Maternity Leave

[blue_wkd]

So I start my maternity leave today. 8 or 9 months off work. Any ideas what i'm supposed to do in the month leading upto the baby arriving? I can see me being bored A LOT of the time!

 

[Banned Tosspot]

So I start my maternity leave today. 8 or 9 months off work. Any ideas what i'm supposed to do in the month leading upto the baby arriving? I can see me being bored A LOT of the time!

Watch daytime TV and after you drop get pregnant again.

 

[blue_wkd]

How do I get pregnant when I already am? Fool ;@)

 

[Banned Tosspot]

How do I get pregnant when I already am? Fool ;@)

See above fatty ;-)

 

[blue_wkd]

Oh you edited it!! Now I look silly......

 

[Banned Tosspot]

Oh you edited it!! Now I look silly......

Nothing new there bimbo ;-)

 

[JohnMaddocksAxe]

Hi Karen.

Didn't know they allowed internet connection in jail.

I think 'maternity leave' is stretching it a bit. A better term would be 'a five stretch'.

If you insist on getting knocked up again whilst inside though, make sure you don't get involved with those creepy prison officers. We've all seen Bad Girls

 

[Newlunar]

During the last month, practice breathing in and out quickly, yes I know you've been doing it all your life but it's a tricky technique and it helps apparently.

Also practice heating up towels and having them to hand because they are quite necessary.

Call your other half "A F**KING C**T and tell him you never want him near you again whilst similtaneuosly digging your fingernails into the back of his hand drawing blood. That way it won't come as such a hurtful shock at the birth.

Good Luck.

 

[johnny on the spot]

Take up FM2009. The time will fly by faster than spending your term watching Loose Women and Doctors.

 

[tueartsboots]

Try loose women on ITV followed by 2 hours of Jeremy Kyle on ITV 2- Class !

 

[denislawsbackheel]

fit a new kitchen
lay a patio
decorate

 

[Ally.P]

Seriously, just enjoy having some ME time.. Cos in a bit, that will be but a distant dream!! Savour it, every moment...I really mean that.

Good luck for the birth etc , it aint so bad, well..ok...tis really.

:-P