ardwickboy
Well-Known Member
Dave The Bragger>
Dave was bragging to his boss one day. "You know, I know everyone
there is to know. Just name someone, anyone, and I know them."
Tired of his boasting, his boss called his bluff. "OK Dave, how
about Tom Cruise?"
"No drama, boss. Tom and I are old friends and I can prove it."
So Dave and his boss fly out to Hollywood and knock on Tom Cruise's
door and Tom Cruise shouts, "Dave! What's happenin? Great to see
you! Come in for a beer!"
Although impressed, Dave's boss is still skeptical. After they
leave Cruise's house, he tells Dave that he thinks him knowing
Cruise was just lucky. "No, no, just name anyone else," Dave says.
"President Bush," his boss quickly retorts.
"Yup," Dave says, "old buddies. Let's fly out to Washington."
And off they go.
At the White House, Bush spots Dave on the tour and motions him and
his boss over, saying, "Dave, what a surprise. I was just on my way
to a meeting, but you and your friend come on in and let's have a
cup of coffee and catch up."
Well, the boss is very shaken by now, but still not totally
convinced.
After they leave the White House grounds, he expresses his doubts to
Dave, who again implores him to name anyone else. "The Pope," his
boss replies.
"Sure!" says Dave. "My folks are from Germany and I've known the
Pope a long time."
So off they fly to Rome.
Dave and his boss are assembled with the masses in Vatican Square
when Dave says, "This will never work. I can't catch the Pope's eye
among all these people. Tell you what, I know all the guards, so
let me just go upstairs and I'll come out on the balcony with the
Pope."
He disappears into the crowd headed toward the Vatican. Sure
enough, half an hour later, Dave emerges with the Pope on the
balcony, but by the time Dave returns, he finds that his boss has
had a heart attack and is surrounded by paramedics.
Working his way to his boss's side, Dave asks him, "What happened?"
His boss looks up and says, "I was doing fine until you and the Pope
came out on the balcony and the man next to me said, "Who the f**k's
that on the balcony with Dave?"
Dave was bragging to his boss one day. "You know, I know everyone
there is to know. Just name someone, anyone, and I know them."
Tired of his boasting, his boss called his bluff. "OK Dave, how
about Tom Cruise?"
"No drama, boss. Tom and I are old friends and I can prove it."
So Dave and his boss fly out to Hollywood and knock on Tom Cruise's
door and Tom Cruise shouts, "Dave! What's happenin? Great to see
you! Come in for a beer!"
Although impressed, Dave's boss is still skeptical. After they
leave Cruise's house, he tells Dave that he thinks him knowing
Cruise was just lucky. "No, no, just name anyone else," Dave says.
"President Bush," his boss quickly retorts.
"Yup," Dave says, "old buddies. Let's fly out to Washington."
And off they go.
At the White House, Bush spots Dave on the tour and motions him and
his boss over, saying, "Dave, what a surprise. I was just on my way
to a meeting, but you and your friend come on in and let's have a
cup of coffee and catch up."
Well, the boss is very shaken by now, but still not totally
convinced.
After they leave the White House grounds, he expresses his doubts to
Dave, who again implores him to name anyone else. "The Pope," his
boss replies.
"Sure!" says Dave. "My folks are from Germany and I've known the
Pope a long time."
So off they fly to Rome.
Dave and his boss are assembled with the masses in Vatican Square
when Dave says, "This will never work. I can't catch the Pope's eye
among all these people. Tell you what, I know all the guards, so
let me just go upstairs and I'll come out on the balcony with the
Pope."
He disappears into the crowd headed toward the Vatican. Sure
enough, half an hour later, Dave emerges with the Pope on the
balcony, but by the time Dave returns, he finds that his boss has
had a heart attack and is surrounded by paramedics.
Working his way to his boss's side, Dave asks him, "What happened?"
His boss looks up and says, "I was doing fine until you and the Pope
came out on the balcony and the man next to me said, "Who the f**k's
that on the balcony with Dave?"