You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an alternative browser.
You should upgrade or use an alternative browser.
Lonely
- Thread starter Why Always Ste
- Start date
Going through same thing.split with my lass of 3 years in January.was so used to having her and her 2 kids around me all the time n now it's just me.hit me hard start with and sat at bottom of the bottle.getting help with my drinking and my doctor has been amazing(drinking was affecting my health) and got me help I needed as well as case worker who's helping with non drinking stuff.getting there slowly it's a pain sitting alone at home watching lousy tv.got festival this weekend and seeing Liam Gallagher next in Glasgow so trying get out more instead of sitting festering.they say times a healer but doesn't help in the present I guess.best of luck blue and see you on the other side of this.
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
This forum (and I know it occasionally falls into the arguments at times) can be an utterly ace place. Not a big fan of the likes of Facebook (wasn't it Damocles who referred to that as a 'game' - and I get that), but deep down, there's such warmth and humour and intelligence on here that it's essentially a big 'hug' when all of us need one.
Similar thread to the depression and medication one - some wonderful advice on there too. Hard to give trusting advice really (there are a few on here who work in that realm who might be better at giving out more prescribed advice), some things you'd expect to help might not (walking for example...often not the best thing to do).
Oftentimes there's a battle in your head, usually overthinking stuff (in my case) and it can feel like you have to out fox it. Although I have a family, there are moments when I'm perfectly happy alone. I need that bit of peace occasionally and I'm someone who 'gets on with themselves'...but there have been moments when I felt the weight of loneliness and didn't particularly like it. These are usually when I'm not feeling buoyant mentally.
I cut down drinking a lot (almost to a whimper at the weekends), but there are times when it can be an utter joy (without alchohol during my teens, twenties and thirties I swear I'd never 'make sex', go out or ever meet a partner...it was my medication for pretty severe shyness and it worked, despite the side effects). Only as I hover around early forties as my shyness dissipated somewhat (how...I don't know, but letting go of self conscious feelings was a huge start). That's affected everything I ever did or tried to do.
I've only recently 'reconnected' with pubs (hard to get out with family life) and they're great social places, but these days I'm very mindful of the 'dark side' of drinking. Manchester's great in that even in the 'trendier' part of town (the NQ for example), the bars are generally ageism free....pubs tend to be like that anyway.
Can you exercise (usually good advice, but some people due to physical ailments cannot do much in the form of training)? I always 'go a little under' the moment I stop a sport...I started running at the end of last year - started of doing a park run (great opportunity to meet people/new friends) and then carried on from there. Unlike walking, running seems to override my 'overthinking bassoon' in my brain...pretty meditative, but also my thoughts are redirected to my aches and pains! Post exercise I'm frothing with endorphins.
Take that five a side offer up for a start Ste or bob down a Park run....there are dozens in and around Manchester.
Similar thread to the depression and medication one - some wonderful advice on there too. Hard to give trusting advice really (there are a few on here who work in that realm who might be better at giving out more prescribed advice), some things you'd expect to help might not (walking for example...often not the best thing to do).
Oftentimes there's a battle in your head, usually overthinking stuff (in my case) and it can feel like you have to out fox it. Although I have a family, there are moments when I'm perfectly happy alone. I need that bit of peace occasionally and I'm someone who 'gets on with themselves'...but there have been moments when I felt the weight of loneliness and didn't particularly like it. These are usually when I'm not feeling buoyant mentally.
I cut down drinking a lot (almost to a whimper at the weekends), but there are times when it can be an utter joy (without alchohol during my teens, twenties and thirties I swear I'd never 'make sex', go out or ever meet a partner...it was my medication for pretty severe shyness and it worked, despite the side effects). Only as I hover around early forties as my shyness dissipated somewhat (how...I don't know, but letting go of self conscious feelings was a huge start). That's affected everything I ever did or tried to do.
I've only recently 'reconnected' with pubs (hard to get out with family life) and they're great social places, but these days I'm very mindful of the 'dark side' of drinking. Manchester's great in that even in the 'trendier' part of town (the NQ for example), the bars are generally ageism free....pubs tend to be like that anyway.
Can you exercise (usually good advice, but some people due to physical ailments cannot do much in the form of training)? I always 'go a little under' the moment I stop a sport...I started running at the end of last year - started of doing a park run (great opportunity to meet people/new friends) and then carried on from there. Unlike walking, running seems to override my 'overthinking bassoon' in my brain...pretty meditative, but also my thoughts are redirected to my aches and pains! Post exercise I'm frothing with endorphins.
Take that five a side offer up for a start Ste or bob down a Park run....there are dozens in and around Manchester.
Yeah I get what you say about this place.its brilliant at times.took me a lot write a reply but felt had to share with OP.never been good with sharing even with my ex would keep everything to myself.so bluemoon I thank you.now to transfer thread for some light relief.
With pretty much anything, the moment you share your thoughts with others (and that in itself is tremendously difficult...quite possibly a 'man' thing) you've taken an important step. Many recommend keeping a daily dairy - posting on these boards is very similar. I guess when 'we' feel better then look back at our more anxious periods, we discover they, most likely, weren't 'all that'.
Planning an event/trip/something long term to prepare for will keep people occupied...a trip to a far flung place; mountain climb; 10k/half marathon/full marathon; one of those 'upper floor' orgies they've set up in Ancoats (according to a friend of mine)...
Planning an event/trip/something long term to prepare for will keep people occupied...a trip to a far flung place; mountain climb; 10k/half marathon/full marathon; one of those 'upper floor' orgies they've set up in Ancoats (according to a friend of mine)...
With pretty much anything, the moment you share your thoughts with others (and that in itself is tremendously difficult...quite possibly a 'man' thing) you've taken an important step. Many recommend keeping a daily dairy - posting on these boards is very similar. I guess when 'we' feel better then look back at our more anxious periods, we discover they, most likely, weren't 'all that'.
Planning an event/trip/something long term to prepare for will keep people occupied...a trip to a far flung place; mountain climb; 10k/half marathon/full marathon; one of those 'upper floor' orgies they've set up in Ancoats (according to a friend of mine)...
Ok, now im interested...
Machiavelli
Well-Known Member
york away to this!
Well-Known Member
- Joined
- 23 Jul 2009
- Messages
- 10,438
Yeah I get what you say about this place.its brilliant at times.took me a lot write a reply but felt had to share with OP.never been good with sharing even with my ex would keep everything to myself.so bluemoon I thank you.now to transfer thread for some hand relief.
So you like the it's quiet thread then?...
supercity88
Well-Known Member
- Joined
- 9 Aug 2009
- Messages
- 12,731
Although it is difficult and takes time you have to try and break the cycle. Try and flip the coin and appreciate the fact you are essentially free to do whatever you want. You could go on a trip of a lifetime, meet amazing people and give yourself a whole bunch of memories.
Why dont you go watch City in the us. Post on here and see if blues out there will put you up. Thats a way to meet likeminded people and have a great holiday.
Why dont you go watch City in the us. Post on here and see if blues out there will put you up. Thats a way to meet likeminded people and have a great holiday.