away for a week to Amsterdam, but you guessed it, there she was, in the first coffee shop I went into. Sitting beside her? Beyoncé. Now I have both of them haunting my every move. They got my number somehow and now all I get is rude texts and selfies of their tits.

I’m at my wits end.

 

[dronefromsector7G]

I’ve had a stalker for 19 years. She keeps showing up at my house, in pubs and shops I frequent. When I ask what her name is she just replies “I’m your fucking wife”. Absolute loon

 

[Bill Walker]

I’ve had a stalker for 19 years. She keeps showing up at my house, in pubs and shops I frequent. When I ask what her name is she just replies “I’m your fucking wife”. Absolute loon

Pics ?

 

[Bill Walker]

quickly logged out as calum.
quickly logged in as drone to post that.
quickly logged out as drone.
quickly logged in as calum to post this.

record timing.

Ha bollocks, logged in as drone on laptop Calum on phone.
:)

 

[dronefromsector7G]

Ha bollocks, logged in as drone on laptop Calum on phone.
:)

No i didn’t. Me and drone are not the same person!

 

[Jesus H Gabz]

Leave some Tupperware with a freshly cooked curry in it & a fork sticking out, on the tracks :)

 

[talkativesprout]