Parents, Dementia and Money

[Blue Maverick]

On Friday my dad came very close to giving all his money to a very convincing fraudster on the phone, luckily a very switched on neighbour stopped him and since then I’ve helped him sort it out. He was diagnosed with Parkinsons a few years ago but my we’ve all noticed he’s not as sharp as he used to be, these bastards are good at been convincing especially with texts, emails etc. I’ve warned him numerous times but now I think it’s getting to the stage where I or my brother and sister need to step in.
Is there a way of taking control of his finances, I want to be able to block anything like this happening again, I don’t want to do this but I fear one day he will lose the lot, he easily does stuff and it’s a face plant moment when he tells me. He’s a proud man and I can see it upsets him but I want what’s best for him and my mum (she’s no idea about money etc).

 

[pirate]

On Friday my dad came very close to giving all his money to a very convincing fraudster on the phone, luckily a very switched on neighbour stopped him and since then I’ve helped him sort it out. He was diagnosed with Parkinsons a few years ago but my we’ve all noticed he’s not as sharp as he used to be, these bastards are good at been convincing especially with texts, emails etc. I’ve warned him numerous times but now I think it’s getting to the stage where I or my brother and sister need to step in.
Is there a way of taking control of his finances, I want to be able to block anything like this happening again, I don’t want to do this but I fear one day he will lose the lot, he easily does stuff and it’s a face plant moment when he tells me. He’s a proud man and I can see it upsets him but I want what’s best for him and my mum (she’s no idea about money etc).

there is
go and see a solicitor asap
the worse your dad gets, the harder it is to get, because he has to be mentally competant to hand you control
my dad had early onset parkinsons and we nearly left it too late
you also want to make sure you get power of attorney over both financial and medical decisions.
we just did financial and it led to huge complications with treatment etc

obviously this is only if its what your dad wants. if your dad doesnt want it, you cant force him

 

[stonerblue]

Do it tomorrow. Also sort out a proper will.

 

[sir baconface]

There is a way, OP. It’s called Power of Attorney. There are various types, so do a little research on what suits your dad best. They can be done online without great difficulty but you might consider using a specialist company who can give advice and guide you through the process.

Also, as stonerblue says, try and ensure he has a proper will.

 

[Blue Maverick]

He sorted a will out a few years ago with power of attorney but I thought this was for when he died so need to check on that.
@pirate what exactly does it let me do? Will he essentially have to ask me for money? Or can he have a little autonomy?

 

[lonestay]

Feel for ya going through the same thing myself , my Father flatly refused to sign power of attorney paperwork and now dementia has gone too far for that avenue now .

 

[Alan Harper's Tash]

He sorted a will out a few years ago with power of attorney but I thought this was for when he died so need to check on that.
@pirate what exactly does it let me do? Will he essentially have to ask me for money? Or can he have a little autonomy?

Lasting power of attorney for people with dementia

A Lasting power of attorney (LPA) is a legal tool that lets you choose someone you trust to make decisions for you. There are two different types of LPA: property and affairs LPA and health and welfare LPA. LPAs can make things easier for you and the people you are close to as your dementia...

www.alzheimers.org.uk

Good luck blue.

 

[Brooklands Blue]

He sorted a will out a few years ago with power of attorney but I thought this was for when he died so need to check on that.
@pirate what exactly does it let me do? Will he essentially have to ask me for money? Or can he have a little autonomy?

If your dad has given you POA for both health and welfare and financial you should register them with the Office of The Public Guardian. This will give you control over your dads finances and also what treatment he receives towards his health. I'm an ifa and I recommended all my elderly clients put a good estate planning package in place including the LPA'S.

 

[Blue Maverick]

Cheers guys talked to my sister and we are going to see my mum and dad tomorrow to get it all sorted, wish I didn’t have to, getting old is a bastard.

 

[denislawsbackheel]

power of attorney cannot be taken, it can only be given. Your dad has to give you the power to act on his behalf financially.
The paperwork can take a few weeks to get sorted.

it can only be given by a donor who has full mental capability. If dementia has been diagnosed you cannot be given it.

power of attorney ceases as soon as the donor dies.
Their affairs are then taken over by their executors, named in their will.

It might be worth talking to his bank. If you alert them to his vulnerability they may be able to put a marker on his account to stop unusual or large transactions happening.