My Mrs is driving me effin mental.

Tuearts right boot said:
You clearly didn't do your due diligence and if you had you'd have known that the female of the species Homo Sapien is prone to many diseases.

PMT
Violence
Mad cow
Menapause
Tourettes
Mood swings
Schizophrenia
and finally
Conversation.

You only have yourself blame, as my Flower of the Orient says.
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That’s a list that rings a bell.
 
Tuearts right boot said:
You clearly didn't do your due diligence and if you had you'd have known that the female of the species Homo Sapien is prone to many diseases.

PMT
Violence
Mad cow
Menapause
Tourettes
Mood swings
Schizophrenia
and finally
Conversation.

You only have yourself blame, as my Flower of the Orient says.
Click to expand...
You forgot Dissociative amnesia.
 
When this happens to me I usually just send her down the basement for a bottle of Fizz, as she's halfway down I push the Sofa over the Hatch door. Problem solved
 
Worzel Gummidge#9 said:
When this happens to me I usually just send her down the basement for a bottle of Fizz, as she's halfway down I push the Sofa over the Hatch door. Problem solved
Click to expand...

I worry for the mental capacity of the woman, if she has fallen for that more than once. :)

Maybe she prefers it down there. That’s where the booze is.......suddenly it’s all falling into place.

Clever girl. She’s a keeper.
 
Magicpole said:
I worry for the mental capacity of the woman, if she has fallen for that more than once. :)

Maybe she prefers it down there. That’s where the booze is.......suddenly it’s all falling into place.

Clever girl. She’s a keeper.
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They didn't give you the nickname Einstein for nothing ;)
 
Magicpole said:
My beloved is off work sick, allegedly, I am off too and we are now on day 2 of, send for a doctor, I won’t make it till tea time, scenario.

I got up this morning, to be told she had been up since four o’clock, I said, you might have done the fucking dishes then, as a joke. You would have thought I shat in her tea.

We then proceeded, and when I say we, I mean she, to talk about how our bedroom needed a good clean and although in the demarcation stakes, that’s her job, how I never do it. I reminded her of the breakdown of tasks and she went into a huff.

She then went into her work site to deal with whatever she deals with and started talking about one of her students.

I was still pissed at her cheek, so honestly told her I don’t give a fuck about your students. Which I don’t. I hope they all do well and have fantastic lives etc, but the fact they are late two days in a row, is not a concern for me. We have been drawn against Valencia, are playing shite and need to buy players in the January window, so, not a lot of room to spare, mind wise.

I then got a 15 minute tirade about how I don’t care about her work and what she has to contend with.

Correct, I said in my mind.

Then it was how she hates wasted days and not doing something productive. As if that’s my fault. So I said. Hoping to be helpful.

You always go on about wasted days, but do fuck all about it. If you don’t want to have a wasted day, get off your arse and do something , all you do is moan about it, then look at me as if it’s my fault. You want a productive day, whatever the fuck that means, then do something apart from moaning.

Well, you should have heard her. Take that shitting in her cup and raise it to also strangling her mother with her own hair and we are still burning down an orphanage short of the rage level.

I went into the kitchen and cleaned it, the one she could have done at 4am.

I’m hoping to fuck she goes back to work tomorrow and gets herself into a better mood.

She will be off for two weeks come Friday and if they are anything like the last two days I am in trouble.

We haven’t even started Christmas shopping yet. I haven’t a clue what to buy her, so no doubt that will be another fucking thing to moan like fuck about.

How I keep my cheery disposition is a credit to my lovely personality.

Anybody else’s other half doing their head in?
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Buy her a hoover for Christmas, you can never go wrong with a hoover.
 
Magicpole said:
Doesn’t even have a cover, got it on eBay. Get her the cover next year. If she’s good.
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If she ever gets to read this, you're fucked......and not in a good way!
 
If you find one who doesn’t play games then she’s a keeper.

With football, we’ve often had our one individual thing to do each. Mine being the beautiful game and hers a hobby of some sort. That’s healthy. Only spend my own money etc.
 
peoffrey said:
If you find one who doesn’t play games then she’s a keeper.

With football, we’ve often had our one individual thing to do each. Mine being the beautiful game and hers a hobby of some sort. That’s healthy. Only spend my own money etc.
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But what have you bought her for Xmas is the question? Have you been romantic or just bought her any old shite?
 
peoffrey said:
I’m single. The last one worked Saturdays as a florist so we’d meet in the evening and head back to mine. She wouldn’t even ask the score.
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I hope you didn’t tell the nosey cow? You spend £40 to watch a game and she thinks you’re just going to spill the beans? Fucking Florists, they’re all the same.
 
My Mrs was never happy as I used to go to every City game. Said she never saw me at weekends as we live in Durham.
Qualified as a ref & when I was promoted. So found myself reffing Tuesday & Wednesday nights in the Northern League. Also reffed every Saturday & Sunday. All of a sudden it was not a problem not seeing me all weekend. The difference being I was getting paid to be away from home.
As my dad used to say "when you go to the zoo, the lions & the antelopes are kept in different pens for a reason yet men are expected to live with women".
 
richardtheref said:
My Mrs was never happy as I used to go to every City game. Said she never saw me at weekends as we live in Durham.
Qualified as a ref & when I was promoted. So found myself reffing Tuesday & Wednesday nights in the Northern League. Also reffed every Saturday & Sunday. All of a sudden it was not a problem not seeing me all weekend. The difference being I was getting paid to be away from home.
As my dad used to say "when you go to the zoo, the lions & the antelopes are kept in different pens for a reason yet men are expected to live with women".
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Are you a ref? You never said.
 
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